


One man's trash is another man's treasure

by MagicalGhost96



Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Denial of Feelings, Gen, God hopefully i can put all the pining, JonMartin on the side, M/M, Mutual Pining, No beta we kayak like Tim, Paranoia, Platonic JonDaisy, Social butterfly vs anxious introvert who would win in a battle of miscomunication? lets find out, Will tag more characters as they appear, i will make the content i want to see in this world, misundertandings, still evil tho, they dont deserve nice things but im gonna sort of give it to them, two bastard idiots in love, typical Forsaken bulshit, typical beholding behavior, very weird and specific soulmate au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-17
Updated: 2020-09-23
Packaged: 2021-03-06 06:13:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 47,661
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25948657
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MagicalGhost96/pseuds/MagicalGhost96
Summary: Soulmate Au where the things you lose end up with your soulmate.
Relationships: Elias Bouchard/Peter Lukas
Comments: 42
Kudos: 96





	1. Chapter 1

James is annoyed, he has been looking for his favorite tie nonstop for the last 15 minutes and hasn’t been able to find it anywhere that he usually puts it. He really wanted to use it on today’s funding gala but apparently that is not going to work.

It’s not the first time that something of his has disappeared never to be seen again. He would have suspected Spiral intervention if the objects in question weren’t so… common actually, nothing that, if he notices he couldn’t simply replace. Still it seems he would have to wear another one unfortunately. He decides to just be more careful about where he puts his possessions so as not lose anything of importance, that most thing are not importance doesn’t mean the ones that matter can’t start to disappear too.

He finishes dressing up and puts his second favorite tie on while looking at himself in the mirror. He has aged well, he did choose this body with something like this in mind, however he is going to need a replacement soon, James is getting quite in his years. He does have some more time, maybe in a year or two he supposes, enough of a time frame to tie some loose ends and prepare his... “Replacement”.

He reaches the meeting place and prepares his polite smile, to remind some of the less supernatural inclined donor why they should keep investing. When that is done the ones that actually matter, meaning Fairchild and Lukas, come next. He supposes Nathaniel presence is unavoidable, dreadful man truly, stiff as a board and with none of the presence of Mordechai. Then again he has been told that comparasitions are not exactly very nice, they are different people.

“Mr. Wright hello we were expecting you, though some spooky business kept you up right?” He sees one of the regular donors and starts to give him his most polite smile. The man in question is very annoying, doesn’t believe in his institution, but has to comply with his family’s wishes, he supposes some reminders of his little affairs and certain activities in his trips will do nicely to keep him in line. The nigh is quite young yet.

After almost an hour of wrangling and securing several rich people’s money, he decides to take a quick break and have a drink before talking with either Simon or Nathaniel. On his way unfortunately he finds himself face to face with the latter.

“Nathaniel!”

“James, nice to see you” He says that with the disdain of someone who would rather be anywhere else, and is in fact not happy to see him.

He smiles his more shark like smile “I was about to get a drink and get to business with you”

“Certainly, however that could wait, I do have to talk about certain changes”

That was not expected and he did not like the sound of, the thought of not receiving the funding his family provided and have to depend on only Simon’s good will was horrifying. The man was rather flighty with his decision, more for his own amusement than anything else.

“Oh? Well I’m sure we can...”

“My nephew Peter is going to be in charge from now on of The Institutes funding”

“I see, any reason to this?” He is quite unsure about this, he wants to see why but knows that to do that to Nathaniel will be… Less than a stellar decision.

“He is old enough to start to do more of the family work than just regular sacrifices to our patron, besides I am needed to do more business elsewhere and he is…” at that the man scowled, which was odd, true the Lukases were never close but usually if a member is true to Forsaken they tend to be rather neutral.

“ _Is there a problem with him_?”

“He is faithful, very much so, but some of his methods aren’t quiet to our tastes. Stop that” He looks at him reproachful.

“Well will I meet him today or in another year?” Having to adapt to someone else is not ideal, but he will have to do. Most of the people from the family were rather simple to manage, they would rather give him money or stuff just to get him away from them.

“He is over there.”

When he turns to the direction the other pointed at him, he sees a man next to Simon to whom he seems quite pleased to talk with. Peter, he assumes, is quite possibly the opposite of his uncle, or well, most of the family, who seem to have inherited Mordechai’s wife features (all lanky with sharp angles), he on the other hand is tall, with broader shoulders and a larger bulk.

The stark difference with Simon who is, by regular standards, rather short and thin but seems to occupy the whole space and the other man who seems to try and make himself less noticeable is hilarious. He sees that no one seems inclined to approach them.

Jonah does notice the other man looks rather well but it’s more of a passing though than anything else. The future of his institute funding is more pressing, and honestly he would do without the drama or complications. _Goodness he is getting old_.

“Well I’ll see to make an introduction then” Nathaniel only looks at him and nods. He walks to the others location and starts to hear them speak.

“So you see in my last trip to America there was this delightful chap who was, and hear this, terrified of rollercoasters so his friends managed to get him to tag along with them. So I got to sit right next to him, kid looked green I patted him a little and waited. You should had seen his face when the ride started and we reached the top I turned to him opened the safety measure and just pop disappeared. The entire cart was stuck in a never ending rollercoaster. God knows how long they all stayed stuck there” Simon just kept talking, he wonders if the incident was reported in the Usher foundation, he is kind of curious. Peter looks… amused actually. Very different indeed.

“Hello gentleman I was informed by Nathaniel of certain changes regarding business, the name is James Wright you must be Peter” He smiles at the other and tries not to stare too much, knows it tend to unnerve those of the family and he is hoping for a nicer relation (at least for now)

“… Peter Lukas” he says that very dispassionately, maybe not so different then.

“What a greeting, where are your manners young boy”

“Simon I’m 27 and a captain of my own ship so not a young boy anymore,” He sounds exasperated and like they already had this conversation before.

“Can’t blame me if most of you are kids in comparasition, besides I have known you since you were younger”

“Ehem gentleman”

“Right well funding will go as always James no problem from my side” Simon laughs, there is a feeling of weightlessness for a few seconds. He tries to not stumble.

“That is good to know Simon” When this is done he is getting a drink. “And you Peter I suppose we must start with...”

“I’ll pay, just stop smiling like that its unnerving” _THE NERVE “Like what?”_

“Like you’re thinking how to rob me blind and stab me. I will pay like it’s agreed and we will not have to talk hopefully more than necessary” The man finishes saying that all while avoiding eye contact and frowning slightly.

“I see, well at least there would be one less problem” He wants to strangle him with his stupid tie.

He is so incensed that he doesn’t notice the familiar tie that the other is wearing.

He says goodbye to Simon and to Peter by extent and leaves. He gets his drink talks a little more and eventually leaves.

By the time he reaches his apartment he is spent, the night was long and tiring and he would like to go to sleep.

While changing and doing his nightly rituals he does think about the younger Lukas and how annoying he was. Finally he goes to bed and after tossing and turning in his bed he finds the right position and falls asleep.

Jonah never noticed the pair of cufflinks that appeared in his nightstand before he left, navy in color and looking like little waves.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I remember reading a premise like this once and though it would be hilarious to try with this two and see how long does it take for them to realize.  
> Scream at me in the void about lonelyeyes in my [tumblr](https://p1nkwitch.tumblr.com/)


	2. Chapter 2

He keeps in contact with Peter for the next two years. Mostly just to annoy the man, not enough that it would impede his funding but to keep him in his toes so to speak. Every time they talk in the phone, usually so he can ask for financial help, they end up going back and forth with each other, sniping and clashing at each other. The first time he called him, Peter hanged up on him, after another call and some arrangements they picked a monthly meeting.

James does admit that he might have found the other more entertaining than previously thought and also different than his family in a delightful way, they share their love of bets and Peter seems to have a rather unique sense of humor.

Their bantering and bickering back and forth is quite the stimulating endeavor, compared to his usual business partners. He does whoever refuse to acknowledge that he might be enjoying their monthly calls more than expected. It’s a matter of principle, to give such a leeway to someone of his upbringing would be nothing more than a mistake.

During that period more of his stuff starts to disappear, he has given up in trying to find them, it would be pointless honestly, so he is not even surprised when a jacket he forgot to put back after getting back home is nowhere to be seen.

Things however started to appear. None of them belong to him, most of them clash horribly with his style half of the time, some are more innocuous like pair of socks that he Is sure he never bought or weirder stuff like a beanie hat that he would not be caught dead wearing.

James knows now what it is, he just decides to ignore it. There isn’t really a point for a soulmate to him, not really, he has better things to do. He isn’t very happy though, since losing stuff and getting trashy thing back is not exactly a good trade off. In the meantime “James” is ready to step down and be replaced, Elias Bouchard is going to be the perfect new head of the Institute in very little time.

Arrangements had been done and in less than 24 hours he would have to faze the announcement of his own demise, very morbid indeed, although considering the amount of times the process already happened it has lost its touch. With that in mind he checks the time and sees Elias coming to the office, with the eyes of several paintings.

He gets up, notices a small sea shell that wasn’t there sitting innocuously on top of his papers, sighs and moves the thing to his drawer, (The thing is full of other nick knacks, buttons, more sea shells, a single glove, a tiny figurine of a whale the size if his pinky) he will get rid of them eventually, they occupy space and are mostly trash. (Fact: he has said that the last 3 times something has appeared and yet…)

He is vain and the fact that for the first time in almost 200 years he gets this is well, kind of flattering even if his soulmate seems to have a weird taste. That and he is a collector, doesn’t matter that Simon keeps calling him a hoarder, and knowledge as inconspicuous and useless as it is, its still knowledge, so to destroy it would be… against his values. ´

Elias is about to knock the door so it’s time to start the process, things are looking up it seems.

Three hours later and he regrets everything.

Splitting migraine (taking someone’s eyes and replacing them doesn’t leave you in a stellar condition), slight buzz from the weed the other consumed and not to forget getting acquainted with a whole new body isn’t exactly great. He is sure that every time he does this it gets worse.

So right now Elias is just resting, completely sprawled and slightly high, on the floor of the Panopticon of course. Everything feels too much, even the dim light of the place hurts, if he left like this he doesn’t think he would make more than five steps before collapsing. The start of a great weekend indeed.

Two hours later and he managed to leave things exactly as they were planned. And now he has to go to “his apartment” next thing he does with his new position money is to move from that place. All of the possession he might wanted to keep are in the safe room he has in the institute ready to move, when he is ready, into whatever place he chooses next.

He takes a quick shower and prepares to sleep for the next day, the clothes he has aren’t great but it would have to do. And so he changes the sheets for a cleaner pair and falls asleep immediately.

It must be after midday when he wakes disgruntled, hungry and with a headache, Elias peels himself off from the bed and when he gets up to look for something better to wear he sees a sweater that wasn’t there before on the bed. The thing is light blue and if he were James it would be just slightly bigger than his frame, but as Elias it’s rather big, most likely covering his hands and reaching to his mid thighs.

Most of the clothes from the original Elias are rather tacky and the thing looks better than most of the other objects he got before and also… definitely more comfortable than what he is wearing now, he realizes, as he touches the sweater.

He looks at it as if it personally offended him, but eventually he sighs and decides that until he gets better clothes he might as well. He puts the thing on, warm and indeed very soft, Elias does feel better wearing it, can also smell something like cologne on it.

He shrugs, grabs his phone and calls for delivery, finally he goes to work on his laptop to fix some last issues before the takeover on Monday and to start looking for a new place to live.

Everything ran as smoothly as expected, well almost, Gertrude kept looking at him the entire time, she did congratulate him but it felt more like a threat. The woman is very sharp, terrifyingly so, but very efficient ruining other people’s rituals.

Besides that, the funeral will be next week so in the meantime, he must get acquainted with his new job.

He manages to get a new place, rather quickly, so by the end of next week he might move. He still need to buy more suits to his tastes, but he has time.

Cravings for weed are not ideal, but after a particular bad day he does cave and uses some of the leftovers, he will need to get over it.

Despite getting some of the garments he ordered, he still wears the sweater he found mostly at home. Tries not to think too much about it and focuses and putting everything to his tastes. He feels calmer all together, that was something the original seemed to be like, and getting rid of all the aspects of the people he becomes its almost impossible so some things must remain.

The day before the funeral, he finds a blue scarf on his couch, the weather is rather chilly and he hasn’t been able to find his green one yet, so he takes it.

As the newly appointed head, going to the funeral was a requirement, when he gets there several people of James circle are there. Most of them did not like him at all, they are here to offer empty condolences and to gloat later about not having to deal with him anymore. He finds it amusing and can’t wait to imply the other man left notes to blackmail them from.

Elias stays during the whole affair and when it’s done and the casket is out in the ground he gets up to leave. When doing so he notices the figure sitting further away from the rest almost as if no one wanted to sit near him.

Surprised he didn’t expect Peter to come to the funeral, he thought he was still out at sea. Curiosity wins and he decides to brush beholding to see what he was thinking.

It was unexpected to see that the other, did not quite like James, but he felt a pang of loss very apt for the one alone. Apparently their talks on the phone without seeing each other face to face made him rather more palatable to the sailor. Well he didn’t seem to be the only one having fun then.

He notices the startled look the other gives at the feeling of beholding and smirks slightly, on a whim and because he is unsure when the other will be on land again, Elias goes to introduce himself. He goes and sits with the other not giving him a chance to disappear.

“Hello, you seem to be rather alone here, did you knew James?” Playing him it’s going to be fun, Peter looks uncomfortable to the extreme with the attention, the Eye is having quite the meal.

“Well yes in a way”

“Mm, quiet the dreary process right? Did not like him that much in particular but I appreciated the promotion before his death”

“Promotion?”

“Yes, what are my manners, Elias Bouchard new head of The Magnus Institute and you?” At that Peter does finally look him. He looks at him right back and tries to hold back a smile. Two years and the man seems to already start greying at 29, the Lonely he supposes.

He does take better notice this time of the others face and he has rather good looks indeed, grey eyes look at his green ones for a second before lowering them to some point behind him.

“Peter Lukas” He is slightly shocked to see the man answer him that quickly but he recovers

“Well well, I read about you and your family regarding funding, I suppose meeting even like this is as good as any moment, hopefully we can have an amenable relationship and be in good terms about funding”

Peter suddenly looks back at him again, staring at his eyes, before squinting slightly, he notices for some reason the other man has some very small freckles just barely there honestly, and he feels his palms to sweat slightly.

“James?” He freezes for a second but recovers

“Mr Lukas, you are rather-“

“I can tell it’s you”

_“How do you know?”_

“I would recognize that look on your face of wanting to rob me blind while speaking about money, truly it’s not so hard to tell, also you have the same eyes, very nice ones, fit you better like this than with Ja-“ Peter stops, he looks surprised before he starts to blush in what might be embarrassment, and proceed to try and disappear.

Try, because Elias grabs his arm with an iron grip. His palms are still sweaty and his blood is pumping like crazy, be it for the fact that he got discovered or because he might have got a compliment from the other. However he starts to spiral, is he that noticeable? Does anyone know? Gertrude certainly looked like he wanted to hit him. The others at the institute? Were they speaking against his back did they realize his eyes didn’t match? Surely they wouldn’t, Elias was not important to anyone, mostly a nuisance but what if what if…

Peter tries to shake him off and that is enough to just put him back on earth, he feels beholding’s grasp on him, feeding. That hasn’t happened in a while, the fear of discovery hitting him like this. After a few seconds he replies.

“I see, I will take that into consideration then, however we might have to talk about not speaking about certain things Peter” He sees the other swallow when he finishes saying his name and look to the front. Rather bashful, for someone like him.

“Is this the moment where you threaten to kill me?” he say that with a light tone, almost amused. He blinks at that, he thinks of threats, he knows that just by putting the right information he could absolutely destroy him, but, but at the same time the man has proven to be rather interesting, so to lose that and the monetary issues it would cause, plus dealing with another Lukas who is boring as hell, Elias decides then to try another tactic.

“Well maybe, or maybe I can find other ways to make you reconsider”

“I don’t particularly care and truly there isn’t really others I would tell so there isn’t really a problem” He doesn’t seem to realize the full extent of who he really is which is a relief.

“True but there are certain aspects that-“ He cuts himself and notices that people are starting to leave, true it does not affect them but he thinks there are better places to be having this conversation.

“I believe we should continue this conversation another time and in a more private place. Perhaps we could arrange a meeting. _Does your ship sail soon_?”

“By the end of the month, could you not please” he looks annoyed ”I don’t fancy having a business meeting with you, I feel like I might not walk out of it”

“There are other options available of course, you don’t have to think about it as business then”

“How would you put it?”

“Like a friendly meeting between fellow avatars.

“Sounds delightful” The sarcasm is strong in that one “So what, you want to go have dinner with me?”

“I would love to”

“Wait no I didn’t mea-!” Now, at that, the other almost chokes, and the flush he had gets worse, he can see his freckles better like this, and feels something like anticipation build.

“How about a bet with? It if you manage a way to surprise me during the duration of the dinner you get an answer to any question you like”

“And if I don’t?”

“I ask you anything I want, an eye for an eye as they say”

Peter looks troubled thinking about it, he ends up giving him slight looks and eventually he answers

“Where and when?” Line, hook and sinker

“I’ll send you my address so you can pick me up, and how about Friday? I would even let you pick the place” He is actually looking forwards to it, the gamble could go against him but a question about the other and the Forsaken would be perfect for beholding. He ignores the flutter his chest has when the other leans a little closer to him with some pink on his cheeks.

“Sounds good, well Mr. Bouchard it was a pleasure meeting you, see you this Friday then” All said with a fake little up tilt in his voice (very pleasant).

“Likewise Mr. Lukas” Elias starts to leave while putting on the scarf, but turns to look into Peter’s direction when he hears a distorted sound that starts to come from around him. Before he disappears into the fog he seems to remember something, because he turns to the chair next to him and grabs a piece of fabric. Elias doesn’t see what it is exactly but can distinguish the green color it has, the next moment he is gone

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Scream at me in the void about lonelyeyes in my [tumblr](https://p1nkwitch.tumblr.com/)


	3. Chapter 3

The next few days went rather quickly and uneventful even the move to his new apartment. He focused on work and tried not to think too much about Friday’s dinner. There was a high chance of the other just not coming, after all, there is a nice touch of loneliness of waiting for your date but them not coming. So Elias wasn’t expecting too much, he would deny any kind of anticipation since it would most likely end up in nothing but disappointment.

During the week he got several compliments about how well he was adapting, Gertrude still seemed like she was studding him for any mistakes, which was very inconvenient.

Beyond that, work was a relief since he could at least, under the pretense of being new, take some time to figure out how was he going to manage things, a little change from host to host was always bound to happened, after all to keep the same work efficiency as his predecessor was suspicious so instead he was taking things a little more easy. It would not be forever, god no, but until he gained more “experience” he has more leeway on how to behave.

After the incident with Peter he took to check on his employees minds to see if there was anyone thinking along the same lines, but apparently is was for nothing since at most, some though that he and James had a very inappropriated relationship which was why he got the promotion instead of others who were apparently more qualified. No matter, performance reviews were coming soon and those who are more likely to spread rumors would be dealt with swiftly.

Friday comes fast and while Elias goes over some budgeting he’s mentally going about what outfit he should wear if Peter does come. Since the other hasn’t said anything about where would they be going, being to overly formal could be too much, so semi-formal should do.

When it’s time to leave after saving his progress, he grabs his things and goes. He finds his car keys with the boat keychain that appeared last week in his drawer, no longer he questions what he finds and results on using whatever feels less tacky.

His soulmate has a very particular taste, most of the objects he finds have an obvious nautical or sea fairing theme, however they are very disconnected, almost like if someone picked them randomly for their look and immediately put them away to never be seen.

He gets in the car and drives home to prepare. He thinks about calling Peter to check if he is coming mostly so he doesn’t prepare for nothing, but knows the other would most likely not pick up.

Eventually he goes to shower and when he is done to pick an outfit, it takes the better part of an hour but decides on a deep green colored jacket, black turtle neck shirt, dark grey pants and a pair of boots. Classy but casual, and if everything goes to shit at least he didn’t wear his best.

With 20 minutes to spare, he checks some of his employees and works on some papers left to work from James, until, the eye lets him know its 8:10 and the other hasn’t showed up. He feels a treacherous slight of disappointment along with anger, lots of it.

Twenty minutes later, he was starting to plan how to commit a crime and explain why he killed his nephew to Nathaniel when the door rang. A quick check with beholding let him know the other was waiting outside. Miffed but unsurprised with the turn of events he calms down and decides to pretend everything is okay to not give the other the satisfaction.

He waits to open the door just to make him squirm a little, and when he feels it’s enough goes to open it.

“Peter running a little bit lat-“ He tries to sound unaffected but cuts himself up at the last moment when he really sees the other.

The only two times they met face to face Peter was wearing a suit fit for a party and a funeral. Now however he’s sporting a more casual look that fits his frame unfairly well. Long dark blue overcoat, green scarf (seems familiar), light blue and white striped sweater, white dress shirt underneath and black pants. He coughs to make his little slide look less suspicious.

“I take it you were trying to make a point” He offers neutrally.

“Hello Elias, I don’t know what you are referring to, traffic was terrible so it took me longer to get here” Peter seems to be looking at a point nest to his head while speaking, refusing to make eye contact and struggling not to smirk. Well, if he’s playing like _that._

“I see, well I hope whatever you planned for our dinner hasn’t been ruined by this little _incident_ , unless of course you want to forfeit our little wager” At that the other frowns a little.

“Of course not, I can assure you everything is still on plan, shall we?” As he says that he starts to turn away, but before he can manage, Elias interlocks their arms while smiling up at him. If the other thinks he can get away without him making him pay he is very wrong.

“Lead the way” Peter stiffens immediately and gives him a side look but does not dislodge him (odd). Taking him to his car, he opens the door for Elias, while he turns to his side and gets in. Once inside, Elias turns to Peter and raises an eyebrow.

“What?”

“Are you going to tell me where we are going or should I just pick it up right from the source?” He wants to push his buttons a little to see just what would happen.

“If you do that you might ruin the surprise for later and the bet would have to be called off” Elias scowls a little at that and turns his head to the window. He is not sulking.

“Fine. Be that way” He hears the other chuckle at that, and when he looks trough the reflection on the glass he sees the other amused grin. _That…_ makes him turn his face even more to the window and his stomach to do something funny, he should not have ate those god damned cookies, but they were so good.

The car ride is quiet. He doesn’t feel the need to fill the space with sound and when Peter realizes that he seems to relax. Elias looks at the people outside and from time to time knows something from them, he hums pleased at that. Enjoying the quiet and the chance to observe and know others while making them have a slight jolt of memories that they would rather not remember.

He smiles slightly and takes joy in the smallest pleasures.

So enthralled he was, he didn’t notice the car stopped, and only when he felt watched he turned around and noticed Peter observing him. The man seem to realize what he was doing and turned quickly.

“We have arrived! Now, it’s just across the park so let’s go” He gets out fast and starts walking to cross the street.

Elias gets out, locks the door and follows him.

“Are you sure there wasn’t any problem with the time you seem on a hurry” He teases Peter and tries to keep up but the other has longer legs.

“Could you perhaps slow down a little” The other man does slow down at that.

“Oh? Do you have trouble to keep up then, might be inconvenient to have such shorter legs in comparasition to before, huh little men” Peter sounds delighted while speaking, Elias meanwhile has reached him and proceeds to shove him to the side so he can keep going ahead, how dare he, if the night doesn’t end with a knife sticking out of the others hand it would had been ruined.

“Not at all, maybe you are the abnormal one, have you thought about that?”

“Not at all! Well anyhow, if you could perhaps stop, since we arrived it would be great”

Elias stops in his tracks and looks at the restaurant in front of him, the place unlike his previous interactions with other Lukases is not devoid of people, but completely normal. He looks at Peter questioningly but the other shrug’s and goes in, even lets the door open in what he assumes is an attempt at courtesy. He huffs and just follows.

The waitress sees Peter and silently guides them to their table, some things are at least predictable. What is not however, is the location, the table is against the wall and the window but it’s more of an advantage point where you could be surrounded by all sides by others and yet not be forced to interact with them in the slightest. They sit and before the waitress go back she handles them their menus.

Elias decides to read it now before making any comment to the other, he is not going to make it easy for Peter to win. Peter looked like has about to say something before he had to jerk himself back because of the smack of him opening the menu with more strength than necessary. He gives a shaky smile then and grabs his. Points to himself.

After finding what he wanted to order, he put the menu down and decided to look at his date. Peter had removed the long overcoat so now he was just in his sweater and dress shirt, he could see him better like this and had to admit he looked really good, even with the scruffy beard that he was attempting to let grow. The other man looked mildly uncomfortable at his gaze.

“So are we going to order?”

“Of course if you are done”

Peter made a movement with his hand the same waitress came with a notepad and when they told her their orders left.

“Quite the interesting location to choose, one would think an empty restaurant would be your main one at least” Peter snorts at that and smirks at him.

“Clearly you don’t seem to know everything, there is nothing more lonesome than being surrounded by others and yet still know how truly alone you are. A place like this is perfect for that kind of feeling” He decides to let go the knowing comment.

“That is quite the interesting interpretation, I take it doesn’t go well with most of your likeminded familiars” The other man scowls and looks away. He decides to backtrack since the night was supposed to be fun.

“But I can appreciate the allure of being surrounded and enjoy the fear of everyone else, I do indulge myself in a similar fashion, in fact this precise location for our dinner is very accommodating, mm yes very much so. See the woman and the man on the table opposite to ours?” Peter turns and does in fact look.

“Well the man is cheating on her and plans to break up with her to stay with his lover who just so happens to be her friend, you can imagine the amount of loneliness that poor woman is going to feel” Elias can see the other eyes following the couple with a look of hunger and something else. He chooses to give this as a light offering to Peter like a show of goodwill.

“Well quite the shame for her, but I feel like maybe later a little friendly hand could do her well” He speaks with a very chipper tone and his voice goes lower at the end sending a spike of electricity through him.

“Ah... well that certainly is a nice gesture and would not deny you the chance” He swallows at the look the other gives him, something like questioning? Before he could continue the food and drinks arrive.

While they eat, they talk or most specifically he does, Peter doesn’t say much, just like when they are on the phone, but he can tell the other is listening and responds according whenever he asks him a question. Otherwise he lets him run rampant and say anything that is on his mind, without interruption. It’s liberating to be able to do so, at one point he realizes he’s telling him a lot.

He stops a little mostly to drink some more wine and watch the other who looks quite at ease. A little peak at his mind tells him that the other is feeling content. Apparently Elias not pushing for him to elaborate or participate more is very relaxing. He quickly leaves at that doesn’t want to be noticed so soon. His cheeks getting flushed must be because of the drinks nothing else.

Eventually a few questions about Peter and his work with the Tundra, without compelling, are asked, nothing too serious, but just to make him talk a little more. He looks a little more apprehensive about it, but comes through.

When Elias was about to ask another one, they hear the sound of a little commotion, the couple he told Peter before clearly are going through what he said. The woman grabs her purse and leaves. He turns to Peter who is looking very focused on her, how could he not, she is practically an easy meal. He rolls his eyes, brushes his fingers with his to call his attention and tells him in a low voice.

“Go along, I’ll wait I can take a look anyways, to get something light to enjoy with the wine” Peter looks like he got and electric shock at the touch, but nods at him and gets up in the direction the woman left without anyone giving him a glance.

He drinks another cup of wine and finishes his meal, all while checking on his date. Ten minutes later and he is back. Elias is grinning and feeling like a kid in a candy store.

“Did you have fun?” Peter looks at him with a peculiar expression, but smiles slightly to him. Elias noticed the other rolled the sleeves of his clothes to his forearms and is currently having a very, veeery good time, he sees the other has tattoos on each one, an anchor and a ship.

“Very much so!”

“You are welcome, are we going to get dessert?”

“Didn’t you like that one that I gave you?”

“Mmm you mean the one I told you about?” When he says that Peter looks suddenly very smug, he doesn’t like it.

“Well maybe or perhaps I already prepared for this as a surprise”

“No, there is no way yo-“

“Told you no to peak to spoil yourself, thankfully you listened, if you don’t believe me just this once you can compel the truth”

“ _Did you really prepare this whole thing?”_

“As a matter of fact, yes. A few favors and an invitation to this place moved them here, I figured the only way to surprise you would be to orchestrate something that you would not expect me to do. An offering for your god as well as mine would do.”

That fucker.

“You asshole, you tricked me”

“Oh, not at all, I didn’t expect you to pick them up so fast, in fact, didn’t though your voyeuristic tendencies were that good. Thankfully you focused on their trauma and not why did they picked this place. So did I win?” He smirks and looks at him, while leaning slightly to the front. He wants to erase that smug prick smile out of his face but he really did get him.

“I suppose you did” He admits sourly. He was enjoying himself and now well.

“I’ll pay so we can go”

“I’ll wait outside then”

He grabs his coat and starts to go to the door. He waits there for five minutes until Peter finally gets out. He is holding a bag, to which he frowns but decides to look to the front and start walking back to the car. He hear the other walking to him, but in a fit of pettiness goes faster. This causes him to not notice the hole in the road that makes him pitch forward but before he goes down he feels his arm being grab to steady him. He turns around to face Peter, however now they are almost chest to chest and he has to look up to him.

His throat dries and he feels flushed by shame and the closeness with the other. Elias blinks at him dumbly and Peter is no better since he is blushing slightly with an uncomfortable look and a slight frown.

“Didn’t take you for a the sore loser kind, or is it because you don’t want to answer my question”

“A little bit of both I suppose”

“The watcher who doesn’t want to be known huh”

“The lonely one who seeks others to feel more alone, I take it you enjoyed this then” Peter looks very affronted at that.

“I did enjoy myself but i-“

“Look just ask”

“…. Fine, who are you really?”

Elias expected this question, it did not make him want to answer any more than before.

“Hmm, what do you know about the relationship between the Magnus Institute and your family?”

“Are you going to answer with a question or..”

“I have a point Peter, don’t waste my time”

“Mordechai Lukas made arrangements with Jonah Magnus to provide funding in exchange of possible victims”

“Yes, well, that and a few more things, Mordechai was a… very intense man”

“What do you…..” Peter cuts himself, blinks several times while looking at his face, and stay silent for almost 15 seconds.

“Oh”

“Yes oh, Peter, you do realize there are very few and selected people who know this right?”

Peter still looks like he is trying to wrap his head around it.

“Does Nathaniel know?”

“He is… aware let’s keep it at that, so is Simon if it makes you feel any better?”

“Not really”

Elias does notice that the other lowered his hand from grabbing his arm and is currently softly gripping his side, Peter doesn’t seem to realize he is doing it, so he touches his wrist, and like that the other eyes widen and drops his hand while looking anywhere than at him.

“Well if that is all I would appreciate a drive back to my place. Also to keep quiet about this, to keep the relationship with both parties just like usual” He is currently trying very hard not to curse.

“Yes, the car. I … have another question”

“Really, curious thing you are then” A frown from Peter and a sight.

“Don’t want to fight just-“

“What is it”

They start walking side by side then.

“Why are you different”

“What?”

“From when you were James, you were very… mm how to put it, unnerving and stiff”

“Really? When I change bodies, im still myself, but I take aspects of the original occupant, be it things like tastes in food, cigarettes, or things like personality traits. James was a very serious person, Elias is more expressive, I can eventually tone it down of course, its practice”

“Is he still…”

“No, no the process doesn’t keep them alive, so it’s just me”

“I see” He doesn’t offer anything else besides that and they walk in silence.

When they get in the car the journey like is like when they came and he just looks through the window.

Finally they arrive at his place, he’s about to go in before Peter shuffles a little and offers him the bag.

“What is it?”

“You wanted dessert”

Elias blinks grabs the bag opens it a little and sees a little cake prepared to take away.

“Thanks” He ends up murmuring.

Peter looks awkwardly at him. Elias takes pity on him.

“I had fun I’ll admit, was quite pleasant, the whole thing”

“Even the …”

“Yes even the surprise, I’ll be lying if I say I didn’t enjoy the whole ordeal”

“Oh. Well” He stands there swaying a little, he is unsure what the other is expecting so he Looks. What Peter can’t manage to convey is a desire to repeat the experience, he enjoyed himself greatly and managed to feed his god in the process too which lets him get away with this behavior.

“… I feel slightly robbed of course, maybe another wager with different prices?” He smirks at him and pats him in the chest.

Peter looks surprised than annoyed and finally amused. He gives him a more tentative smile, and god dammit he might be fucked.

“Oh? Little man wants to win huh, well that sounds fine by me, I have time before the ship leaves, you can give me the details later when you call”

Finally they both say their goodbyes and leave, Elias goes to change and in bed while trying to sleep he can’t help to grin.

Next day he gets a package with a new set of personalized pens and a card with the initials P.L He looks at them while eating the cake from last night, while on the kitchen counter appears a ring too big for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just as a side note Peter went through the 5 stages of grief in the span of 15 seconds when Elias told him the truth. That and he definitely was doing the math processing meme, you don’t drop that kind of bomb on someone and not expect them to be like, ….. What. Actually Peter’s thoughts about everything that’s happening in general are great.  
> Scream at me in the void about lonelyeyes in my [tumblr](https://p1nkwitch.tumblr.com/)


	4. Chapter 4

Their next meeting goes just as well as the first. He loses the bet again but Elias doesn’t particularly care that much, it was mostly to ensure a second date, because of that loss he got a third one where this time he won the price of getting an answer from Peter. Unfortunately the other had to go back to the Tundra for the next 3 months, but promised to take him to dinner and to pick their next gamble. Nothing of too much notice happened during that period, besides a few researches from artefact storage getting blown up by a rather unlucky incident.

Contact during that period of time became difficult, so only a call during the final week of the third month was possible. When Peter came back they kept going on their “dates” a few more times during the month and a half he could remain before sailing away again. That became their routine for the next year. Finally he won another bet regarding Simon and decided to pick the next location of their encounter, Peter despite complaining about him being a sore loser, turned into one himself.

The scowl and sulking he gave him before leaving in a cloud of fog were not charming but annoying and very hilarious, yes that was it.

After thinking it while drinking coffee in his newly appeared mug, light blue with tiny clouds and a little empty island, he decides to do something different since Peter will be going back to sea for a few months next week. Instead of going out they would enjoy a meal at his apartment where hopefully he can finally get things to escalate a little bit, he hasn’t even gotten a kiss on the mouth… _yet_.

True they don’t spend too much time together physically since the other travels for long periods of time but they have been seeing each other and speaking on the phone while he is away almost any time they have the chance. So he is confident that he will be able to make the other give him what he wants.

Elias thinks that maybe with that and the others absence for the next months he can finally just shut down any though about Peter for a while. True, Elias is having a lot more fun than in the last 20 years, but he might be overcomplicating stuff if this keeps going, they have different allegiances and eventually there will be a time where they will have to cross. So he definitely needs to sleep with the man and break up. Besides as someone following the One Alone Peter might actually find the whole thing advantageous for him.

With that in mind Elias calls Peter, the phone rings for a few seconds until it picks up.

“Hello Elias”

“Well hello to you too, I am letting you know that I picked the next location for our encounter”

“Is that so? Any restaurant in mind then?”

“Not exactly… since you will be going to sea soon, I figured a nice meal at my place as a goodbye would be nice” When he finishes he hears the other move but not answer. “Is there a problem?” Peter moves again and after a pause answers him.

“Not at all! Just not what I expected, though maybe you would have wanted to terrorize some poor unsuspecting couple or something but that is alright too” He says that rather quickly, and despite being his usual jovial tone it sounds slightly off. Now he is curious, so he is definitely getting the other to come.

“If that’s the case then, I expect you around 8 this Friday if it’s aright with you?”

“Yes, yes of course I’ll see you then Elias goodbye”

“Goodb-“ The line gets cut off before he can finish, whatever that was he is going to figure it out.

A new wave of excitement goes through him, Peter sounded clearly bothered by something and he wants to _Know_ what it is. It can’t be the date on itself, he has avoided calling it that since the first one as a manner to keep Peters discomfort at bay. It’s tied to the location, perhaps the idea of coming into his place has a connotation with too much closeness. If that is the case it would make his plan a little more complicated.

Peter hasn’t rejected any of his advances and has in fact flirted back with him, he has noticed the trend of the other to look elsewhere if he is too forward. Elias has seen him make as much space between himself and others but has let him lead him around and touch him several times without recoiling, only tensing for a few seconds maybe a minute but eventually he relaxes when he keeps it light and gives him the chance to retreat if he wants to.

He is monster but not _that_ kind of monster, he likes the way the other flushes when he locks their arms together, or when Peter brushes their fingers (He pretends not to notice it’s on purpose), his smirk when he thinks he is winning, or how about the time the wind swept a lock of his hair from its perfect place and Peter softly put it back in place while brushing his face ever so slightly, being so close to him that he wanted to lean up and ki-

So focused in that he didn’t notice the object on the floor that made him stumble, almost fall to the floor as a matter of fact, when Elias straightens and looks on the ground he actually sees a book.

For the past 3 years and a half he kept getting either, junk, clothing and some miscellaneous objects from his soulmate but not a single book.

Curiosity piqued, he went to grab it. When he saw the cover he actually laughed, a manual about dating, not even a really good one, his soulmate was probably young and desperate or very veeeery inexperienced. Amusing indeed, if it's the former it doesn't particularly bother him too much, soulmates don't necessarily have to be romantic, and since the Lost and Found process can happen at any point of your life, sometimes people with gaps in age end up paired up. Of course most people don't find each other or just don't bother. If his soulmate is simply inexperienced then well that's their business. 

Thoughtfully amused he went to prepare dinner and go through some more paperwork afterwards. He needs to approve several… special requests from the archive and hopefully make a budget that makes sense as to why they need so many flammable substances. He doesn't understand if Gertrude’s obsession with fire is mostly hers or a byproduct of her being tied to the desolation messiah.

Friday comes quickly enough. Elias is finishing putting the food in the oven and has enough time to prepare before Peter arrives. The man varies in how long he comes, usually whenever Elias starts to get mildly annoyed or upset Peter makes his appearance. So he has enough time for a quick shower and a change of clothes.

He picks the black and green flannel shirt, (he saw it and despite not being his usual type of outfit the need to get it ended up winning, he supposes it is one the original Elias particular fashion choice that he couldn't override) a black undershirt and black pants and lays them on the bed while goes to the bathroom.

It must has been 15 minutes when the doorbell ring, he just got out of the bath and did not have enough time to put his clothes on before opening.

_Seriously?! The one time he decides to come earlier??_

Elias thinks what to do but decides in the end to merely put on the personalized bathrobe Peter sent him a few months ago and go open the door. 

When he does he feels the cold from outside hit him and give him goosebumps. Elias looks up as annoyed as possible at the other man’s face when he is confronted with Peter looking like his brain shortcutted completely. 

A brief look at his head does confirm it, he has gone completely blank. Well, at least interest is there he supposes bemusedly, after a second he opens more the door to let him in.

"I know you must be used to the cold but I'm not, so if you could perhaps…?” When he talks it does the trick to snap the other out of it and make him walk inside. "I'm afraid you caught me off guard all the other times before, you took your time to appear, so I decided to take mine. If you don’t mind I’m going to change, unless of course you would prefer if I stay like th-“

“ _I would_ … I me..an I mean, go ahead I’ll wait on the couch” Peter finishes quickly and as he tries to move to the couch he brushes against Elias, his hand gives the lightest of touches to his side that he can feel very acutely with only the bathrobe.

He turns to the room too with a soft blush in his cheeks. He hopes the night goes his way so he can stop getting like this soon.

Elias feels very stupid and he doesn’t like it, he takes a breath once in inside and checks on the other through the eyes of the paintings in the Livingroom. He sees Peter grabbing his face with both hands while siting, he seems to be muttering something unintelligible, the tip of his ears and the back of his neck (that he sees from a second angle from a picture frames to the wall) are very red.

He feels something… at seeing that. But for the life of himself he can’t figure out what. He remembers the other attitude at the idea of coming here and hopes he can figure out the problem soon.

Elias dresses quickly and tries to prepare his hair like usual but it’s not working, eventually he gives up and lets it down. He does have to check on the food and his “date”

When he emerges Peter seems much more composed, he turns when he walks out, looks at him and lowers his eyes to his collarbone before changing directions to the general area of his face. He smiles wickedly at him and winks before going to the kitchen. Elias hears something that he can’t quite make out and goes to open the oven, seeing that everything is okay he proceed to get two glasses and a bottle of wine to offer the other.

“I take it you would like some?”

“Yes of course thank you”

They remain quiet for a few seconds until Peter puts the glass down.

“So you liked it”

“Excuse me?”

“The robe, wasn’t sure if it was to your Victorian taste”

He snorts “Oh yes I did like it, don’t worry, my tastes are as good as ever, otherwise you wouldn’t be here dear” Peter was taking a sip but choked slightly.

“Oh… I see”

“Mmm no you don’t but that’s ok” He smiles at him “I do appreciate the gifts much better than the ones your relatives give me to just get rid of me, or perhaps you _are_ trying to get rid of me too Mr. Lukas?

“Don’t worry Mr. Bouchard I can assure you I have no such motives”

They talk more, Peter getting less awkward and more relaxed. Eventually he goes to take out dinner from the oven and Peter tags along to help set the table. He puts the tray over and points to the other where he keeps the plates while he cuts the meat. By doing so he forgets that they are in the pantry above him, so Peter stands right behind him and leans forward putting his chest against his back to grab the objects in question.

He twitches at the contact and Peter grabs them before putting them right next to him, he… hovers and eventually puts his face next to his to take a look at the food he assumes. (He hopes he can’t hear his chest about to burst)

“Looks good didn’t take you for the cooking type honestly” He says that right next to his ear, Elias has to focus so his hand, grabbing the knife doesn’t shake. He gives a slow breath and tries to act as nonchalance as possible while feeling his ears burn too.

“Well I wasn’t but at one point you have to learn, times change and you have to be able to look after yourself on your own” He is so glad he has had so long to practice keeping it together in situations of this sort. It’s been a while but he still has it in himself.

That though crashes when Peter steps back not before chucking and brushing his lips oh so very slightly to his ear. (Was it accidentally? Was it on purpose?)

“Yes you are right after all we only ever have ourselves to truly count on don’t we?” He sounds amused and jolly just like he does every time something can be related back to Forsaken. An annoying obsession but he can be blamed of the same thing too. Doesn’t mean he will admit it.

Peter finally goes to grab the cutlery and leaves his space, giving him time to calm down and try to think something that would keep him relaxed until after dinner. He doesn’t know what is the other playing, maybe a little revenge for the robe thing, to perhaps get him flustered like he did to him. He wants to check but when he does he feels the push of forsaken blocking him. Elias knows that he can bypass it but it would be too obvious like that.

After preparing everything they sit to eat and drink more wine, all while not mentioning what happened before. A little tense on his part although Peter didn’t seem to have any problem, in fact he started to tell him about this shop he found in his last trip. Nothing truly important, Peter if not asked tends to go on tangents about things that really tell you nothing about what he was up to. He does seem to enjoy to do it to strangers it unnerves them and makes it harder for them to leave to join others effectively leaving them alone with the man.

He drinks his wine and when the bottle is done between the two of them they open another. They eat, eventually Elias tells him about Gertrude’s latest requests and having to budget and explain explosives for a researching institute. Peter honestly laughs at that and says that he only crossed path with the woman once and that she was terrifying. He completely agrees.

They talk more and when dinner is done they go to the couch to keep drinking. Eventually on what he thinks is the third bottle he has to admit he’s rather tipsy, Elias is also pretty sure Peter’s too.

At one point they ended up both leaning on each other, Elias can smell the cologne the other is using, for some reason it seems familiar somehow, he is pretty sure the other hasn’t used it before in their previous dates but he has a nagging feeling that he knows it, the pressing of beholding is there but the alcohol is not letting it trough.

He wants nothing more than to climb on top of him and kiss him.

“So… so you see the man was absolutely terrified u u know ?”

“mmh”

“And he was there, already in the lonely a perfect sacrifice”

“But?”

“But his Girlfiend came and he remembered her and LEFT!”

“Thatss the worsst”

“And I was just like why do eye bother” It took Elias a second to realize what happened but when he did he started to laugh, pressing his face against Peters shoulder.

“?” Peter looked at him questioningly

“Eye bother” He kept laughing, at that the other reacted and started to chuckle too.

“Seriously Elias”

“Yes, seriousshly, sea how you like it then captain” Peter snorts and laughs too trying to hide it from him. But ohh that won’t do, not at all. So he grabs his face with both hands and turns it around to face him. Elias is smiling.

“I’m shore someone like you can fins amushment in this” Peter grabs his hands on his face and for a second he thinks he is going to pull them away but instead just grabs his wrists then very lightly, rubbing them with his thumbs.

“Maybe or maybe I’m just out of my _depth_? Elias grins at him, he sees Peter look at his eyes than down to his mouth, and up again very slightly. He decides to just…

Elias moves his hands and lowers Peters face to his until their foreheads are touching, what he doesn’t notice is the other freezing and his eyes looking panicked, because he was too busy looking down to his mouth to try to press their lips together.

Or he would have. If Peter didn’t disappear. Elias pitches forward and falls on the couch when he gets up and looks around Peter is gone. He waits to see if the other is going to appear again. Maybe he was just messing with him, but the longer time goes by without any sign of the other, he realizes that he just left. He lies on his back and looks at the roof while feeling absolutely mortified and embarrassed.

The week goes by slowly, he called Peter but there were no signs of him. Eventually he looks at the Tundra on the day it was meant to sail, to try and see if he is there, or if the lonely maybe just ate him, he hopes it did, otherwise the man left him like that. When he catches a slight view of the other he looks back into his office and has a foul mood the entire day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here we see Elias denial going through the roof and two people having a giant misunderstanding.  
> Scream at me in the void about lonelyeyes in my [tumblr](https://p1nkwitch.tumblr.com/)


	5. Chapter 5

To say that he was annoyed would be an understatement. Elias priced himself as someone with an impeccable taste so the fact that he got tricked by Peter Lukas out of anyone was a wound to his pride. He refused to call again after seeing the other in the docks that day. Elias will not give him the satisfaction of knowing the effect he had on him. 

He realizes that he should not have let himself continue with their little games for this long and should have ended it beforehand instead of letting it escalate. His idea of just sleeping with the other and leaving was ruined and he was the one left behind in the end. It was unacceptable. 

Elias should have known it was all a plot of the other man to feed his God. It was unusual for a Lukas to use the honeypot tactic since that would imply putting effort into making someone fall for them but it's not unheard of. Several men and women since Mordechai had used it as a way to acquire spouses to keep the family line. 

He feels stupid for not seeing it and not digging into the other man’s brain harder. It was all just one big game and he just got duped. The mind of the other seemed sincere or as close as that for people like them could be. He feels slightly nauseous and like his head is going to explode. In the end Elias leaves early the Institute, alerting his secretary and heading home, hopefully an aspirin and some sleep will make him feel better.

When he arrives he sees a package in his door, he grabs it to see who sent it and when he sees it he sees red. Elias opens the door and throws the thing to the side, unfortunately whatever it is, doesn’t sound like it breaks. He goes to change, drinks water and a pill for his head and tries to sleep, but is unable to, so after two hours he gives up and goes to open the damn thing.

Without care he opens it, inside there is a dark green dress shirt with a pair of golden cufflinks with emeralds that complement the look of eyes. He is still furious, maybe even more, the man doesn’t even have the decency to at least leave him alone, ironically enough. Not only that but actually picking something he likes to what? Taunt him? Screw him.

The presents go back to the box and are put In the back of his dresser to hopefully never be seen again.

Like that he takes a breath to calm himself down and goes to order dinner, he doesn’t particularly feel like cooking too much.

A few weeks pass and he is getting progressively angrier, the man keeps sending him every few days a new gift. All of them are perfectly useful and have him in mind. _He hates it._ When the coffee machine arrived he almost calls Peter to curse him out. Elias has looked for the other man and seen him in several ports or the cities themselves, mostly at night and only by whoever managed to pay enough attention to see him.

Whatever the other is expecting he is not going to give in.

Eventually things came to a head when on a particularly bad day, Gertrude came to ask/interrogate him about some statements, he snapped and asked her if she could perhaps go back to work, his temper was at his limit.

Arriving at home it didn’t get better when he saw another box. He stared at it and despite feeling beholding enjoying the whole thing, just this once he decided to simply ignore it. Left the thing outside and went in. He managed to relax slightly until… a boat on a bottle appeared right next to him on the couch. The thing inside it resembled the Tundra.

What happened next was simple, Elias in a fit of rage, grabbed the thing belonging to his supposed soulmate and threw it against the wall smashing it to pieces.

The sound of breaking glass filled the room along with his heavy breathing. He went to the door opened it, grabbed the box and threw it to the wall too. This time it did seems as if something broke.

Grabbing a bottle of wine and the weed he had he decided to forget all about this and deal with it later. Tomorrow is a holiday so he has the weekend for himself. He intends to enjoy it and forget about Lonely captains and sea stupid soulmates.

In the morning he regrets everything. He does know what he is going to do by night so he has time to feel less like shit by then.

Finally he decides that the gifts have to stop, speaking to the other man is no go so instead, he makes a few calls, while drinking tea and relaxing, and arranges for a message to be delivered to Peter on the next port he stops by. Explaining in a very short and curt manner that he would like for him to stop. All in the most polite and businesslike manner after all he is at least a gentleman.

Later he collects the shards of glass and puts the box beneath his bed. If things go right the way he wants, he needs the place to be impeccable. Or at least the way from the living room to his bedroom.

Elias looks for his black jacket but can’t find it anywhere, once again he curses his soulmate, that thing was expensive. He picks up the green one he used in his first date with Peter. Now he can associate it with something else at least.

The night is pleasant so he goes to a bar that he knows has what he is looking for. Beholding lets him know who is looking at him and who has an interest. After a while he selects a fairly handsome man and proceed to start talking with him. They flirt and talk, he finds out the man keeps losing stuff but is not keen on finding his soulmate and that sounds perfect to him. After a few drinks an insinuations they go to his place, he isn’t looking for anything beyond one night and neither is the other. In the morning he’s gone, he… enjoyed himself yes, very much so. (It doesn’t stop the feeling of wrongness)

Elias rests for the remaining weekend. Doing chores, updating work, going out for coffee (he refuses to use the machine the other sent) and watching some tv, rinse and repeat. On Monday he is more calm than the last few weeks, and when a week and half passes and there are no more gifts or random objects appearing from thin air, he feels relieved.

Cutting off your soulmate _is_ possible with the right mindset, however it’s very frowned upon, but it’s really no one else’s business than his, whatever his soulmate thinks about it is not his problem.

After another week gone by he feels… calmer, he’s getting back to how things were before the little mistake. Elias has a few more hookups just to keep his mind occupied, but they were underwhelming so to say. At least the annual funding gala it’s going to be soon, so preparations are in need since it’s technically his second one in this body and he must make good impressions for the guests.

He hums a little tune while he prepares for the night, when he goes to look for his ties they all are where they are meant to, just like his jackets and everything else he owns. He’s rather glad for that.

When Elias goes to pick up the blue scarf, he finds the green one he lost 2 years ago in its place. It looks worn, a little frayed, like whoever wore it runned their fingers through the end a lot, mostly and anxious tic, the feeling of his gut churning it’s not pleasant, he still tries to look for the blue one but it’s nowhere to be seen.

Standing in front of his dresser he slowly goes to the bookshelf and realizes with something akin to dread that the dating manual is gone, he checks and the beanie, socks and some shells he kept as decoration are gone too.

He is still holding the scarf between his fingers when he hurries and checks under his pillow. Relief hits him like a wave, the sweater is still there, the one he got right after becoming Elias, he wears it most of the time he is at home, it is comfortable. He wonders if it would disappear the moment he is not looking at it, Elias wasn’t aware that this was a side effect of rejecting his soulmate, true he is not looking to find them but he liked being able to keep the objects. He struggles with himself but puts the cloth on the bed again, this will pass and things will be normal again, no matter what.

Taking a deep breath he grabs all the things he needs and leaves.

The sweater remains for a while but eventually it fades out in a gust of mist.

At the party he talks and charms as many people as possible so they will donate more funding, being this young has its perks. Already cataloguing any possible interested party he is surprised by the feeling of vertigo that hits him and knows that it’s Simon.

“Hello to you too Simon, could you perha-“

“Elias! I see you are doing quite well” He pats his back and the feeling of vertigo leads into weightlessness

“Si-!”

“Oh? Are you alright? You might want to seat down” Simon doesn’t go for this kind of behavior toward him unless he has personally offended: him, his god or a favorite Fairchild if the man was capable of having something like that.

He feels like he is choking while Simon grabs his arm with surprising strength for someone his size and drags him to some chairs in the side of the room. No one seems like they want to be anywhere near them.

“So how is the Institute going, good right? yes I’m glad” The older man keeps talking and Elias feels like he is falling even though he is sitting down, Beholding lets him know he is perfectly safe but it still feels like he is going down at maximum velocity. He struggles to choke the name of the other, at which the older man smiles and finally stops the attack to his senses.

He takes deep breaths.

“Wha… what was that FOR?!”

“Mmm? Oh? whatever you mean?” Simon is looking very pleased but besides that he can tell the other is more tense than usual.

“Don’t play dumb Simon it doesn’t suit you”

“On the contrary! I believe it does, however this is not about me and if anyone is trying to play dumb it might be you”

“I don’t know what you’re implying but-“ Simon tuts at him to stop and looks like he’s trying to figure out something.

“How odd”

“…. What is?”

“Saying that you don’t know, but you do, you are just denying everything like usual, if you can’t control the situation you are in, you get... antsy and try to sweep it under the rug, if it’s not there it’s not happening right? But I suppose I must be a little more forward then. Your situation with Peter”

“I can assure you there is no situation, all has been resolved”

“Ah so preoccupied with the details you can’t see the bigger picture then.”

“And you can?”

“Well im not blinded by pettiness and paranoia in the first place so I would say that yes, besides the vast is all about knowing how small you are in the grand scheme of things, so tiny problems like yours are, in the bigger scale, not really that important. In fact I say are easier to solve if you would listen” He doesn’t like his tone or what he is implying in the slightest but Elias is smart enough to know that to say anything to that, would cost him another falling incident.

“Fine, what do I need to listen then?” Simon looks delighted at his answer.

“That whatever little story you might have pictured in your head is most likely wrong and over exaggerated”

“I don’t think you understand what happened enough to judge that Simon”

“No, and the boy certainly did not tell me what happened either, but knowing him and you I can take a guess, that plus last time I saw him he was practically see through with misery, you know how it goes. Great to his god not so much for letting anything resembling a personality left, look at Nathaniel for example.” The churning of his gut at that reminder is not fun, an empty husk of a person.

“Here is what I believe happened, Peter got nervous and over reacted, he tends to do that when presented with too much social interaction, he disappears anyone that bothers him. He did it once to an ice cream seller that asked him if he wanted to buy something, right in front of me! Out of sheer disgust, he looked like he was going to break into hives.”

“I understand that It must be difficult for him, but to just ignore and leave even when I called without explanation” Simon laughs a little at that and pats him like a child In the head, thankfully without causing any vertigo.

“Of course not! You don’t tell your first crush that you got so nervous about physical proximity that you sent yourself away into another dimension out of sheer nerves and embarrassment” Elias starts to frown but blanks out at the end of the statement.

“First crush?”

“Yes? Do you really think that the scion of the house of loneliness would have any time before you to even attempt this? He was homeschooled Elias I think it’s pretty obvious.” Simon says homeschooled like it was the explanation for everything. However… he is not wrong, The Lukases aren’t exactly too outgoing and most marriages are with people carefully selected to their lifestyle. “Truly you are, besides perhaps myself, the only person he lets anywhere near” He might be an idiot.

“The gifts?”

“Dunno but I reckon it was a way to placate you? Not very keen in confrontations or communication, the lot of them, this is as close as apologies as he can get I suppose”

Elias doesn’t want to consider it because it would mean, well, that he was wrong, then again he is not the only one to blame. Neither of them were exactly forthcoming.

“I don’t know if this helps or not but I thought you might want to understand, at least before making decisions you can’t take back.”

“It’s not like it was going to last, it was just fun”

“Oh Jonah we both know that is not true, you just don’t want to face it. Anyways this is all I’m willing to do for now”

“ _Why did you really do this?”_ He might get in trouble for that but he does want to know.

“Peter is… the most enjoyable Lukas I had the pleasure to know since Mordechai, I might have a soft spot for the boy who asked me about ships and the ocean, in another life I might have taken him for the vast, it would have fitted him well too.” He doesn’t look upset as much as thoughtful.

“I… see, thank you Simon”

“You are welcome. Now talk to the boy would you” When he finishes saying that, he goes to the balcony turns to look at him winks and jumps. What a flashy bastard, but he does have a few good points.

The night continues and when its time, he goes back home. When he gets into his room the sweater is gone, he feels a pang of loss at that but ignores it. For the next couple of days he thinks, doesn’t call Peter or try to contact him in any way, Elias is still mulling if he wants to keep going or to let things go. He was preparing himself for that before but now he is not sure.

Just as he keeps avoiding doing anything, more things disappear. When he grabs his keys the keychain is gone. The mug for his coffee goes next, the last things to go are the objects he kept in the institute. Until the ring is left, he is worried that it might disappear so he puts it in a necklace and wears it, to feel its weight against his chest.

Elias looks at the object in his hands, holding it like it might disappear in any second, he chose this. To let Peter go, to reject his soulmate, neither of the decisions are making him particularly happy now….. They didn’t make him happy before. He wants things to go back, not like before he started to know the other man, in whatever capacity was possible with their games and allegiances. He misses the random objects painting a picture like puzzle of who his soulmate is, maybe they will never meet but it was fun, even at the expense of his own things.

He decides to call Peter in the night, if anything to make things clear and if the other refuses well, at least he tried. As for his soulmate, he honestly doesn’t know, beholding doesn’t seem to have any idea about how to fix that particular issue. Putting the ring back in place he grabs he settles to work.

Inside the drawer, a shell appears.

Hours later at home he calls and waits, after the fifth ring he is about to hang before the call comes through.

“Hello Mr. Bouchard” He can’t believe how happy hearing Peters dry tone makes him. That should tell him so much.

“Hello Peter” Elias might try to make things right, but it doesn’t mean he is going to make it easy.

“Oh? First name basis, I thought we were supposed to be professional from now on” the comment stings but its true.

“Yes, I.. had time to think and I came to the conclusion that, I might have sent you the message while misinterpreting information and so, not being in the right positions make the correct call” He hears the other sight and a shuffle.

“And what was that misinformation then?” Elias hesitates, this might still be a setup, maybe Simon was in it too and just wanted him to... No, Simon is, despite many faults, a very straight forward person and this is not the kind of stuff that he would do.

“…. That it was all a set up from the beginning and you left just to feed on my misery” There he said it. “Also the gifts were a way to taunt me.”

He is sure that he could hear a pin drop from the silence that just came.

“You”

“Yes Peter”

“Really?”

“Listen, it’s not exactly something that your relatives aren’t known to do from time to time I heard the gossip ok?” This is going to get out of control. He thinks he hears the other choke slightly trying to cover a laugh at his expense. He narrows his eyes. “I’m not the one to blame for this on the first place, mister I leave when I’m about to get kissed. Also I tried calling you before you left but you wouldn’t take any of my calls so if anything it’s on you.”

“I might have overreacted”

“Yes I noticed, but _why didn’t you called_ ”

“Because I didn’t want you to compel me to tell you why I left. Elias I will hang up if-“

“ _Why did you leave?_ You owe me at least this Peter Lukas _”_

“Because I got nervous when you tried to kiss me, I haven’t done this before and I never wanted to do it, physical contact is disgusting. People are annoying and demanding, you are too but it’s in a way I can actually tolerate eve… even like.” He cuts off in the last part. Before he hangs up, because he knows him enough to tell he is.

“I wanted to break up with you after we got physical because you are the first person in almost 150 years that I can actually enjoy being around and its terrifying…. I like when you are here, and when you leave I want to know what you do, because I can’t help being like that.”

When he is done there is an awkward pause.

“I see..”

“What I meant is-“

Silence again.

“I would like for us to go back to how things were before this whole issue, if physical contact bothers you I’ll limit myself, I enjoy your company regardless of any of that so if its-“

“I would like to try” Elias hesitates

“I don’t want to bother you if that’s not-“

“Elias I’m going to say this once and _never_ repeat myself again ok?”

“Yes” He hears him take a deep breath.

“I have never felt the need to get close to anyone, physical contact with people… displeases me. Simon is an exception on his own right. But you, I don’t mind and…..” He stops there “I did want to back then to... kiss, very much so, maybe more and that, well that never happened before” He is rarely struck speechless, but Peter does manage to do that.

“Then I would love to meet up again, when you come back, you can pick the place maybe a bet to accompany it. I have been rather bored this couple of months”

“That sounds good to me, did you miss me?” He sounds so smug. But just this once… Elias answers truthfully.

“I did, tried to forget you by a lot of means, I was very lonely dear” Elias practically purrs the last part on the phone, what can he say? He missed teasing him, so sue him.

“I uhhh” Maybe a little too much too soon? “What I mean is good, that is good”

“Mm well I will have to leave you now, but I’ll call you in the weekend to arrange our next meeting”

“Perfect, well then Elias speak to you soon”

“Likewise good night dear”

“…. You too” Hi smiles and hangs up, a flush comes to his face, well there is that.

Elias wonders now if he can solve the other issue with his soulmate when he goes to the living room and sees the sweater on the couch. Not only that but the scarf too.

He blinks and goes to his room, checks the wardrobe but his green scarf is gone again. He grins at that, well at least he doesn’t have to worry anymore. Elias goes to the kitchen while a snow glove with what looks like a beach with a seagull appears in his bed. On the kitchen counter his mug and keychain await him.

Today he thinks, while holding the cup and looking at it fondly, is a really good day. Afterwards for the first time in months sleep comes very easily.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Context if someone didn’t catch it: things disappear because Elias is literally cutting off Peter from him. If he tried to cut off his soulmate without having met them it wouldn’t work. He doesn’t know that of course. Beholding by proxy of being a fear god doesn’t know shit about soulmates so it can’t answer any of his questions.  
> Scream at me in the void about lonelyeyes in my [tumblr](https://p1nkwitch.tumblr.com/)


	6. Chapter 6

During the weekend a short call to arrange their meeting for the next month was made. A simple dinner at a restaurant is what they choose, along with a bet about the fate of some researchers in the institute that have to deal with an artifact related theorically, to the stranger, Peter claims the thing is from the flesh for some reason. It was neutral ground they decided to reach after their fight.

Elias was perfectly fine with that, and the preceding month was much more enjoyable. Peter sent this time only one gift to him, in this case a very nice wrist watch. He decided to start using the ones he got before, since now that he realized they were not meant as a taunt to his person, he could enjoy them to his heart content. The most appreciated one was the coffee machine although the dress shirt and cufflinks were close behind. He decided to wear them on their date, Elias tried them on and they fitted him perfectly.

It had been a while since he got pampered like this, more often than not it was a way to buy his favor or to thank him for his services. As James that didn’t happened since people mostly gave him things to keep him happy and get rid of his interference. Except a few exceptions.

In a case of curiosity he went for the box he threw in his fit of rage to see what was it that got broken. Inside there was a very nice but cracked mug, the wrapping bubbles seem to have saved it from shattering it completely however it had a crack on the side. The thing that got him and actually startled a laugh out of him was the picture in the center of a yellow owl, similar to the one that represents the institute, with the word kn ** _owl_** edge.

Oh he loves it.

He hates that he broke it.

He is never going to tell Peter that it actually made him laugh. He has a reputation, and puns are not something that it’s going to ruin it. Although he should pay the other back in kind, he did seem to enjoy the sea puns he did last time.

Elias can’t use it to drink but he does have an idea. He takes it to his office and proceeds to use it as a pen holder, making sure that the image of it doesn’t face the door so no one can see it clearly. That way it doesn’t go to waste.

Weeks pass and Peter returns, they go to the restaurant and enjoy a meal, things were a little tense, the same familiarity from before became slightly tilted from its axis, but it was their first outing.

Elias thinks hard and decides to change his approach. He knows Peter is interested so that is not the issue, the man admitted to not mind their physical contact, however Elias himself is the one that initiates all of it. So, he will let him do it at his own pace, not only should it made the last incident not happen again but, and he can be generous when he wants, the sting of rejection that would give him, should feed Forsaken.

He hates feeding the other god but sacrifices must be made if they want to keep this whole affair working.

Their second date was to the docks where the Tundra resided to do some people watching and perhaps enjoy a different type of meal. The man who they choose didn’t know what hit him with their combined efforts.

When he turns, after watching the whole thing go down, elated with a slight flush caused with the combination of the cold air and the excitement, he sees Peter looking at him with a very hungry look, he feels himself vibrating with energy, but…. He turns to the front and starts walking. After a second he hears the others footsteps following.

“That was lovely wasn’t it? The pure fear and dread poor Michael felt, mmm yes delightful”

“I would say so” Peter walks next to him, Elias can tell his intention with a brush of beholding and proceed to put his hands in the pockets of his jacket. Peter awkwardly aborted movement tells him he was correct. A slight smirk brushes his lips.

“Well it was fun but I do need to be going now. As it turns out, unfortunately, you were right about the outcome of the bet. The jack in the box was in fact, for some reason, related to the flesh and it hmm how to put it mildly?” He stokes his chin as in though “Stole one of the researchers kidneys. Now, I have not been able to figure how that happened _yet_ but I will _,_ still, paperwork to be done, until next time then?” While he speaks, at first, Peter starts scowling, then he looks neutrally at him and finally stares at him with a blank face contrasting his jovial tone.

“Ah I see, so I guess this means I win then, remind me what was the price?” Peter gives him a colder smile, with the wind softly rustling his hair and looking directly at him accompanied by a wisp of fog surrounding him. Elias can’t help but think how beautiful he looks, like he came out from a gothic horror novel. He manages to keep his smile in check when he answers.

“Oh yes that, if I recall this time it was a favor so whenever you think of something let me know” He turns and starts walking to his car. The sound of interference becomes strong. But he just keeps going. He is going to win this particular game of theirs.

They go on 3 more dates and Elias makes sure to keep going with his plan, he gives the bare minimum of contact and keeps to himself, when he sees the other attempt at touching him, he finds perfectly valid ways to cut him off. Watching the growing frustration and hunger in the other is so empowering and delightful. To make him chase him, which goes against his nature, and at the same time give him the respite of the sting of rejection, what a delight, carrot and stick what a wonderful method.

After their technically fourth date he calls Peter and asks where can they meet again.

“So any ideas or should I just start planning myself?” Peter snorts, he can hear him walking and moving things in what he assumes is a kitchen (?)

“Just so you can make some sort of byzantine plan to out due me? No need, I have decided, I myself have an apartment and would like you to come along for dinner”

“Really? I honestly though you lived in the Tundra whenever you came on land” He keeps it light and teases the other, truly he is surprised but the burning curiosity he feels about this place wins him out.

“Yes, as… enticing as that would be, an apartment to at least put my stuff is needed”

“If that’s the case then, I’ll try not to step on whatever you may hoard”

“Please if anyone hoards it’s you little man, I have seen your office and house” Why does everyone keep saying that he does not hoard…..

 _He doesn’t_ ….

Maybe he likes to keep some valuable memories?

Anyways.

“I resent that, I bet your place looks like you just moved in, the most spartan of looks possible” Peter abstains to make a comment which means he is _right._ He grins.

“I’ll give you the address will you please stop now?”

“Sure sure”

With the address written down Elias can’t help but hope this dinner doesn’t end like the other one.

Two days later he is standing in front of Peter’s apartment with a bottle of wine, he decided to be fashionably late by 20 minutes since it has become a custom for both of them. After a minute the door opens, Peter is standing there in a simple blue sweater and a pair of dark gray pants. His hair is slightly messy almost like he runned his hands through it.

“Well Hello there, I came baring gifts” Elias shows him the bottle.

“Perfect then, it will go well with dinner” He opens the door to let him in. Elias hangs his jacket and looks around, just like he said the place looked practically unlived. The white, grey and blue colors gave it a clinical look that did not help, it was spacious or at least gave the feeling of it, truly a lonely place.

“I see I was right in my assessment about the place, it looks very empty” He looks at Peter who walks to what he assumes is the kitchen, and the man shrugs.

“Considering how little time I spent here, there is really no need to make it homely, besides it would be unnatural for me to do so” Elias looks around and has already thought at least 10 changes he can make to use the space better and decorate it to his liking, with the right furniture it could look splendid.

“I could certainly decorate this place far better then what it currently looks like”

“Maybe if I wanted a more antique look sure, you do seem to have a thing for mixing trends, something related to your age?” He sees him smirk and can tell is in jest so Elias lets it go.

“Not everyone can be as uncaring about their interior design as your lot dear, Mordechai certainly didn’t live this frugally, I don’t know why his descendants got it into them to use as little furniture as possible” Peter nods along and scoff at that a little.

“You seem to have _known_ him” He says know with the disgust of someone who stepped on a bug without shoes.

“In a… in a manner of speaking” He sweats, he’s pretty sure he shouldn’t mention their actual relationship, not in a date. “Still not really, he was very closed off and serious so knowing him wasn’t actually possible” Peter seems to mull it over and accept it, he does look a little suspicions but looks like he will drop the conversation at that.

“Anyways need any help?”

“No need, it’s still cooking so if you want we can open a bottle of wine. Let’s save the one you got for dinner.”

The other man walks right next to him even though he has space to reach what he assumes is the place where the wine is kept, and brushes their sides. Elias moves to let him through.

“Grab the opener from the second drawer if you don’t mind”

He goes and finds it, the other man passes him the bottle and touches their fingers slightly but Elias immediately retreats his. Nope not gonna happen, not even if he wants to grab the others hands or run his fingers through his hair or… nOt HeLPIng. He snaps himself out of it and opens it.

“Hero you go”

“Yes…” The taller man gives him two glasses and goes to the living room. When he finishes pouring he goes and sits. The damn things are really unused and offer no comfort. Peter seems to have just realized that while looking at his face and looks sheepish.

“Honestly forgot”

“Truly a mastermind in decoration, I get not wanting to be homely but something useful on principal doesn’t hurt”

Peter rolls his eyes, Elias decides to start telling him about the institute and some statement givers that had a brush with the lonely for future reference. Peter seems pleased and starts talking, even if not about anything truly important but he does. Elias has learnt to just let him be, the hassle of trying to drag concise information from him too much to try now.

The other moves oh so very slowly, and he may think sneakily, closer to him but Elias takes notice and moves away on the excuse of how uncomfortable the cushions are. He questions how is dinner going and when Peter gets up to check he swears he heard him muttering about the stupid couch, so Elias tries not to chuckle at his expense.

Dinner is almost done, so they set the table, and if Peter tries to get closer to him like in their date at his house, Elias manages to rebuff any attempt magnificently. Food is delicious, some fish very nicely cooked.

They practically don’t talk but it’s not uncomfortable, more like simple and quiet companionship. The first bottle of wine is done, so they open the second one he brought and keep drinking. After they finish dinner they do start talking again about, work, sacrifices and some acquaintances. Apparently they both know Salesa.

“Fun to have bets with, since he has quite the catalogue of cursed objects lying around”

“Oh should I be concerned you have another gambling partner?” He flutters his eyelashes at him in a sickeningly sweet voice. Peter looks completely calm while he responds.

“Well of I don’t take offense for you having done my late great grandfather, I don’t see why you should” He sips his wine, while Elias chokes on his.

“That- coff- you see-“

“I really don’t care, little man” He says that and by beholding he does as a matter of fact seem to care, but not for the reason he assumes.

“I can assure you that my interest is because of you and has nothing to do with Mordechai, you honestly couldn’t be two more different people and I’m really glad for that”

“I don’t like it when you do that”

“Do what?”

“The knowing thing, Elias”

“Mm well did you want to tell me yourself?”

“… No”

“Like this its.. easier to know what you mean, otherwise I dont-“

“You don’t know and you don’t like it”

“Exactly”

They stay quiet for a little and eventually decide to move to the thing posing as a couch. Conversation picks up again a little awkwardly but pulls trough with a little more wine.

After another hour and a half they lightly tipsy. Elias still tries to figure out a way to sit that is more comfortable so he keeps fidgeting, much to Peter dismay who keeps trying and thinking rather loudly about just wrangling him at this point.

He honestly can’t help it this time the thing is bloody annoying.

“Could you stop doing that? you are starting to get me dizzy” Peter looks him with an affronted look.

“I would if this wasn’t a _block of rock_! How can you sit like that?”

“I don’t really mind”

“I can tell Peter” He says it with the driest tone, Peter narrows his eyes at him.

“I think” he starts slowly, like he would spook him otherwise “That I have an idea if you don’t mind me trying?” Elias frowns and is about to check what the other means when the Peter quickly grabs his wrist and pulls him into his lap.

Elias struggles obviously.

“WHa-“

“Can you stop flailing, you are going to hit me”

“Well maybe I should! What do you think you are doing??”

“Helping you to keep still?” He answers in the smuggest way possible and it’s infuriating.

“I did not ask you too”

“No but you clearly needed it so if you could shut up and sit right maybe this won’t be so bad” He doesn’t like his tone so he turns to look at him and sees the flushed state the other is, while avoiding looking at his face. Elias stops moving and blushes on his own, so he turns around and sits stiffly between Peters legs with his back against his chest like a seat.

They sat like that for a few minutes and eventually Elias decides to just give up on this. So he presses his back against Peter and relaxes as much as he can. The other man, stiffens, but eventually little by little unwinds. Silence.

Elias remains unmoving and lets the other do… whatever is it that he wants. Since do it himself ended up so badly its Peters turn. If there is a repeat of last time maybe they honestly should stop, since it clearly won’t work. (Even if he thinks that, he knows he can’t)

Slowly and very deliberately Peter wraps his arms around his middle. Softly because it feels right he has to ask.

“ _How much until you have to disappear into the fog for this?”_ He feels Peter clenching his jaw but eventually seems to relent.

“Won’t have to today” He shifts very slowly and presses against him more firmly. He hears a shuddered breath.

“ _How come?”_ Peter leans forward wrapping himself against Elias more while pressing his face in the crook of his neck. Elias freezes and

Oh

_Oh_

Realization hits him and well, he really can’t finish things can’t he? He wants to know this man so very thoughtfully and completely, until there is truly nothing really left for him to know. Love is something he did not expect to feel again.

A very light press of the lips against his neck has him sighing and shuddering.

“The ache of loneliness I will get when I go away and remember this will be enough” He says it so softly almost like a confession, and it is.

He wants all the time Peter has and has to fight with Forsaken all the way for it…. It is truly the only way for them and he decides to accept it. For now at least.

“Mmm I see” The other nuzzles him. Like dog almost, the comparasition makes him smile.

“Peter?” He feels more than hears the sight against his skin. And the pure want and slight adoration it gives him hits him like a wave.

“Yes?”

“…. Would you?” He does seems to grasp what he means, at least this cue he gets. He takes a breath and kisses his neck slowly until he reaches his jaw. There he stops, a second of hesitation before, nipping and kissing him. Elias skin feels on fire, like he was a follower of the desolation and he was molten wax.

Slowly as to not separate them, he tries to turn and straddle the other, a little difficult but Peter releases him enough to do it. So they are face to face and the other man goes straight back to kissing his face. Antagonizingly slow, making sure to kiss and bite whenever he felt like, but not touching his mouth yet. He sighs and bites his lips to stop making noise, but that seems to be the thing that spurns the other into going for his mouth.

The moment they lock lips the fight is over, Peter does it hesitantly, and if he understood correctly this is the first time he does this so Elias puts his arms on the other shoulders and starts to lead him.

Biting the other lower lip, so when Peter opens his mouth, Elias can deepen their kiss. Peter makes a noise and oh, _oh_ he wants to hear _that_ again and again, to commit it to memory. So he plays with his tongue, caresses his face shoulders anything he can get his hands into. Manages to sneak his hands inside his sweater and shirt and starts touching him _more_.

Peter seems to catch on and with the hands that were on his hips he starts to feel him up. He sneaks his, cold, hands into his shirt, and that makes him shiver and moan a little too. The taller one seems to like that too, so he keeps going with one hand reaching closer to his chest and the other to his belt.

They both stop and breathe, keeping each other hands still. Peter smirks slightly and goes to his neck and bites. He startles but ends up moaning as he proceed to kiss and suck on the spot greedily. When Peter is satisfied he lets him go and kisses him softly almost a peck on the lips.

“Would you-“

“Can we- “ Elias looks at him for a few seconds and leans forward to kiss him again. He uses one of his hands to run it through his hair and as he though it is very soft.

He wants to run his hands over and over against it very much right now.

“Maybe” he manages to say between bites and moans “We should take this somewhere else Pe- Ah” Elias gasps and presses himself to the other.

“Couldn’t agree more”

Before he disentangles himself, Peter lifts him effortless and start walking with him to his room. And _oh dear_ he certainly is having lots of ideas with this particular feat.

With both of them distracted neither notices the book about philosophy that appears on the almost empty bookshelf, If Elias did he would have realized it was the one he had been looking for the past few days.

In Elias apartment the pair of gloves that Peter had been looking for appeared on top of the other mans bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok people now that this part of the story is done we are going to start with more progressive time jumps. So this can move forward to the more present story. If you enjoyed it leave a comment to feed my soul. Also thanks to everyone who commented already you guys brighten my day so much holy shit. <3 <3  
> Scream at me in the void about lonelyeyes in my [tumblr](https://p1nkwitch.tumblr.com/)


	7. Chapter 7

Elias is in his office checking a few details before leaving and preparing for New Year’s Eve. Peter didn’t tell him if he was coming which doesn’t surprise him but would had been nice to be informed.

He is aware that the feeling of closeness this day brings makes the other uneasy, even more so now since it’s going to be a new millennium and people are already preparing to celebrate. There are of course those paranoid about the change and he enjoys finding them to add fuel to their paranoia.

Done with everything, he grabs his keys and leaves. Peter and him had been together for 3 years, of course if one were to count the amount of time they actually spent together physically it’s wouldn’t reach a year, but as a relationship they have managed.

On the drive to Peter’s apartment, he pick up some cake for himself and a few pastries for the next day. He says Peter’s but unfortunately for the other man, the moment he offered Elias a key he lost the place. The expression on his face when he came back and saw the apartment, almost walking out, thinking that he went into the wrong place, will be forever seared into his mind. It wasn’t until he saw Elias coming to the Livingroom in his bathrobe with a glass of wine that he realized what happened.

Peter tried to be upset but he clearly didn’t care too much about the place itself so he rolled his eyes at him and let him be. Elias was very pleased with that and gave him a very enjoyable reward…

He did keep his old apartment, in case things go awry between them, and to give the other man space since that is something he still needs from time to time.

Before he gets there he knows Peter is as a matter of fact in the apartment, Elias uses the pictures on the wall and see him asleep lying on the new couch. The first thing he did when he got the place was get rid of the awful one and buy an actual usable one.

When he arrives he leaves all of his stuff quietly and changes to the comfiest sweater he stole from Peter and a pair of sweatpants.

No one will ever see him wearing this and make it out alive, Peter is an outlier and should not be counted. Sneakily he goes to where the other man is lying down and proceeds to drape himself all over him. He startles the other but when he realizes its him he relaxes and puts his hands on his back. Elias raises his head slightly to look at him.

“Hello there Peter”

“Hi Elias, comfortable I take it?”

“Mm very much so, didn’t think you would come” He brushes the others mind to check and sees that his crew would rather spend the New Year back home. Refusing them when all of them wanted to, would cause too many complications and interactions that are not worth it.

“Crew got antsy so here we are”

“Well nice of you to show up, I got cake”

“All for yourself I assume my little siren?” He smirks at him, Elias pouts at that.

“Told you to stop with the nicknames dear, also yes”

“What a little glutton you are, cake and suffering. I take it you already found some poor idiots on your way here to stalk?” While he says that, one of his hands sneak inside his shirt and starts to touch him.

“Ah- well how could I deny myself of good entertainment and some-“ He shivers a little ”Some cake from that bakery I like” Elias bites his lip and puts his face in the crook of Peters neck. The other laughs a little and stops his movements. He doesn’t whine but does give a little sight.

“I’m glad, thought you might have missed me”

“Not in a million years sailor” He nips at the other neck after saying that. Admitting his disappointment if Peter didn’t come, would be a loss to forsaken, and he refuses to fall that low. Elias tangles their legs and slides to the side to put his head on the other chest and be able to see the tv.

“Very comfortable I see, we will need to get up to eat eventually you know?”

“Yes, but not in a while now so shush be a good pillow and let me watch.” Peter chuckles at him but stays quiet, the fact he ignores him completely and uses him as nothing more than a glorified pillow is, as matter of fact calming to both of them. Elias, if he feels too restless, checks on the other man’s thoughts and usually Peter seems to be in such a serene state that Elias gets caught up on it and falls asleep better.

They spend the next few hours lazing around and do in fact fall asleep. Elias wakes up to the smell of food and a cold space where Peter was.

He rubs his eyes and goes to the kitchen, Peter laughs at his face and shakes his head while putting the food on the plates.

Elias scowls but helps, they end up eating in relative silence, while some people outside make noise of celebration. When the food is gone, Peter ushers him to the couch and washes the plates, he hears him go to their room and stay there for a while before coming back with a blanket. Elias grabbed his cake and left two glasses for the champagne in the coffe table.

Peter sits next to him and offers the blanket.

“I did not see this coming”

“Sitting in a couch watching the telly?”

“No, making it to the new millennium, well at least I didn’t expect it back then.”

“Ah is this about your age? Finally having that midlife crisis?” The teasing tone gives away how Peter does not mean any offense. He snorts.

“You wish, I unlike most others made it here, it’s something to celebrate”

“Well Simon proba-“He gives such an unimpressed look to the other man he cuts himself.

“Simon doesn’t count, he doesn’t have to do anything beyond exist, I have to make an eff-” Peter tries to hide a smile and ends up kissing him to shut him up, he narrows his eyes but lets it go, maybe he will nag at him later.

They spend quite the while making out but eventually they have to break apart. Elias knows that it’s only fifteen minutes before midnight so he pours champagne and eats some cake. Feeling in a good mood, he offers a few bites to the other.

When its only five minutes before midnight Peter turns at him.

“Elias?”

“Yes?” He says that distractedly, watching a boy entering a door that wasn’t there a few blocks away.

“Remember the bet about the Flesh jack box?”

It takes a while for him to figure out what he means, when he does he answers cautiously.

“Yes, I recalled you won a favor, did you have something in mind?” Here’s the thing, Elias is currently trying to see what the other plans is but forsaken is blocking it. In any other moment he would have though the other man planned to do something regarding their night activities like with other bets but the fact he never used that favor and is bringing it up now is suspicious/alarming.

Peter is no longer looking at him, but looking to the front and playing with the blanket in the tic Elias realizes he has when he is nervous. He tends to get his clothes frayed with that particular action, it should not be as endearing.

“Well I have decided the favor now”

Countdown is to 2 minutes.

“Yeah what is it?”

The other man takes a breath looks up and with his left hand grabs a folded piece of paper from his pocket and gives it to him looking expectantly.

Elias is more baffled at this point rather than worried so he grabs the paper, stares at it and eventually starts to open it.

“I… will like you to sign it”

When he is done opening, he has to read what it says three times before his mind actually picks up the meaning and proceeds to blank out.

“Elias?”

He looks up at the other at hearing his name.

“What?” Peter looks like he is about to bolt or disappear forever in the fog at any moment. So he backpedals a little. “Are you really asking me to…?”

“Yes” He looks so uncomfortable is hilarious. Actually he thinks, he might be laughing. Peter looks practically see trough or like a watercolor painting that is losing its color.

He manages to choke between laughter and what he refuses to admit might be tears a very simple…

15 seconds before midnight.

“Yes, give me a pen”

The other looks so startled that he comes back into focus immediately.

5 seconds

“Oh, OH yes a pen” He pats his pocket and procures a very fancy one just for him.

0 seconds

“I also think you are missing something, Happy New Year’s Peter”

Peter looks at him grins and kisses him until he is breathless.

“Happy New Year Mr Bouchard, also” He takes something else form his pocket and puts it in his hand.

The box is a beautiful green color with golden details. When he opens it, the wedding ring with the emerald and patterned waves stares at him. Elias grabs the paper and signs next to his name. It is a piece of regular paper, nothing legal at all, but it does say marriage certificate of Elias Bouchard and Peter Lukas in the other man’s writing.

“ _My husband_ dear” _Oh he likes the sound of that._ The other already looks like he wants to take it back so Elias grabs the piece of paper and intends to keep it for safety reasons obviously.

“If you say that in alouded to call you my beautiful siren”

“Will shall see, now where is your ring?”

Peter takes off a necklaces from his neck that has a ring hanging from it. When he looks at him questioningly the other looks sheepish.

“It’s so I don’t lose it, don’t want whoever is my soulmate to have the wrong impression”

Elias stops for a second, Peter never mentioned a soulmate before, but it’s very likely that the man has been getting rid of whatever he gets from them. Elias keeps all the things from his, so to complain would be unreasonable, and besides, he smirks and goes to straddle the other. He is the one who got asked to marry this man. Peters ring has a blue sapphire and, this gives him a shock of electricity, a single eye carved to the side.

“Good” The rest of the night is a blur.

During the next eight years, things remained the same, or mostly.

Elias enjoyed calling Peter his husband far too much and Peter put up with it, but would occasionally repeat the gesture to him (Elias _knew_ he liked it too but would never say it). They did develop something of a game besides their gambling, partially to amuse him and partially to feed forsaken.

On their fridge there is a piece of paper with a very bad done spread sheet, almost as if the one who did it didn’t know how to use a computer, holding on by dear life with two magnets of a ship and an owl, with a list of divorces signed by them and the reason behind each one. Along with every new marriage. Peter of course gave him a new ring each time.

So far there were three.

First one said my husband forgot our anniversary and sent away an employee to another dimension.

Second one, my husband forced me to attend to a Christmas party and made me socialize because he was offended with my outfit.

And the third one, he embarrassed me for the last time at the annual party. They haven’t signed their new marriage yet.

Not because Elias didn’t want to, but apparently the other was very busy Elias, I have things to do Elias, my family requires my help Elias.

Ugh.

Besides that particular issue, he realized that the amount of things that appear from his soulmate has gone down, he still get the occasional thing in his office and at his apartment but not that much anymore.

At the office he starts working and things go rather well until lunch. He gets his food and the newspaper, he was about to eat before he had to stop. On the first page the news of the loneliest building stared at him right back almost as if to mock him.

He is aware of Gertrude’s actions towards rituals but this? He thinks blowing it up would had been kinder. Elias feels cold, he gets up and goes to the archives, when Rosie sees him she seems to pale. By the time he arrives he feels like he is going to punch someone for several reasons. Be it Gertrude, Peter or even Nathaniel he hast decided yet.

The little spider is the one who sees him.

“Elias! What are you doi-!”

“Ms Harvey I recommend you guide me to Gertrude” He walks calmly and reaches at her hair “Should be more careful, you got a web there” She blanches and leads him to the woman in question.

“Getrude”

“Elias”

Emma hesitates, but with a very cold smiles he dismisses her.

“Don’t scare them off El-“

“Getrude you have been doing a marvelous job at stopping ritual, not so much as an archivist but I will let that go for now. Informing me about your plans regarding rituals should be a priority”

“I take it you read the paper then”

“Yes, the Lukases are assets to the institute, this behavior can, and will, impact our relationship and funding”

“Is that so?”

“What do you-“

“I thought you were more worried about your little… partner in crime”

“I can assure you I don’t know what you mean”

“Mm well if that’s the case. I did use a pen name for informing the authorities, you shouldn’t get into trouble with the others, plausible deniability and all that”

They remain silent and stare at each other.

“I see.”

“If that is all, I have things to do”

Elias asks

“ _Is he dead_?”

“No as far as I know, if his deity took matter into their own hands it’s no longer my problem, goodbye Elias” Smug insufferable woman. He almost sees red but turns around and leaves.

Doesn’t notice the speculative look she gives him.

When he goes back to his office he starts pacing. Calling Nathaniel would be as pointless as speaking with Gertrude. He uses Beholding to try and see Peter, but he gets hit with a wall so fast it leaves him dizzy and makes him sit down.

Clearly, the other is stuck. He never told him of a ritual and they are currently “divorced” he should just let it be and cut his losses. Make it up to Nathaniel or Conrad….

He can’t even entertain the though.

He grabs his face and takes a breath to try and think. He feels something in his leg, that wasn’t there, when he removes his hands he sees the necklace with their wedding rings that Peter always uses on the pretext of not losing it to whoever is his soulmate.

What?

Why is it…?

Oh

Ohh

OHHHH

!!!!!

He is an idiot, an official idiot, he’s never going to live this down.

Now he understand why there were few things appearing. It’s not that he found less objects, it’s just that he spends more time in their shared apartment, that any object that appeared he correctly assumed belonged to Peter, he just didn’t make the connection that they were his soulmates.

He grabs the rings in his hand and after hesitating he gets up and picks up his things to leave early, there weren’t any meetings or anything important to do today. He tells Rosie there was an emergency and he needs to leave. But before that, he goes to artifact storage and grabs a box to take with him.

He goes to his apartment to grab the final thing, in his room he pick up and wears the sweater. The one that appeared when he became Elias, now that he realized he can tell it belonged to the other, it’s his size and typical style, he even connects the smell of cologne from so long ago to the one Peter wears.

God he is never going to tell anyone this.

Besides that he also grabs the blue scarf and gloves. Once he is done he grabs the box and opens it, inside there’s a locket that belonged to a woman who lost her husband and daughter on an accident. It has their pictures inside, but the important thing, the one that matters is the fact that the woman used it last before disappearing into the fog, not only her but all the other people who wore it too, until it was brought to the Institute.

Armed with Peter’s belongings and the locket, Elias put it on and waits. Soon enough he can feel the tall tale sound of Forsaken and the cold fog surround him, he focuses.

When he can no longer hear any sound from outside he gets up. He walks through the house, colder than usual and looks. There is no sign of his ex-husband. Elias walks outside and starts to go to the direction of their shared apartment. Usually, walking will never get him there fast, but Forsaken doesn’t work like that.

He holds the rings in his hand, breathes in the scarf and keeps going. After an undermined amount of time he reaches the apartment building.

Elias knows that if he stops, if he doesn’t hold on or lets beholding guide him, he would never get out. The cold is already seeping into his bones. Memories of watching Barnabas, sweet, wonderful Barnabas waste away come to him. He doesn’t regret just letting it happened back then, still doesn’t mean the loss didn’t hurt.

Mordechai had a fondness for Barnabas and yet he let him rot, just like him, he could not blame him.

He slows and stands in front of the door, he… why is he here. Peter is temporary. Eventually he will die, his own stupidity landed him here on the first place. Elias will, on the other hand, become the king of a ruined world and live forever. It’s all he has ever wanted.

The throne for himself.

He takes a breath, his hand starts to unclench and the necklace starts to slide out of it…

But

Why would he have to spend the time until then on his own?

Grabbing more firmly the object he enters.

Inside he can’t see Peter, but straining beholding a little seems to tell him there is something in the room.

When he gets there he sees the other sleeping, pale, even more than usual, but at least not a pile of bones yet.

Elias takes off the lonely locket and puts it in the bedside table.

Watches Peter and with a sight goes to where he is and in the most natural way after so much time, crawls on top of him and rests his head on his chest. His heartbeat is slow but still there at least.

“Peter“ The other doesn’t stir.

“Peteeeer”

“C’mon dear if you don’t wake up I will start a charity on your name for depressed people, it will cheer them up and make the whole community feel better, you don’t want that don’t you big man?” At that he seems to twitch.

“Really? Ok, let’s see. The Peter Lukas foundation for those lost at sea, the Peter Lukas home for the depressed youth, want me to keep going?”

“Mnmg”

“How about this then?” Elias kisses him, the other man’s beard has gotten longer, when this is done he will be shaving. Slowly, he bites and kisses his lip and jaw, one hand goes under his shirt and starts to caress his stomach. There is definitely a body twitch at that. Elias stops, looks at Peter and talks.

“Peter, you probably won’t remember this later so I’m going to say it just this once ok?”

Peter seems awake but not completely

“I… I love you, you are my soulmate against all odds. And despite our differences” He bites his lip but continues “I love to spend time with you, you are annoying, petty and honestly sometimes I want to punch your smug face, and yes there is a but. But you also understand me and let me be the way I am even if it should go against everything you are and believe” The air is getting warmer and the fog seems to dissipate.

“You let me scan your head, or well not let, but you grumble and just pretend it is fastidious. And when I say that you are completely different to Mordechai I meant it. I would never have married him let alone be happy, yet here we are.”

“So let go back dear, you can go to the Tundra for as long as you need later and I will mock you for losing to the news for a long while don’t worry”

The room has no more fog and when he hears the cars outside knows that he made it. Elias puts the necklace with the rings on the bedside table and pushes the locket to the floor like a fastidious cat.

He stares at the other man, until Peter moves and topples him to the side, Elias manages to not make a yell, and the larger man still half unconscious hugs him. He sights and starts running his hand through his hair and giving him another kiss on the mouth. Peter makes a frankly adorable sound for someone like him and puts his face in the crook of his neck wrapping himself around Elias.

Elias is content and warm. He has his soulmate with him and wonders if he can get a new ring and signature before Peter leaves, with that last thought he falls asleep wrapped in his future husband embrace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So we are getting closer to current time. We got frst wedding and the divorces and also finally one of them realizes the whole soulmate thing. Or is he the first one to realize? :) But since its Elias he is not going to say anything. Thanks for the comments they make want to write more and be able to finish the story.
> 
> Scream at me in the void about lonelyeyes in my [tumblr](https://p1nkwitch.tumblr.com/)


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter warning: puking, being ill and a little smut as a treat at the end.

It must be at least a few hours before he wakes, when he does, he notices the cold. Elias turns and knows that Peter left, the bitterness and disappointment he feels are expected.

The actual worry in case the other got stuck again came next, so he tries to find him. Fortunately he can see him and a brush of his mind tells him Peter is upset (understandable) and angry at him and Gertrude. At the woman he can understand, but him? He went through the actual effort of picking up his sorry excuse of a body out of the lonely and this is how he pays him? How dare he.

He fumes for a while and decides to just enjoy the place then, if the other is choosing to be difficult then so be it. He takes off the clothes he took to forsaken and puts them to wash, he doesn’t want the smell of desperation and loneliness to stick to him. Elias ends up taking a bath, with all the bubbles and warmth he wants to just reward himself.

He relaxes and doesn’t think about stubborn sailors and their badly though rituals. 

Elias changes into comfy clothes and goes to open the most expensive bottle of wine in the apartment, courtesy of Peter of course. And definitely hopes he chokes wherever the bastard is. Soulmate or not, he doesn’t get to blame him. Elias mulls over whether he should tell the other to hang it over his head but…

There is the little issue of, if _he_ is Peter’s soulmate. He tries to think back on any moment where he saw the other with anything belonging to him, but the thing is, he can’t. A little more investigation is needed.

If he is the one to admit it, but it’s not corresponded, it would only be used against him.

Elias drinks and eats some ice cream, while watching reality tv, he deserves it after this entire mess of a day. He drinks the entire bottle and when he is done goes to open and drink whisky. By the time Peter does come back Elias is very drunk.

Lying on the couch he hears the sound of the door opening and heavy footsteps, if the other though he was going to leave he has a storm coming. Unfortunately he’s is no position to get up and not be sick so Elias curls up into himself and shivers a little, he is getting chilly for some reason.

Peter walks behind the couch without saying anything and goes to the kitchen, he can hear him move stuff, eventually the other man goes away to their room. He blinks blearily and decides to just sleep it off, it must be close to midnight, tomorrow he is going to have such a headache. He must have dozed off a little after that last though, because he wakes by the feel of someone running their fingers through his hair. He remains still and refuses to open his eyes. Uses the paintings to see, even with the dizziness, Peter sitting with his head on his lap playing with his hair. He also sees a blanket covering him.

The motion is so soothing it makes him almost go back to sleep again. However Peter stops and Elias makes a very undignified whining noise. He would be ashamed if he wasn’t still drunk. He hears a sight from the other, and watches him give the tiniest smile before a more neutral face takes precedent.

“Elias” He really doesn’t want to do this now.

“yEsh?”

Peter looked like he was about to say something before looking at him better.

“Are you… _drunk_?”

“Mayhaps? I think I’m better than before? Besides whose fault ish it?” He doesn’t like slurring but is kinda difficult not to.

“I didn’t make you drink”

“No, but yoU left and got angry at me!! I saveed You Big man” Peter scowls.

“Your archivist-!”

“I don’t con- control what she does all the time!! I found out bout this ritual this morning on the goddamn papers Peter! Maybe if you talked to me instd of giving excuses I could have said how bad of an idea it was!” He is not exactly yelling yet but he is being very loud, raising his head, despite the world turning upside down, he glares at the other and uses Beholding so he can stare at him even more. The future migraine should be worth it.

“She still works for you! Besides what I do for the ritual of my god, is only for me and those following forsaken. You don’t get to know everything from me Elias! That is _not_ how things work for us” Peter tries to sound calm be he can tell he’s angry, Beholding focuses on the taller man even more to try and see him, maybe he will dig for the soulmate thing too, just to get things over with.

“I went and took you out! I should have left you to rot then if you act like this. Well it’s how I am Peter, you married me knowing I want to know everything I can!”

“WELL MAYBE I SHOULDN’T HAVE-“ He cuts himself immediately and stammers a little, but it’s too late. The cold is already creeping at him from the center of his chest, it’s easier to be poisonous then. He feels stone cold sober now.

“No, finish that sentence Peter” At this point he is sitting down, the world is blurry and he feels like shit, but he is not going to let the other have this.

“Maybe you shouldn’t have what? Married me? Well good news for you we were never really married on the first place, a written piece of paper from you doesn’t make it official. If me being here is so disappointing then ill leave, get in contact with Nathaniel or Conrad and arrange for another Lukas to take care of finances, let you go and be free as you wish!” He stands up. Peter looks like he got punched in the chest.

“Because that is what you desire isn’t it? True and complete loneliness, well-“ He spreads his arms to the sides (He feels hot, too much in fact, he might be swaying too) “Than you can have it, I hope forsaken sucks you off for your efforts, or oh! Right! It tried to suck the life out of you, if I recall!” Elias has to sit down, he needs to, but instead he starts to walk to the room.

“Congratulations! I’ll get out of your life, right, NOW! _Run and disappear if you can_ ” Inside the bedroom he goes to grab his stuff, at least the things he can take at the moment, and put it in a suitcase. He laughs bitterly for a few seconds “Maybe you didn’t get your stupid ritual but at least now you can be truly forsaken, what was it you said? That to feel truly alone you need to see what you are missing? Well good, now you know, then again if it was so horrible, maybe there is no difference, maybe you just really are-!” He has half way done throwing stuff in the suitcase when Peter grabs him and turns him around.

“Can you SHUT UP” Here is the thing, Elias has never seen Peter angry, not even in memories from his youth, he has always had an air of indifference or avoidance if there was conflict, so he stills. He isn’t afraid, if there is one thing he knows without a doubt is that Peter would never actually harm him. He is a monster, but not _that_ kind of monster.

Peter is breathing fairly heavily and glaring at him with a scowl on his mouth. He… doesn’t like it. The man has a permanent blank face or a cheery one, this is unnatural and he hates it.

Elias feels a stab of pure pain in his head and his legs don’t give up on him by sheer spite, his body temperature is definitely higher than it should and nausea is really setting in.

“Now, if you could actually listen Elias I-“ He can’t hear the end of what he says by force of needing to puke. He does manage to twist to the side and not throw up directly into the other. (Although he deserves it). His legs do give up then, but he doesn’t hit the floor, the other must have catched him. He hears a curse next to his ear.

“I don’t feel so good” The pain in his head makes him want to hurl again and he almost does, but contains himself, just barely.

Peter manages to drag him to the bathroom and when he kicks the door close, Elias goes directly to the toilet, and empties what little he had in his stomach there. He hears something being mumbled and feels a cold hand pressing against his forehead. The cold is a blessing, and he whines when it’s taken away. He thinks he hears another curse. When he is done he is practically slumped over, Peter moves him and sits him in the toilet.

“Elias, I need you to wash your mouth and then we can go to the bed ok?”

“I… I need to go” He feels feverish.

“No, no, mouth and bed you will feel better I promise”

“No!” He is being difficult and he know it, he can’t really focus, the mix between the alcohol, using beholding on Peter to mess with him and using it to guide him in forsaken, had made him ill. “I- You don’t want me? Fine! I’ll leave you alone ok? I’ll just need a cab and I will get out of your life forev-“ He can’t finish the sentence since the other man covers his mouth with his hand and cuts him off.

“You done? Good, I don’t want you to leave! Not like this, and not even if you weren’t completely wasted and sick. I was angry and didn’t mean the marriage thing. So please can you cooperate with me just once in your life little man”

“You didn’t?” Peter sighs.

“No, no I didn’t, so please just let’s get your mouth clean so you don’t bitch at me in the morning and get you to bed ok?” He nods and Peter smiles wryly and him. Grabbing his arms he helps him stand and not keel over, and with shaky hands Elias manages to brush his teeth.

“You think you can walk to the room?”

“Not really”

“Ok, put your arms around my neck”

“?” He does and next thing he knows Peter is carrying him to the bed.

“The vomi-“

“I’ll clean it, don’t worry, let’s get you to bed first”

He maneuvers him and puts him in bed. Afterwards he leaves the room. Elias feels like he is floating and is very sweaty. He comes back to himself at Peter shaking his shoulder and offering him a cup of something.

“Tea for you throat, also there is a water bottle in the night stand you are going to drink.”

“The floor?”

“Already took care of it, you are more worried about the floor than I am” Elias mumbles a little.

“One of us has to take care of the place they live in Peter” The other gives him a faint smile, and he feels much better at seeing that.

“Now drink” He does, it has honey on it. Afterwards he drinks the water and Peter puts a cold rag against his forehead.

“There much better right?”

“Yes…” He does feel like it.

“I’ll go to the couch, yell if you need something ok?” He wants him to stay. Knows that he can’t make him and feels even worse.

“…. Sure. Goodnight” Peter hesitates and looks at him with a look he can’t decipher and that he can’t even look into now. Eventually he turns and leaves.

“Goodnight”

Elias falls asleep in a dreamless heap.

The sun is currently shining and he would want nothing more than to destroy it. He scrunches his face and when he looks at the clock, he almost falls to the floor. Its late, he has to go to the Institute! He raises himself too fast and falls onto the bed again. His head is spinning, a really pathetic whimper leaves his mouth and the sound of footsteps come.

“Elias?”

“It’s late I have to go..”

“Really? You can miss your job for one day.”

“You don’t get it i-“

“I informed your secretary that you couldn’t go today, and to sent you all the work to your… email?” The disgust and bewilderment on his face would make him laugh if he could. Instead he is feeling very touched by the other man’s effort.

“You… did?”

“Yes, you really looked like you needed a day off”

They stay quiet.

“I see, how about you?”

“Me?”

“Yes you, you were the one that almost dies” Peter looks affronted. Elias tries again “ _How are you feeling Peter_ ”

“I… am tired to be honest, I could use some rest, don’t do that” His shoulders sag, and he can see purple bags under his eyes, he is definitely paler, which is surprising, considering how fair his complexion already is.

“Can’t help it” Peter sighs.

“I made breakfast, something light, can you stand?”

Elias gets up slowly, the headache is still there, but walking is, if slow, possible.

“Yes I think I can manage”

“Good”

In the kitchen he sits, Peter offers another cup of tea and some food. They eat in silence.

“Peter”

“Elias”

“…. I will go if I really bother you that much you know? I still have my place and I can move now at least.”

Peter looks around him, not directly into his face.

“I would rather you don’t”

“Why? Wouldn’t you be better with me gone, certainly it would gain you favor with your patron”

“No” He looks like he is thinking and bites his lip in the process “It would be favorable, but not to me”

He stares at Peter for a while, he wants to know, but right now it will drawn him away, if he tries to find out directly.

“If you say so” He looks morosely to the side. Peter looks uncomfortable now, eventually after 10 minutes he caves.

“I don’t want you to leave, it would make me lonely but I won’t enjoy it in the slightest. It would be… too much for me” Elias looks at Peter and wants to dissect him to understand him. He is a walking contradiction, and it thrills him just as much as it annoys him.

“For the record. I don’t want to leave either if it makes you feel any better.” Peters smile is covered by the cup of tea.

“It does”

Two hours later, they are in bed resting their respective ailments together.

Peter runs colder than him so he uses him as a pillow to chill himself. According to the other, he on the other hand, is usually a furnace, maybe it’s all the rage in such a tiny vessel, Peter muses. He hits him in the chest and snorts.

“Where did you go?”

“Mm needed to be out and move, was too angry.”

“Oh”

“Also to go buy something”

“What could you possible want to buy at that moment??”

He looks at him and kisses his forehead, reaches into the nightstand drawer and takes out a box.

“Are you kidding me” What?

“No, not really”

“I thought you were too mad at me!!”

“I was! Doesn’t mean I don’t want to marry you. You did come for me, and I had been neglecting to give you a new one”

Elias wants to hit him again, so he does. Peter laughs at him, he still grabs the box and looks at the new engagement ring.

“You got me this and still had the nerve to say-“

“YES, yes I know, like a said I was angry, and you weren’t helping at the moment Elias”

“God you are the worst, I don’t know why I keep putting up with you” He say it fondly and recognizes is the closest they will get to say I love you. What he said in forsaken doesn’t count, Peter didn’t hear him, not really, he checked.

“Is that a yes?”

“Yes, you insufferable idiot, it’s a yes”

Peter laughs at him, turns on his side, making him roll to his and before he manages to complain, he kissed him on the mouth.

He responds in kind, it starts slow but speeds up and gets more heated. His hands go underneath Peter’s shirt and start caressing his chest and stomach, making the other sigh into his mouth, he takes his chance and bites his lower lip to get his tongue in.

Peter grabs his hips and puts his leg in between his, rubbing against his erection trough his pants making him moan. He feels a smirk against his mouth. He stops a little and looks at him, one of his hands comes back from underneath his shirt and caresses his cheek.

“I’m still tired you bastard.”

Peter nuzzles him like the dog he is, kisses him once in the forehead and then the mouth.

“Me too, but I feel like I owe you a little so don’t worry” He blinks slowly at him but ends up moaning when the other starts rubbing his leg against him more.

Peter chuckles and kisses him practically drinking him in. One hand goes to his face mirroring his movements from before and touches his cheek. Elias can’t help grinding against him, he tries to hide his face in the others neck but the hand in his face keeps him there.

“I would love to see you”

_That_

_“Fuck” Peter bites his neck and kisses him softly. He melts against him._

“Not today no”

They are still facing each other, Peter keeps moving his leg at a tortuous pace, making him move his hips to have more friction, that is, until the other uses both hands to keep him still. With a very deliberated movement he sneaks one into the waistband of his pants and starts to stroke him.

Elias tries to keep quiet but it’s not really working, the feeling of being watched and the movements the other keeps making with his leg and hand are making him dizzy. Peter keeps talking while taking care of him.

“There you go, doing so good for me hm, look at that pretty face of yours making the most wonderful sounds, do you think you could come just by rubbing yourself against my leg?

“Peter- ple- please”

“Please what dear? Be more specific” He kisses him on the mouth and plays with his tongue, while his strokes get faster.

“I’m- n.. Peter”

“You look so good like this you know? So nice and pliant for me, no messing with my head just being good.” Elias hands play with the others body as much as they can, making Peter also moan into him.

He starts kissing his jaw and putting more pressure into his movements.

“I do like watching you like this…” And fuck what can he say to that? “Very needy today aren’t we? My fault honestly” He kisses him like he were apologizing all over his skin, Elias wants more and more of it, and fuck he want to come too so so much.

“Please - fuck, please Peter let me - I’m so close please I just want-“

“How could I ever deny you that, when you ask so nicely?” When he finishes saying that, he starts to kiss and bite his neck, trying to leave as many marks as possible, almost like a necklace. Peter makes a particular nice thrust while clenching harder at him, making him come with a shuddered breath.

Peter kisses him softly over and over, even making a crown across his forehead with them. He appreciates the sentiment.

He takes his hand off him and reaches for some tissues with the other in the bedside table to clean himself. When he finishes he lays on his back and tugs at him to let him rest in chest again.

Elias feels… very good. He is definitely spent now, his eyes struggle to remain open but he can’t help to try and move his hand to Peters own problem. The other stops him.

“No need”

“Pretty sure you need to..”

Peter smiles tiredly at him, he can still see the bags under his eyes.

“I owed it to you, I don’t really feel like… well, not now. Maybe later”

He hesitates, but he really can’t remain awake for much longer.

“If you say so…”

Peter kisses him one last time before he falls asleep wrapped around the other cool touch against his warm skin. A sigh leaves his lip. Peter watches him for a little bit more before closing his own eyes. He will have to leave the next day for sure, the failure of his ritual is still present, so he is going to leave for a long while this time. But before that, he will rest and enjoy Elias for as long as he can.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath of the last chapter was supposed to be short. Supossed but it turned into its own chapter, so there are at least 4 more before im done. Also first smut ever, if you dont like it yell at me in the comments, if you do then do that too? Thanks to everyone who commented, you guys really, really make my day.   
> Scream at me in the void about lonelyeyes in my [tumblr](https://p1nkwitch.tumblr.com/)


	9. Chapter 9

Peter had to leave for a year to fix things with the aftermath of the failed ritual. Phone conversations were their only mean of contact, besides of course, the use of eye imagery to see the other man during that time, and even that became difficult.

Gertrude did come to his office to inform him about her trip to an island that didn’t exist, when he questioned how she planned to reach the place, the woman simply told him that she got a ride. Peter called him that night telling him with the most utter distaste that he will be taking Gertrude. He questioned his reasoning but the other kept dodging his questions, when it seemed he was about to compel the answer, the lonely man proceeded to say goodbye and hang up on him.

Elias ended up staring at the phone in bewilderment for a minute.

Besides that particular incident, the next four years afterwards went rather well with the institute, yes of course, his archivist did lose her 3 assistants in the span of less than a month, but she did at least tell him about her intentions with Emma beforehand, as long as it wasn’t taken care of in institute grounds, he did not care how she disposed of the little spider. The paperwork for Michael and Sarah was a little more annoying but neither of them had remaining family that could complain, and their contracts did cover work related deaths.

Why no one reads their contracts goes beyond him, the thing actually mentions the whole worshipping a fear god, but apparently no one likes to read 25 pages of legal jargon, so their loss.

He actually had fun thinking the whole thing.

Elias was having a lovely day actually, he was eating lunch when he got a call.

“Hello?”

“Hello Elias”

“Ah Peter, wasn’t expecting you to call me today, let alone during work hours” He was puzzled, Peter made sure to not contact him during work, apparently the feeling of surveillance in the Institute annoyed him, even by phone.

“Yes but I though the occasion required it”

“Occasion?”

“Oh you don’t know little man? Well that makes things better for me, anyways how do you feel about dinner tonight? Same restaurant where we had our first date” His self-assured tone annoyed him, he was about to reject him on principal but hesitated, the fact that he choose that particular location is important and he can never refuse a mystery.

“I’ll see if I can change my plans” Peter snorts at him.

“By plans you mean yell at the potted lilies so they grow better, watch reality tv for the _“drama”_ eat some delivery food and do more work? Then yes by all means do keep them intact.”

“You know I don’t like your tone right? I will not show up if you keep that up. Also hmm someone _knows_ me fairly good”

“Ugh, will you come or not?” He can’t see him, but he can tell the body shudder the other man gave just by implying he knows him.

“Yes yes, whatever, same time as always? “

“Yes, I’ll pick you up”

“ _Sea_ you Love”

“….” he hears a sight and a cut off laugh “ _See_ you Elias” He grins.

Hours later he’s at home already dressed to the nines, sometimes he does want to impress the other when he is away for a long period of time. Plus he looks really dashing and he never minds attracting other people’s looks, Peter gets lonely when he does it so it’s a win win for both of them.

He is draped over the couch, waiting, when he hears the door open. Elias turns around to look at Peter and is pleasantly surprised at the sight of the other wearing a suit. He only ever does for funerals or important events, he might have heard him complain about having to get a new one for a family wedding. His black and grey hair is actually styled for once and his beard is in perfect condition and to his standards. He looks incredibly handsome to him.

Peter is handsome but in an average way, enough that he might be a passing through to anyone else. To him however, even after all this years the sight of the man makes his heart flutter and his hands to sweat. At least until he speaks and says something stupid but its rather charming at this point.

The other man looks at him and leans down to kiss him, he reciprocates gladly.

“ _Enjoying the view dear_?” Peter caresses his face slightly.

“Very much so my Shining Lighthouse” He rolls his eyes but smiles.

“I told you to stop with the nicknames”

“You started it, you wicked man”

Elias stands up and starts to go to the door to pick up his jacket before the other stops him and offers him some lilies. He feels his eyebrows shoot up and his face getting warmer.

“Now I feel like I have missed something important if you are being this forward Peter”

“You sort of did, but it makes things better” He takes the flowers and puts them in a vase, then picks up his jacket and leaves with the other.

When they are gone a tie with little anchors appear inside Elias side of the closet, while one of his eye earrings appear in Peter drawer.

The restaurant has changed after almost 17 years but the place where they go to sit is the same as before, and the waitress might be new but treats them just like the one back then.

He takes notice of several people turning to him or thinking about him, which makes his grin wider. Peter goes almost unnoticed just like he likes, and if he is seen, most people wonder how is he with him. The beard and early grays from the lonely, make him look older than him, not by much but enough to confuse others.

He rolls his eyes and starts to talk with the other while picking his food and parsing other people’s thoughts to see if there is something to share with Peter.

A man sitting in the far corner seems to had a previous brush with the lonely, he hasn’t given a statement yet. While he deliberates between waiting until he does or just give him to Peter, the man in question puts his hand on top of his to draw his attention.

“Yes?”

“I know that face, could you save your scheming for later perhaps?”

“Face? What face are you talking about sweetheart?” He says it with a poisonous sweet voice. Peter looks at him and gives him his empty smile, the one reserved to the general population.

“The one that tells me you’re already making plans about something sinister, your mouth twitches in an unpleasant smile and your eyes shine like radioactive waste. Charming to see when it’s directed at someone else, but it’s not the time now”

A woman sitting near them it’s starting to sweat from hearing them talk.

“Ohhh? Is that so big man, well I don’t like your little smile right now, the one you use when giving someone empty platitudes before striking them down, along with your eyes looking like those of a dead fish” He hears her choke. They haven’t flirted like this in a while, Peter is truly spoiling him today.

He leans forwards and drops his voice in the tone he knows Peter loves.

“So what are you going to do to stop me now _Peter_?” He loves playing this game, his ex-husband swallows and blushes slightly, but ends up grinning and turns it back on him by also lowering his voice, something he rarely does.

“I have a few ideas, but maybe if you behave yourself for now, _I can give you a reward later_ ”

The woman has completely lost it behind them. Elias looks at him and raises an eyebrow.

“Very well then” He gives him this round.

The food arrives, and Karen tries desperately to be able to change seats.

They eat and drink, when they are done they start talking, or he does at least. Peter sort of pays attention at him but it’s ok. Eventually he looks at him and clears his throat.

“So…”

“Yes?”

“As you imagine I have a reason for this”

“I imagine, unless you are trying to sweeten things to tell me you will be leaving for another year long voyage?” Peter chuckles and shakes his head in denial.

“No no, well I will eventually leave but that will be arranged and depends on some things first” Elias is curious now.

“So?” Peter looks at his face almost drinking him in. Years ago he would have never dared to, now he can, he feels his cheeks warming because of the complete attention of his soulmate stare.

“Elias Bouchard would you do me the honor of marring me?” Elias blinks at him and laughs.

“Is that all? You shouldn’t have made such a thing out of it dear, you have proposed before just because I terrorized a poor men into tears.” Peter looks at him with something close to softness in his eyes and a lot of amusement.

“True, but the thing is, I couldn’t really marry you then, now I can”

“What?”

“Check the news Elias” He spaces out to check with beholding what the other means. When he comes to, he stares at Peter with his mouth open slightly and a serious blush now.

“Oh!”

“Soooo?”

“Yes, you fog machine I will marry you”

“Great! Also your hand please?”

He gives his hand to Peter and he takes the opportunity to kiss it. Elias feels warm all over at that, the entire night makes much more sense to him now. When he is done Peter slips the new ring into his finger.

“Thank you love”

“Your welcome, now about whatever was brewing into that beautiful mind of yours?”

“So now you want to hear it?”

“Yes and maybe ask for that cake you enjoy”

“… Sure” He is not easy but he really likes that cake.

When fed, both literally and more metaphysically speaking, they leave and go to the car. In the quiet of the travel he does have to ask something important.

“Do we have to do this in Moorland House?” Peter almost swerves the car into another.

“IT WAS JUST A QUESTION PETER!!” He grabbed the door out of panic.

“God NO, just signing some papers as far away from the rest of my family please”

“I thought it was a tradition or something”

“Yes, well, I would rather not, funerals are to me a better option to see the rest of them than a wedding, more specifically my wedding”

“Ok, that sounds better to me too. I would rather not have to deal with them either”

Afterwards they kept an amiable silence, until they reached the apartment and went to bed to celebrate.

The rays of sunlight filtered into the room, it was early enough that he didn’t need to worry about going to work yet.

Peter was spooning him and keeping him warm, he was so glad he had two hours before rising. Elias didn’t expect to actually marry the other beyond their little game on the fridge. The note from their first marriage was framed and kept safe, after a little scare of thinking he lost it a few years ago, fortunately it turned back again. (He didn’t realize that he had never put it in that drawer, out of sheer relief) When he couldn’t find it he almost teared the entire place down board by board, he wouldn’t admit to Peter why he was so angry or anxious, out of embarrassment.

He moves a little and Peter buries himself against his back even more, Elias is fond of him in moments like this, so true to what he wants and so very helpless. He wants to turn and kiss him, to see into him and be the only thing the other wants. Forsaken will always be first to the other, just like Beholding will be for him, but in moments like this he can’t help but to want more. He falls asleep again, but before that he is already choosing what he is going to wear and what their honeymoon will be.

Hours later both of them are in the kitchen, Elias reads the newspaper, and Peter prepares some scrambled eggs. After a few minutes he remembers something important and has to ask.

“What about witnesses?”

“Did not leave any yesterday if you recall my lovely seashell” He groans at him.

“I mean, for the wedding you idiot” Peter turns with a plate in hand.

“Can’t we just ask whoever is there and get it over with?”

“I will not leave it to a pair of strangers Peter” Elias tells him with the driest tone possible.

“Fine, who do you even suggest?”

“You are participation you should give your own opinion”

“Yes, but I’m not the control freak, you probably already though about everything” He is right, he just doesn’t want to admit it “Stop pouting, it’s unbecoming for someone your age _dear_ ”

“… So what if I did”

“Nothing, I don’t want to do it, and I know you do it’s why we work so well”

“Right, I’m you social buffer” Peter laughs at his face and kisses him several times. “Look, just pick it’s not that hard.”

“How about this I pick for you and you pick for me?” That’s interesting.

“Why?”

“It will be fun?”

“… Fine”

Later while he changes, Peter stands behind him and wraps his arms around his torso while leaning down to put his chin next to his face. Elias mulls it over and decides to say something when the other beard start to tickle his neck.

“How about Mikaele”

“Simon is-”

They both stop and look at each other.

“Simon and Salesa?” He asks him.

“Simon knows both of us, you from when you were in your original body, and Salesa is… a good acquaintance to the both of us” What Peter means is that those two are besides him the only other two people he tolerates, or dare he say it, likes, Thaddeus is a close third, but mixing work with personal life is against his values.

“I can work with that”

At dinner, not even looking up, he simply tells him his idea.

“One month of honeymoon” Peter without missing a beat responds.

“A week”

“Three”

“Two, I leave for six months and pay extra in the next fundraiser”

“… Perfect” He always falls for it. “I take it you will leave until then?”

“Have too if I want to be able to stay two weeks with you”

“I see, I will tell you all the details and inform you of the date, I will speak with Simon and you can talk with Mikaele” He can see the other start to complain “No buts dear, make a bet with him I don’t care just get him there”

“Fine”

Elias spends the next month making arrangements, Peter assured him he will dress up nicely and that Mikaele actually agreed without issue.

“He actually looked… Happy I guess?” The man was apparently a sucker for weddings.

As for Simon…

He looked at him when he told him and started to laugh.

“I don’t see what is so funny”

“You… you aren’t kidding”

“Does it look like it?”

“You are actually getting married! Well well well how the times change I didn’t think I would see the day, or well I did, I just assumed you would black widow someone out of their fortune. Peter is lucky that you actually like him” Simon is as annoying about it as he thought he would be.

He is also not wrong about the black widow comment, although he never had to marry before, he is good at keeping his beloved Institute running, and conning some poor idiots is always fun.

“Would you be there?”

“Why of course! How could I ever miss it, do I give a speech? Should I write one about how you two got together or how I helped you remains like that?, Ohhh yes I like the sound of that, how abou-“

“There is no need, please just be there to sign, maybe push someone out of a window, I would even choose a place that is higher up, so just stop” Simon doesn’t seem deterred, in fact he seems even more cheerful at that.

“Shame. Oh well that does sound good, so let me know then when to go.“ He turns to leave, but stops “One more thing Jonah, do try to not break his heart, they do have a… family predisposition for heart failure” He smiles bitterly at him.

“I will try Simon” He looks at him and smiles.

“No you won’t” Aaaand he jumps out of the window. Of course.

A month and a half later has them in the courthouse with both Simon and Mikaele, both very well dressed for the occasion. Peter kept his promise and got a very expensive looking dark blue suit to wear, he also didn’t bring his captain hat which to him is a relief. Elias is also dressed to the nines in a very nice deep green suit with golden details, he feels great.

The whole legal affair was quick and went without a hitch. He is sure he saw Salesa shed a few tears at one point but will not comment on it, he is feeling rather giddy himself. (Fact: Elias almost does cry, he just managed to resist and barely so)

Simon behaved, sort of, he kept giving some interested looks to the man marrying them. (He did make an offensive comment, very lowly so as to not be heard by anyone, but Simon did) He gave him a friendly pat in the back before leaving. An hour later the man would run off and jump through the window. Witnesses claim he yelled he was not able to stop falling.

Their companions congratulated them, Simon talked to Peter on the side for a while and Mikaele offered him a discount for the next shipment of oddities.

When he heard Peter make a strangled noise, Elias turned and saw him fuming at Simon while being completely red in the face. It was lovely, sneakily he managed to take a picture with his phone. Salesa chose not to comment but grinned at the ordeal.

Pictures of Peter are rare, forsaken corrupts the files more often than not, but if it taken when the other is not under its influence they come rather well. He has a folder in his computer under password with all the ones he managed to snatch, he looks at them at work from time to time when he feels nostalgic. Mobile phones had made his life easier in that regard, surveillance is beholding’s greatest friend.

Afterwards they take a two week trip to Greece, Elias takes a laptop to be able to answer emails from the institute, while using Peter as a glorified chair, lying on the hotel couch together.

True they do spend time with each other, but moments where he just works and pretends Peter is not there keep them both satisfied.

He gets his company and Peter his loneliness.

Not to say that the other doesn’t take advantage of the position from time to time. Elias feels Peter leaning forwards and pressing himself closer to his back, while kissing his neck. It’s pleasant and makes the fondness he has for him even more palpable, it also makes it so that when this is over, the loneliness he will feel to an empty apartment would sooth the other gods. Forsaken tends to take what he wants and it bothers him, he starts scowling and tensing just thinking about later, when Peter moves his laptop from his lap and turns his face to kiss him in the cheek, nose, eyelids.

Elias starts to melt under it, right now he has him, for as long as it takes for his ritual to work he has Peter.

The other presses his lips against the corner of his mouth and looks at him then downwards and smiles while finally kissing him. Over and over, slowly and languidly they end up making out for a while until he decides it’s enough and tells him he wants to go to the beach.

Peter laughs, ruffles his hair (He is going to stab him, he swears to beholding) and goes to change.

Elias huffs, he hasn’t been able to tell yet if _he_ is Peter’s soulmate, their apartment has both of their stuff so he can’t tell. Currently as they are together here there is nothing to lose and test that theory out yet either.

He pouts and decides to get up and get his stuff too, the beach will be completely empty for both of their sakes and he intends to sit, relax and read. If someone manages to come well, they will find a way to entertain themselves then.

For dinner they got delivered a wonderful meal and a bottle of champagne. When they were done they went to their balcony, it was quiet and they could see the calm sea, Elias leaned his head against the other until, from a building nearby they started to hear music.

_“I was tired of my lady  
We'd been together too long  
Like a worn out recording  
Of a favorite song”_

“Is… is that the piña colada song?”

“Elias I have no idea what you are talking about”

_“So while she lay there sleeping  
I read the paper in bed  
And in the personal columns  
There was this letter I read”_

Peter turns to him, and with a look of mischief, that should not look so good on someone who lacks most normal social cues, asks him in a very serious tone while offering his hand.

“Will you dance with me Mr. Bouchard?” Elias looks at him like he grown another head, but ends up smiling and grabbing his offered hand.

“Sure Mr. Lukas”

They mostly leaned on each other, Elias put his head against the other chest and started to slow dance while the song kept going. This moment feels perfect, by the time they go back to their respective responsibilities, it would be nothing more than a just a memory, a blink and miss it moment, but… he will treasure it none the less.

_“So I waited with high hopes  
And she walked in the place  
I knew her smile in an instant  
I knew the curve of her face  
It was my own lovely lady  
And she said, "Aw, it's you"  
Then we laughed for a moment  
And I said, "I never knew"_

_"That you liked piña coladas  
And getting caught in the rain  
And the feel of the ocean  
And the taste of champagne  
If you like making love at midnight  
In the dunes on the cape  
You're the lady I've looked for  
Come with me, and escape"_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two awfull people get a lot of soft moments but dont deserve them in the slightest. Do i care? Not really.  
> Scream at me in the void about lonelyeyes in my [tumblr](https://p1nkwitch.tumblr.com/)


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An assorted speed run through season one to four from the evil capitalist himself. And a special change of Pov.

So

Good news Gertrude is dead.

Bad news are that he has to frame the whole thing as a disappearance and do it fast.

…

The woman who had for almost 50 years terrorized several avatars, stopped rituals and everything of the like is dead by three shots to the chest.

That is what it took him to take her down… If he doesn’t count the fact that she got up after the first one and still tried to kill him. The other two shots were more panic than anything, he will admit, Elias did not scream when she still tried to take a swing at him.

He did not.

Using beholding to change the feed of the cameras from the Institute takes just a little while, making her office look like there was a struggle and have her blood on the desk is a whole new issue. The entire thing takes him two hours, and it’s already five in the morning.

He still needs to leave, change, come back at the time the institute opens and report the scene. So the tunnels are his best shot.

Hiring Jonathan Sims over Miss James, who was Gertrude’s choice, was very simple, the man already was marked by the web and delivered to him like a blessing from the Mother herself. Meanwhile Sasha seemed like a very competent person, and if that wretched woman picked her, it would mean she could be a problem in the long run.

Neither of them had the actual qualifications for the position, although Sasha had seniority, Timothy’s idea that it was a sexist choice on his part wasn’t correct, he just really really would love not to deal with another possible Gertrude… Also, Jimmy Magnet? How dare he. Anyways, Jon requested both of them as assistants and he added Martin into the mix, the man’s fear of his lies being discovered should keep things interesting enough.

Through the months Jon skepticisms was fun to watch, he did have to do some damage control when he bothered Miss Herne and tried to bring forth investigations into the Lukases,  _ that _ should not do.

It reminds him that he should call Peter soon, they are currently “broken up”, legally of course they are still married, but their little game of divorces is still ongoing. Theorically they are in their fifth one. The other was very angry last time they broke up so he had given him space. Maybe a couple more months, he finally has a vague idea of how to involve Peter to get Jon marked by the lonely if the man manages to survive for that long.

Elias looks at the pen holder with the owl, given to him by Peter all those years ago, and traces his fingers on the brim, only six years and they would have made it to their 25 year anniversary. He gives a half sad smile and closes his eyes, maybe he can sneak a couple more “marriages” before then.

When Jon records the statement about the Tundra he actually goes and collects it along with the transcription. Elias thought he had all of the statements with Peter in his office but apparently that one escaped his notice. Despite trying to reach peak anonymity his dear captain does leave a few stragglers to come and crawl back to him. It’s their own version of sending him flowers. In return he tells him of any potential person of interest who was marked by the lonely and escaped.

He remembers the time he gave him 3 sacrifices in a row, when he found in his office an actual picture of him inside a compass. He was so flustered by it, he ended up laying his head on the desk and trying to resist calling him immediately.

Jane Prentiss is as unpleasant as he imagined, her rot and “children’s” going through his archive is giving him nausea, on a literal and metaphysical level. Sasha urges him to go and activate the sprinkler system to kill the worms with the CO2.

He does manage to lose her, and barely so, Elias walks calmly to the room and sees through his "other sigh" the table in artifact storage and the real Sasha's unfortunate demise. He did suggest to Jon to destroy the table, but he supposes the stranger will have the means to mark him more easily like this, less danger than with the unknowing.

After the attack, finding Gertrudes corpse and the subconscious influence of the stranger, Jon’s paranoia is understandable however "it" being pointed at everyone is alarming and entertaining. Jon is truly terrible at hiding his investigation and making the correct connections, the intervention against him is quite fun, he had to keep himself from smirking all the way through it. 

Elias calls Peter and spends an hour telling him about the entire thing while drinking coffee and eating some wonderful cookies the other sent his way. His ex-husband truly spoils him, he even manages to get the other to tell him of a sacrifice he made. He also sent a new ring and a signed paper, it seems sixth marriage it is. 

While all of this is happening there is also well.

There is also the  _ situation _ .

More specifically the JonMartin situation.

Jon starts to receive Martin's lost objects during his paranoia, but can’t for the life of himself realize they belong to the other man, or if he  _ does _ , he thinks Martin just forgot them in the archives  _ and returns them to him! _ Now  _ he _ can’t judge too much on that front, considering his own situation regarding Peter, but.

But

It’s so painfully obvious it’s not even funny. Poetry books, _Martins_ _own poetry_ , large sweaters. He would think Jon is just messing with the other, but checking proves _that is not the case_ , it's bewildering.

Martin on the other hand realized it was Jon almost instantly along with Tim and Sasha who, back then, teased the man about his crush/soulmate being his boss, at least he is sure Tim did, even his memories of Sasha are compromised, the notthem work is very reaching.

As entertaining as it is seeing both of them flounder, along with Jon’s paranoia things eventually escalate.

Elias fucked up.

Well, he didn’t, not really? Anyways

He just

He just panicked ok?

Jurgen Leitner’s body is currently bleeding out in his archivist office. The man had it coming, almost telling Jon everything and more importantly,  _ living under his institute the whole bloody time. _ THAT infuriates him the most.

Elias however has to worry about changing his clothes desperately quick, before the police arrives, he erases all proof from the camera feed immediately and starts preparing, alibis, potential blackmail and everything that should be necessary in case the situation goes out of control. He  _ needs _ things to pan out the way he wants.

They do.

Jon is traveling and learning, becoming a better archivist than Gertrude ever was. Getting marks, with only tiny pointers into the right direction while the man makes all the decisions without any self-preservation whatsoever to get them. The fact he managed to not die is impressive on itself, he must admit. Elias has great Hope's that he will be the one to give him his crown. He just needs to point him into the right track.

…

Compulsion is… definitely tingly.

He doesn’t get why Peter complains so much, it’s kind of pleasant. He plays with the silver bracelet with waves that he found this morning in his drawer, while waiting for the rest of Jon’s entourage to reach his office.

Getting all the assistants up to date along with Basira as a bargaining chip, (and possible replacement of Jon in case of emergency) is quite the ordeal. Tim’s hopelessness, Melanie’s fury and Martin’s confusion are expected. Jon questioning him about his humanity was not unexpected but he honestly doesn’t know what to tell him. Daisy is also a nice addition as muscle against the creatures of the stranger that will be getting closer to them soon.

He curses Nikola and tries to look for Jon, it would seriously not do to let the circus kill his archivist now, not when he still isn't fully ready to make his choice. Marking him? sure, but not murder. 

The assistants keep looking for information regarding the unknowing, telling them about Jon would be pointless. During all this he calls Peter, they had their sixth “divorce” and despite how peeved he is at him right now, Elias still phones the other and tells him to meet him at the institute soon. By soon he means before the end of the month if possible. (Last time he didn't clarify, the other decided to mess with him and take a month and half to come back) 

Jon has been gone so long that the statement givers can’t string a single coherent sentence. Elias is looking into the budget, ironically enough, when he hears the tall tale sound of his ex, entering the office through the lonely.

Without missing a beat he starts talking.

“Did you have to snatch the man just now?”

“Is that how we say hi today my squawking seagull” He wonders if he can use the pipe to bash his head too, that was horrendous. He scowls, he needs to play nice if he wants things to go his way.

“Sorry love, I’ve been very busy lately, had to do some vermin extermination under my institute”

“Oh? Is that so?”

“Yes a very annoying Scandinavian pest as a matter of fact”

“You.. Did you kill Leitner?” He sounds… thrilled. He smiles more genuinely at him and finally looks at his wayward lover.

“Yes I did, bashed his skull with a pipe, I might have panicked I’ll admit” Peter looks appraisingly at him and stands right in front of him caressing his jaw with his palm.

“My my, Elias Bouchard getting his hands dirty?” Peter leans down and brushes his lips against his, he holds his breath, it has been a long time actually.

Elias rubs his cheek against the other man’s palm and brushes his own lips softly against the other.

“You know how I acquire my bodies, should you be surprised?” Peter stands straight again and he feels the loss of contact immediately, he huffs and gives a sardonic smile.

“Not really, just didn’t see you snap like that, you are more" he taps his chin with his right hand" Premeditated with your murders…. So!” He claps his hands together. “What did you want to discuss?”

Elias looks at him and thinks about how things will change soon and this man might be gone for him. If the universe thought that by giving him a soulmate he would stop, it had been very mistaken, Elias loves Peter and wants him so much, but Jonah knows neither of them would choose the other against their god. Maybe that is another reason why they match, both of them too ensnared by their beliefs. So with that in mind he tells him of a bet, THE bet, the one that, should it pan out right, his dream might finally be achieved.

Peter is a gambler and would always accept a bet from him no matter what.

He can’t help but think about Simon's words. But it’s too late and it was never an option to stop, not now and not this close. He clutches his bracelet subconsciously while talking to Peter. 

Rosie is kind enough to get him some not poisoned coffee, after Melanie’s _performance_ _review_. He kind of has a headache now but doing some spreadsheets to calm his nerves soothes him. A whistle appears on his desk, he looks at it and puts it in the ever growing collection of Peter's lost objects in the drawer of his desk.

The feeling of burning statements is hurting him, he runs to get the key and stop Martin immediately, Elias can have a guess about why he chose this particular timing, but he needs to check on Jon and the other is making things difficult. 

Elias scowls, he sees Melanie briefly in his office and is glad that he let the recordings of his murders to be easy to find, he doesn’t want her to start digging too much into his stuff. Unfortunately she opens the wrong drawer, the one with all of Peter's lost objects and Elias almost crashes into a wall. She moves stuff and the hot fury of daring to touch what is  _ his _ (those are his, just like the man they belong to, and she dares to-) nearly overpowers his need to open the door to where Martin is.

When it does, Elias is so angry, he ends up being more vicious than intended, in the first place, to the other man.

Melanie closes the drawer and shrugs, opens the next one and finds what she was looking for. Finally making her leave the room to find Martin.

……

Martin's plan succeeded, so now he is in jail. It's not great, true he has plenty of privileges and luckily he doesn't have to deal with the other inmates thanks to his arrangement with the police, but it's not exactly a thrilling experience. 

If Elias isn't in his cell he has to provide information for the authorities, food is… lacking for a better term, watching the institute is the most entertaining thing and barely so. Peter disappears employees, Basira is trying her best to become like Gertrude in a last ditch attempt at distancing herself after the loss of Daisy, Melanie becomes more angry and erratic by the day and Martin Is slowly but surely going down the path of the lonely that his husband is laying down for him. So until Jon makes his choice and gets the marks he needs Elias has to play nice and stay in this "cage". 

He is surprised at them for thinking he can't get out on his own right, but it's better if they underestimate him in the long run. Waiting might be boring but, after all, what are some measly months against almost 20 years of waiting.

……

The months go slow but there are some highlights, the attack from the flesh wasn't supposed to happen now, not without Jon there to get marked the amount of blood, fluids and ugh meat in his beloved institution are a disgrace, he is at least glad that it's not his job to deal with the nightmare of paperwork it brings. Having Jared trapped in the hallways of the distortion is useful, he supposes, at least  _ it would be _ if he knew what was “Helen” playing at.

Being the glove of the metaphorical arm that is the distortion makes it hard to have any kind of read on her. He surmises that it should want him to succeed so maybe this is a form of help?

Besides that he is absolutely glad that he is out of the institute Elias has no doubt that Melanie would have already stabbed him, consequences be damned, the bullet from the slaughter is slowly using her already angry mindset and amping it up to a 1000, turning her into something vicious.

Being incarcerated doesn't stop the amount of stuff that appears in his room, after an arrangement with the officer in charge, caused by the unfortunate accident of an officer who threatened to dispose of his treas- stuff he means stuff, a trunk was provided along with a regular check in, to make sure nothing potentially dangerous appears.

He…. hasn't noticed before that the amount of stuff he gets is unusual. The only reason he did was because one of the men checking commented on it. He doesn't even get that much stuff from his wife.

After using beholding to look for information, he finds out that studies show there is a regular quantity of objects received by people spanning years. He makes the calculations comparing what he regularly gets and the norm, realizing that it is far superior to any regular person.

Elias is even more confused, considering Martin and Jon, before his coma, seemed to be receiving a rather bigger amount too. Not to the same level as he and his husband but definitely getting there.

He really doesn't like not knowing.

When Peter comes to visit him, he is glad for the trunk since he still can't know if he is the other soulmate. Also, thankfully, by being a Lukas, and his husband, they can have privacy. More often than not he ends up reading forms and paperwork that the other doesn't know what to do with or simply can't give to Martin to deal with it. 

Because of that, Elias sits on his cot with his back pressed against his cell while Peter sits on the floor, in between his legs just staring into space, enjoying the calm caused by him being focused on his work, accompanied only by the sound of paper shifting and Elias playing with his hair with his other hand. They can spend hours like this, both quiet but enjoying the other presence.

Sometimes Peter simply comes by night and uses the fog to turn off the camera and sleeps there with him. By morning he is gone and the cold place where he should be makes him yearn for his presence. He scowls and tries not to think about it, soon he won't have to deal with runaway husbands anymore. (He still curls up on the side the other left)

The visits are spread out, sometimes he comes three nights in a row, others once a week to get help with paperwork. 

There was a particular day after a month of no visits, where he…. felt cold, and like despite knowing that he should get up, Elias couldn't muster the energy to do it. Being stuck here was maddening without anything to really do. He started to check on the institute at least that should put him in a better mood.

But then he did feel a jolt of panic, he couldn't see into it. There was a wall of fog not letting him see into his precious institute. Elias clenched his teeth and tried to calm down, it doesn't make sense, why would he cut him off? Was it a trap? Did something happen? Maybe, maybe this was the plan all along, to get him out, cut him off and and-!! 

His breathing started to be more erratic, he was panicking, so much so, he didn't notice the fog already coming from underneath the door.

He is alone and he can't-

The feeling of someone turning his face makes him look and see Peter watching him, he looks as jovial as usual, but he can see a flash of … worry ?

“Hello there”

“Wha.. What are you-” Peter looks at his face and sits next to him.

“Came to see you my precious barnacle! It has been a while, didn't expect you to be this panicky though” He maintains his cheerful tone while speaking, which annoys him alongside with the nickname. (It does help to distract him)

“ _ Why can't i see into my institute dear _ ?” Elias looks straight at him.

“There was a little problem and it required for me to let's say make the place less approachable, one little day with no statements wont hurt, Elias we talked about-”

“What? What problem is something wron-” Peter leans forward and kisses him to shut him up, he will kick him for it but it manages to do the trick, so he responds in kind. Afterwards Peter softly bops their forehead together and smirks.

“Some people from the church of the divine host decided to make a little appearance, they are far more easy to remove than those of the flesh” He shudders at that.

“I though most of them died with their failed ritual”

“Apparently there are some stragglers left in London, or well were, i don't think they will be seen again” His husband looks positively gleeful at that.

Elias hums in appreciation and gives him a short kiss on the lips, lifting his hands he ends up caressing his cheeks and murmurs tight against his mouth.

“Thank you love” Peter blushes immediately and his eyes look to the side of Elias head.

“Your welcome” The taller man responds in a whisper, Elias smiles coyly at him and kisses his freckles all across his face, until the other, very flustered indeed, stops him.

“Now now there is no need for that”

“If you say so…” 

They end up curled in his little cot, which is hilarious because Peter is almost falling from it thanks to his size, but by practically melding together they manage to fit. The top of his head is underneath his chin and Elias has his face pressed to the other man's collarbone. He feels him kissing the top of his head, and caressing his back slowly.

“Is it just me”

“Mmm?”

“Or you are more skinny than usual?” He sights.

“I don't know if you recall but this is jail, despite the commodities, food is… lacking, so is the entertainment”

The other man remains quiet but he feels him cling to him a little more. After dozing a little, he remembers something so he kicks Peter.

“ _ WHAT WAS THAT FOR??” _

_ “ _ Firstly, because of the most awful nickname you have deigned to give me so far into our relationship and that is saying something, secondly it's been a month Peter”

“You don't usually kick me for leaving that long, also that was a lovely one i have even better ones. Do you want to hear them my wonderful shell” He gives a disgusted face.

“God no, I also usually have a jow and things to do to entertain myself, the paperwork you give me is the highlight of my day now. Otherwise the only things I do, being stuck here are, watch the institute and Jon or give the information requested of me while dealing with guards being assholes. I'm kinda getting sick of being pushed around or knocked into you know? They're Not subtle about not liking me” When he finishes he hears Peter make a noise, but before he manages to look at him the other man goes back to putting his chin on top of his head.

“I see, well i have a bunch of legal papers that require your signature and some paperwork that i had to do, which i'm sure you will enjoy to correct me on everything.” Elias takes a breath and feels… much better than before, he feels more like himself. So he smiles and presses his face to the other chest.

“Sure dear”

A couple of days later when it's time to eat there is a plate with high quality food waiting for him, he doesn't ask but rifs through the memories of the chief and sees him receiving a call letting him know of some changes regarding his stay there. Not only that but the guards that were more prone to… mess with him are nowhere to be seen.

While on his cell reading the newspaper (Another perk, something to keep him occupied) he finds an owl keychain on top of his pillow, the amount of feelings going through his head are... a lot, eventually it settles into something warm in his chest.

He won't see Peter for two more months, but by the time he wants to be furious, Jon awakens.

…..

Jon is alone, not by his own choice, no one seems glad he made it, It… hurts. More than anyones, Martin's dismissal of him hurts perhaps the worst, he understands now, he did too, right before the unknowing, Tim helped him, or more like told him straight to his face how blind he could be about the other. 

It was just hard, he never expected to have a soulmate, he was wrong. At least he thinks he is. Jon doesn't seem to be able to do anything right by the other's standards.

Trying to help Melanie backfired. He will never regret losing a rib and going into the coffing to save Daisy (The sight of the room full of tape recorders, along with teacups, poetry and a pair of really big and soft sweaters made him almost tear up) he can't. 

She seems like the only one that wants to put up with him these days, they make each other human. 

Things keep piling up of course, taking statements from people, going with Basira to find about the ritual of the dark.  _ Another  _ intervention, Annabell’s statement. Georgie’s disappointment. Everything is just too much.

Martin is still close but so far away, he uses the sweater he found after the coffin more often than not, Daisy ribs him a little but never too much, she knows it hurts. 

Eventually they both gravitate to each other and settle down while talking, she leans on his shoulder, talking about nothing in particular, and playing with his hand it's… nice. After awhile he says something funny to her and she laughs. It makes him laugh too. 

That is… the nicest he has felt in, god what is it? Months, maybe years. Her company is quiet and understanding, both getting each other struggle. Basira certainly doesn't want anything with them, unless they can prove to be useful. He smiles at Daisy and kisses the top of her head, it makes him freeze he should do that, its not-

Daisy blinks surprised and smiles softly at him returning the favor and going back to lean on him and play with his fingers. 

“Daisy?”

“Yes Jon?”

“Im.. sorry i didn't-” She sights and squeezes his hand.

“Its ok i don't mind”

“I just don't want to make you think that”

“Jon it's ok, it was nice, certainly far more than what I deserve. We are friends right?” Jon blinks and feels happy.

“Ye… Yes of course we are” He squeezes her hand back and tries to hold back tears, if Daisy notices she elects to say nothing.

Things are going well for once.

Until.

He finds Eric's Tape.

Martin refused him.

After two days he realizes he hasn't received anything from the other, when for every day since he woke up, Jon has gotten something, even as small as a crumpled page of poetry in his desk after reading a statement. He checks with beholding thinking something happened to the other, but

He is fine, he just….

Doesn't want him.

That… ha, hahahahha he starts laughing but ends up crying after a few seconds, Jon moves into the tunnels to be alone. He was right then, he was always wrong. Not even his soulmate wants him anymore. None of the other care, there is Daisy of course the only person who has stayed with him. He thinks about Martin and Georgie. Thinks about Melanie and her trying to decide if she wants to blind herself to leave.

Eventually he runs out of tears and is tired, so very tired, he has been like this for years now, ever since he took the position.

Maybe, maybe Martin was wrong.

Jon takes a breath and decides, just like before.

……

Elias goes to their apartment, takes his ring out, watches it for a second and throws it somewhere into their bedroom. He grabs all the alcohol he can get and drinks.

Then, breaks as much stuff as he can.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Side note about the whole soulmate thing that didn't fit into the cahpter, the things you receive are what the other person forgets or loses, but they are only the things that would be useful to help find each other or have some meaning to the person. That is why you wouldnt get someones forgoten homework.
> 
> Good news there is at least 1 more chapter, an epilogue and the story will be done. Maybe two but im hopefull it will be just the one. After 10 chapters we are finally getting Peter's Pov
> 
> Thanks for the comments really they seriously make my day.
> 
> Scream at me in the void about lonelyeyes in my [tumblr](https://p1nkwitch.tumblr.com/)


	11. Chapter 11

Peter Lukas wasn't sure at what age he started to “find” things. Sometimes stuff will be in his room that wasn't there before. They were always boring stuff, so he never really cared too much, sometimes he did have to wonder about it whenever he was alone in the woods exploring and stuff like keychains or ties would appear out of nowhere. The weirdest thing he found at the time was a single cufflink that looked like an owl head. That for some reason celled his attention enough to keep it.

He didn't want his family to take it away or for some of the staff to remove it, never to be seen again. He thinks about Judith who got a stuffed toy once and the next time she saw it again it was torn to pieces. So instead Peter threw away all the things that appeared that were boring, whenever he did that, he would be given more time on his own after lessons. The only thing that he kept and managed to keep was the cufflink and that was hidden in a box underneath the floorboard of his bed. Peter reasoned that it was some kind of test that his family was doing to him and he was passing unlike his siblings. 

Years passed and he kept the same routine, however there were a few more objects besides that cufflink that he kept, a pin also with the same owl, a single cassette tape (that he never tried to hear) a ring and an earring with an eye. That one he did throw away, it made him feel oddly seen.

Asking someone from his family was out of the question, so instead he went to the only person outside of it that he knew. 

Simon was old and usually didn't bother him, letting him follow him silently across the state. He would randomly show up without asking, no one in his family would kick him out, that would mean conflict or to talk to him for a period of time.

Peter didn't mind him, the man would start speaking about the open wide ocean as if he were talking with himself, while sitting in some obscure place, meanwhile he sat nearby just hearing him. The idea of a place so far away and removed from any other people made him yearn for it, he wondered if maybe he could have his own ship and just go away one day, make the world turn into a fine point in the distance where everyone else was, while he could be on his own just watching it all slip away.

Eventually he had to cut off his daydreaming since Simon just stopped talking. Frowning he turned around and saw the other staring at something next to him, when he looked to his left he saw a fancy green pen with golden details that wasn't there before. He panicked.

“It's not mine!”

“Mm? Of course not, it's a “found” object” He didn't like the way he said found. Peter scrunched up his face a little and looked anywhere but where Simon was. He felt the pull of forsaken trying to get him away. Simon must have noticed so he started to speak again.

“My my your family didn't explain what this is now, did they? Well makes sense although what a cruel thing to do”

“They throw away all the trash that appears”

“Trash?” Simon does actually frown a little at that, he has never seen him do so, the man is always smiling or looking amused.

“Yes? it's not like its useful, Judith used to get stuffed animals and Aaron puzzle pieces”

“I reckon that is far more useful to them. Well if it is trash as you say you won't mind me keeping that now would you?” Simon extends his hand to try and grab the pen, Peter feels his stomach turning unpleasantly and tries to keep still. He wants to snatch it away immediately and put it in his pocket out of reach.

The older man grabs it and examines it, he seems interested in something, smiling ruefully at it. Eventually he looks at him again and hums a little.

“Do you want it back?” Is it a trick question? He can't say yes, Simon might tell someone and he can get in trouble for it, keeping these things seem to be frowned upon. The older man sees him struggle and gives him a look that he can't interpret. (Simon is the most expressive person he knows, besides those on the street whenever he sneaks out, but he doesn't care enough to pay attention to them as long as they _leave him be)_

“I wont tell if that worries you, in fact i believe i might explain so you understand it, is that ok?” He hesitates, Peter wanted to ask Simon but…. 

Eventually after some minutes in silence (Simon never complains about him not talking or forces him to it. It's one of the reasons why he doesn't disappear him and minds his presence) he nods while playing with his fingers nervously.

“Good! Lets see, sometimes people get objects that don't belong to them, they are however from their soulmates. Your soulmate is the person that _complements you_ , and this is important lad so pay attention ok? because they don't _complete you_ , I don't get why all the young people keep making this mistake but whatever.” No, no, no.

“There must be a.. a mistake! I can't have that-” He needs to throw those things away now, if they find out about it he might get kicked out from the family, he-!

“Peter” He looks at Simon. “ Now now, no need for that, most people in your family get these things, it's actually very common. Hilarious actually, considering their stance on the whole thing, kinda like a karmic joke i suppose, my point is there is nothing wrong about it” He says it very matter of factly, he starts to calm down a little, he pulls a little at forsaken to feel more at ease.

“Now the point is, somewhere out there is someone who will understand you. I know you don't like that, but i'm sure you can find a way to deal with it that benefits you and your god. Now and this is also important soulmates don't have to be romantic, there can be age gaps, so it also means that they might be someone who can be a friend or well in your case perhaps an acquaintance that you get along with.”

“ So I will get these things forever?”

“Yes just like your soulmate will get things from you, more in fact the older you get if you are so sure about the whole lonely thing” 

“....What do you mean?”

“Well… i don't know how your lot works 100%, but i have noticed! That forsaken touched people tend to lose more stuff than regular people. Similar to vast aligned avatars” He winks at him cheerfully. He really doesn't get it.

“Ok?”

“Something to do in our case with how unimportant things are so we forget them more often than not” Peter thinks about the time he stayed in forsaken for almost four days and by the time he came back he couldn't remember why he did it ( Peter doesn't remember when Judith and Aaron left and every time he “ _goes away_ ” he remember less and less of their faces. There would be a point in the future where he won’t care enough to)

“I think i get it” Simon looks at him not with pity, that would be insulting but it is sad he thinks, he still hates it.

“Thanks for that, i'll have to go now” He doesn't say goodbye, he never does, Simon doesn’t care either way, he is thankful for that.

“Sure sure, before that do you want this back or should i keep it ?” He waves the pen like a taunt. He clenches his jaw and shakes his head. The other man shrugs and makes a salute at him before he takes off.

“Well well, didn't _see_ this coming old chap” Simon looks at the pen that has the name James Wright inscripted on it.

  
  
  


Peter eventually figures out his answer, he has a soulmate that he refuses to meet, dooming them to a life of loneliness. 

He realizes in one of his journeys to the city at night that, how can he be lonely, truly lonely, if he doesnt have something to compare and know how alone he is? The answer is of course that he can't. 

  
  
  


When he leaves Mooreland House to work at the Tundra he couldn't be happier, he takes all of his “treasures” and puts them in a trunk in his room on the ship. He does think belatedly about pirates and treasure chests, although his has more random junk than anything. 

At last he can have his things without worrying about anyone taking them away from him.

  
  


A few more years pass, eventually Nathaniel called him to inform him of his new position as the one in charge of the relations with the Magnus Institute. Peter doesn't want to but he has no say on the matter, and so he goes. Before leaving he finds a tie waiting for him that wasn't his, the thing is like all the other objects in his possession of a very nice quality, after thinking it a little he decides to wear it.

He didn't like James Wright, he had a nasty look on his face and the feeling of being seen that he gave him bothered him a great deal. Agreeing to pay and not having to deal with him in person was his salvation. However the other seemed to take offense to him and decided to call him once a month to speak with him. It was infuriating, after a year it became an annoying tradition. By the two year mark it was routine, so when he didn't get a call he was confused. Instead Nathaniel informed him of the death of the other man and told him to come back. 

After two years he could manage to feel a little loss so it gave him a chance to feed his god. Peter wouldn't say he cared for the other man but.. he did get used to his presence. Funerals were also great for forsaken, always some poor idiot feeling bad somewhere.

He couldn't find his sweater and scarf anywhere, he knew they were a lost cause, it… made sense, he had gotten rather attached to them, so forgetting them and losing them was… expected yes but still annoying. He couldn't begrudge Forsaken for making him forget. Peter did however find a green scarf to replace the one he lost, at least his soulmate was giving him something more useful. It had a very nice smell and was very soft, making it more appealing to run his fingers through it when he was nervous. Not that he should, it was a bad habit, that most of the rotating staff tried to make him stop doing. For all the good _that_ did.

So he went to the funeral, and everything got turned upside down.

He didn't want to have a date with the other, he knew it was a date. But the bet was so very tempting and Elias/James? was also very…. handsome. Peter always tried to remain away from everyone else except for work so this was a.. first.

…..

From then on things started to escalate, finding out that the other was Jonah Magnus was quite honestly the most baffling and unexpected thing that happened to him so far. Or it would be if he hadn't wanted to go out again with Elias, the dinner had been fun along with the bet. He could tell the other used it as an excuse to ask him again and he was glad for it. More than anything he was glad to not have to vocalize those thoughts, Elias could known them, saving him the time to explain himself.

Elias was handsome, he kinda felt bad for the poor bloke who had his life stolen but, it didn't change the fact that the man itself was interesting and entertaining. He still had the same smile that said he was gonna shank him for his money, but also a more normal one, very nice actually. Elias also… touched him, which with anyone else, it would make him immediately send them away, but he couldn't, he stiffened and felt his heart pick up, he didn't get it, just thinking about all of it makes his cheeks burn a little. Peter thinks it might be embarrassment but he is not so sure...

Eventually he goes back to his place, where just thinking about wanting to hear the other laugh or smile at him, but not being able to _yet_ , gives him an ache of loneliness so wonderful, that he has to sit for a little.

He can definitely work with that.

  
  
  


For the next year they keep going out with each other, at least whenever he is in London, otherwise phone calls are the next best thing, in Elias words. He notices a trend, when he is gone, the feeling of loneliness he gets is for the first few days fairly strong eventually of course the fog and feeling of his god near him drowns it out but it works for him. There is also Elias, who at first notice he didnt realize was rather lonely actually. Makes sense, changing bodies having to always restart any relationship from the beginning without selling himself out leaves him very prone to it. 

…. He also seems to be more so whenever Peter doesn't talk with him on the phone when he leaves for long periods of time. 

How delightful, he gets to see him and feed on him, like a symbiotic relationship, oh he is aware of the other sifting through his memories, he lets him, to a degree of course, it's only fair.

Eventually he has to admit at some point that he might have run out of ideas for dates and had to resort to look for some kind of help. 

There was no way he would ask Simon, just no. It's not worth the mental scarring. 

On one of his stops on port he finds an old empty bookstore,(the crew wanted to stay a few days on ground after the last sacrifice, so they were making the most of their time leaving him to his own, just like he liked) he wondered if there was something useful in there, eventually he found a manual about dating. He was just thankful that he wouldn't have to ask anyone about it. Peter used the lonely and left money on the counter for it, pretty sure there was more cash than what it was worth but he doesn't really care. 

Reading it proved to be both enlightening and also wrong in a lot of things, there was no way he was “in love” with the other it was just a mutually beneficial relationship that's it. Eventually he will end things and leave the other to wallow in his misery.

He does read the thing a few more times just in case, before tossing it somewhere in his cabin. Weeks later when Elias calls him letting him know that he wants to have dinner at his place he looks for it desperately but cant find it anywhere.

Eventually he resigns himself, recalling something about inviting someone to their place and what it means, that line of thought makes him blank out for ten minutes. He starts thinking about the other man, the way he says his name and looks at him, the constant little touches that make his skin tingle with the sensation. He has watched the other mouth a few times while trying to avoid his eyes and yes, that was a terrible idea, his lips looked soft and when the other noticed he blushed slightly making him freak out instantly on the inside. Not only that but he always wears such nice and fitted clothing he can see the perfect shape of his bo-

He gets up from his couch and goes to take a cold shower to calm down.

it did not calm him down at all.

Eventually he decides to just go and stay in forsaken until he is back to normal. No useless thoughts plaguing his mind.

  
  
  


His useless thoughts don't make justice to the other man clad only in the bathrobe he sent him looking at him from the door. Elias lets him in and goes to change, he grabs his face on the couch. 

“Why did I have to come early for once? God it's not fair he looked so-” His mind can't provide a word for it, more like an indescribable mess. He wanted to grab the other man and press him against himself so much.

Eventually Elias comes out, his eyes betray him and look at the other man's collarbone, making the other wink at him. 

He curses under his breath.

The rest of the night goes fairly well, he managed to fluster the other quite a lot as a little payback, the feeling of the shorter man's back against his chest made him almost lose it, but he knows how to wait things out.

Then they almost kiss. 

….

He had to leave. Peter wanted to kiss him so much he felt forsaken retreat from him, it made him panic, _it_ had never happened before in his life. In a last ditch effort he thought about the other misery if he left him there and just like that he was gone. 

Back in his place Peter just stayed there unmoving for a long while. The embarrassment burned him, both from his panic and his reaction to it.

He really just wanted to be alone now, no feelings getting in the way. 

Elias called him a couple of times but he refused to answer.

Days later at sea already on the Tundra feeling, well… less, Peter figured he should probably compensate the other so sending him gifts it would be, before he seemed to react very well to it, even wearing them. His soulmate seemed to have a similar built to Elias so he took a dress shirt that appeared one day, and used those measurements to buy one for the other.

Every port they stopped at, he got something for Elias and also more things to replace whatever he lost to his soulmate, that was getting annoying.

Then one day he got a letter, weird but not unheard of, the logo of the Magnus Institute watched him, a feeling like dread came to him.

The letter was very precise and succinct in asking him to please refrain from sending more gifts and that please to just keep things professional, going back to only discussing budget and donations when necessary. He looks at it for a little bit longer and eventually throws it away. 

He sees Simon before leaving port he really didn't feel the mood for talking or even to just pretend to listen. So he made an excuse and left.

It took him a while, but Peter noticed he didn't get any new things from his soulmate, which was weird. Weeks later he would go to pick up his scarf since the weather was getting colder and realize that it was gone, in its place the blue one he originally had replaced it.

He froze.

Slowly he went to his chest of found stuff. He opened it.

At least he thinks, feeling cold enough that he decides not to use the scarf anyways, his god is pleased.

All the stuff he had was gone, in its place where things that he barely remembers owning. He sees broken pieces of a ship in a bottle he had on top. He moves some of the objects till he reaches the small box where he put the objects originally in Moorland House. The cassette, pin and cufflink were all gone.

After a while sitting there he gets up, closes the lid and leaves.

He doesn't remember the next week.

  
  
  
  


Elias calls him and they talk. 

A week later he finds the green scarf in his bed, checking the chest, things are back in their place, he feels a little tug of relief.

A month goes by and they have their date, a little tense but it was enjoyable. Then a few more, he realized the other kept pulling away from him, not in a showy manner but, before Elias will start most physical contact between them. Now? The shorter man always manages to slip away before Peter can manage anything. The pit he feels in his chest makes him feel like someone is crushing his heart. Maybe the other is still angry at him but… Peter sees Elias turn at him and smile brightly at a silly pun he made and knows it's not that. 

Eventually he braces himself and asks him out to his place, he reaches a conclusion that should let him stay all night without running away into forsakens embrace. Tomorrow he will have to but until then he can have this for himself, Peter will always come back to his God there is no doubt, but he needs something to let him give back and Elias is that to him. Something to miss.

Things go well, Elias still escapes him, but now he can see the rejection for what it is, a way to feed his god. He feels his cheeks burn and something warm and churning in his gut, he knows what it is, the stupid manual was fairly direct about it. He is oddly pleased about it, because now Peter knows how to have both, his god and Elias. 

Their allegiance is shaky, both on opposite sides but, for as long as he can balance it out, he intends to keep them both, while walking the fine line between them. He likes his gambles and this is one he intends not to lose.

Peter is a little peeved about Elias/Jonah relationship regarding his great grandfather. The other telling him that he is here because of him and not anything regarding Mordechai does sooth him.

Seeing the other man wriggle on the couch shouldn’t be as endearing as it is, he also definitely needs a new one. After a minute he caves and grabs him and makes him sit on top of him. He can feel the other man's body pressed against him and god, he had been craving this, every moment since they started to go out again, he wraps his arms against him and wants nothing more than to stay like this. Peter puts his face between the crook of the other man's neck and breathes, he… loves him, he shudders it goes against everything he was taught, but at the same time, it also hurts and makes him more miserable than he could have ever thought possible. The impossible contradictions fitting both of them perfectly.

When Elias asks he kisses him, how could he say no to this? He is nervous and is grateful the other starts leading him, eventually he experiments a little himself enjoying it. Picking Elias up and seeing the hungry look he gives him, and boy does that do something to him too, he takes him to his room, which thankfully has a more comfortable mattress.

  
  
  
  


It takes three years, and a realization that comes to him the day where he sees Elias in “their” apartment wearing one of his sweaters in only his underwear, yawning and stretching that Peter brain decides to inform him he would like to marry this man. The small part left of him that remains human whispers that it also wants him to **_stay,_ **he ignores it of course.

Marriage is not legal but, the thought it's what matters, so he makes a plan. He never cashed in the favor from the bet of the jackbox, he just needed to wait for the right moment.

In the meantime however….. Peter goes to the shorter man and kisses him, scratching him with his bear just to annoy him and perhaps… yes there!! make him laugh a little. Moments like this make it easier to feel lonely when he is gone, to the both of them.

New years eve sounds like a great time to ask Elias, he doesn't tell him about him coming back earlier, to surprise him and prepare everything for the night. The ring and paper were already written, he just needed his signature. Whether he got it or not depended all on the other. After leaving things done he dozes off on the couch eventually falling asleep. 

He will not admit outloud how comfortable the god damned thing is, Elias would be unbearably smug if he did. 

Waking up to the other lying on his chest, wearing his sweater, is such a nice view. Drifting off, the both of them, tangled up into each other is rather common. He likes the feeling of Elias completely ignoring his existence in favor of paying attention to the tv, it's peaceful.

Hours later they have dinner and when he goes to pick up the blanket in the room for the other, panics slightly thinking that he lost the paper. He looks for it and finds it underneath Elias pillow for some reason.

Then before the clock hits twelve he asks. 

….

He says yes.

  
  


One day he manages to grab Elias computer and make a very horrible spreadsheet, he knows the other would be annoyed at him for touching his stuff and doing such a terrible job with it, but Peter can't help but to find the whole thing hilarious. 

The idea came after they got drunk on their anniversary and well, they have to make things interesting. He never minded buying more rings and there is a delicious feeling of being rejected with each divorce, even if he knows that they will eventually get together again in a few months.

He hangs it in the fridge and waits. 

Elias face of outrage, while simultaneously trying not to laugh, makes his day. When he starts to yell at him for touching his stuff, Peter elects to disappear while snickering at him.

  
  
  


Oh.

Well.

He should probably had seen this coming.

The marriage certificate from their first wedding is in his hands. That its unusual because:

1- Elias was very keen on keeping it for himself 

and

2- It appeared on his bed in the Tundra a week before he would reach London.

Peter thinks back in all of the stuff he got through the years and realizes with a mounting sense of dread that it made sense if he thought about it for too long. He stares at it and thinks of throwing it away into the ocean.

He wasn't supposed to meet his soulmate. That was his rule, to keep the both of them miserable and alone, instead somehow the universe decided to have a laugh at him.

He takes a breath and thinks, he decides against throwing it. Maybe its weakness but he doesn't care right now. He needs to divorce the other and leave.

When he finally reaches London and gets home, and when did he start thinking about it like that? Peter enters and the place looks like a hurricane came and went. He sees Elias looking… upset. Something tugs at him, he pushes it aside.

“Hello my sweet anemone, what is the meaning of this?” Elias looks tiredly at him.

“Heh, i was just… figuring some things out for a future remodeling” He looks at the carpet as if it personally offended him. 

The feeling of loneliness coming from him was so… tempting. He caves and takes it in.

“I see i'll put my things in the room then” Elias grumbles a little.

When he gets there he looks at the frame with the certificate and puts it in his drawer. He calls out to Elias and tells him to please not mix his stuff with his.

The face of pure relief he manages to glimpse, before the other moves out of his line of sight, makes him feel like someone squeezed his lungs.

  
  


He stays for very little time before managing to annoy the other into a divorce. He had been working already with the ritual for the lonely so he takes the time to finish the last details.

Of course he did not count with bloody Gertrude Robinson to ruin everything with a goddamned article.

One moment he is in the real world and the next he is in forsaken and cant get out. He travels to their apartment, while feeling betrayed and the more time that passes less and less like he was a person, more like a thought just existing. He sees the bed and Peter just wants to sleep and never see an acolyte of the eye again.

Then he wakes. For some reason he had a dream of Elias opening a charity in his name, that makes him shudder. Seeing the man just next to him wearing… a sweater of his ? (he thinks he has seen it before) makes him mad and… surprisingly tired. 

He gets up, without waking him up and goes outside. Finding the jewelry shop and getting a ring after hours of walking was enough to calm him down significantly and decide to just… marry him again. It's not ideal he knows, but Elias clearly got him out of a death trap, even if he was there in the first place because of him and his archivist. Still he is unsure, maybe it would be for the best if he just left.

Later on, Peter realizes he was wrong the moment he said that maybe he shouldn't have married the other man.

Never, _never again_ he wants to see the face Elias made when he said that, he tries to backpedal but the other manages to recover enough to spit venom at him. This, Peter muses, is truly how it feels getting the air punched out of his lungs. 

Elias wants to _leave him,_ he is in no condition to do it, but manages stubbornly to move quickly and unsteadily to their room to start packing. 

Stop him, his mind provides him.

Preferably now he thinks.

He does, didn't expect the puke but he does, getting him to agree to stay, was a chore. Elias asking him if he really didn't mean it, looking at him like that… He shoves whatever sympathy he has, and gets him to bed. Peter wants to sleep with him, he goes to the couch instead. In the morning he calls Elias office to let them know he won't come and goes to prepare breakfast.

Admitting he would be lonely but not liking it felt wrong, but just this once he needed to give a little more to the other man than his god, “it” already was angry with him, this was nothing.

Peter gives him the ring and signs. Maybe, he can still have his soulmate and be lonely. Watching Elias sleep after tiring him out, he kisses him softly. He leaves for a year to pay for his mistakes.

  
  
  


That bloody woman is a menace to society, she dares to come and ask him for a ride, but when he refused she pulled the fact that Elias was his soulmate and how unfortunate it would be were the other to find out. How the hell she managed to figure it out when it took him years is unfair and unknown.

He hates her. He hopes she dies a slow and painful death. Peter agrees to take her and her assistant to an island that doesn't exist.

  
  
  


When 2013 comes and he realizes that he can finally marry the other for real he makes sure to do it right. And what a wonderful night it was.

The wedding itself was a short and easy affair. Simon and Mikaele did great and Elias, well Elias looked more handsome than usual, he snorts, what a show off. 

In the Next few years the most wonderful and exciting thing happens. Gertrude gets murdered, Elias informs him of it by a call when he has away. Almost a month later the moment he got home and saw the other man Peter made sure they didn't leave the apartment for the entire weekend. Mostly the bed. 

He only has a few pictures of Elias on his possession. Most of them are in the cellphones the other keeps getting him. Apparently he needs to be up to date with technology. 

Playing the long con of making the other man think he actually doesn't know how to use a computer or a cellphone is the greatest idea he ever had and is the most hilarious thing ever. He prays to his god that Simon won't ever snitch on him or there would be a murder. Peter enjoys the stupid silly games on his phone, there is something about sending requests for things on game to people who will never answer you back that is so lonely. It makes him smile.

Point is, he has pictures of the other man, all taken from weird angles true, some of them you can even see the blurry shapes of something resembling eyes around him. He looks at them fondly from time to time. Never enough that forsaken will corrupt them, but enough. 

Physically he only has three. One of their weddings, that is in the apartment hidden between his stuff, other is from their honeymoon that he keeps in a frame looking downwards on the ship and finally one inside a compass that he carries with him. The last one he had for years until their last divorce where he ended up putting it away in anger, forsaken tried to sooth him by taking the thing away, it was too late of course to take it back, and he couldn't get it back no matter what. That got him in a bad mood, until coming back to London where Elias got him three lonely touched sacrifices, by then he was too distracted to realize the look of fondness the other was giving him. He did ask him to "marry" him again of course.

Later still, Peter would find the compass between his packed stuff.

  
  
  


Elias called him several times through the months complaining or talking about his new archivist and assistants. He was so very incensed about the inability of the other to realize this Martin fellow was his soulmate (God he is remembering their names, he will tell Tadeus to prepare a sacrifice tonight). 

Eventually he gets a call letting him know that he wants him by the end of the month back on land to discuss some matters. Peter considers taking more time, but he really would rather sleep on a bed with his lovely and grumpy husband rather than the couch. It wouldn't be the first time he gets demoted to it. Elias gets more angry because Peter does enjoy the loneliness of it and so the cycle repeats. The other would make such a lovely sight though….

In the end he does go on time and a bet is made. 

This he thinks should be the end of things. If he wins and gets Martin to join him and kill Jonah he would be finally, truly and blissfully alone. Peter can’t, he knows that just like he knows his patron. Killing or hurting Elias himself is an impossible task, like this though ? He doesn't have to be the one doing it. Peter gets to feel the pain of losing his soulmate and the man who has his heart for years on the palm of his hand, making him finally the empty vessel he should have been.

With that in mind he agrees. He sees the other smile and knows he also expects him to fail and probably die. Peter can accept that, he wouldn't expect anything else from the other and would be offended otherwise. 

He smiles ruefully, they truly are after all a perfect match for each other. 

If a part of him does feel wrong about it, remembering the awful feeling of Elias wanting to leave him for real, Peter pushes it away.

Discussion done he goes and kisses him over and over again until they both run out of air, Elias pouts and tries to push him away. He laughs and kisses him again, more softly, feeling the other relax and sigh against his lips inching closer to him. He wonders how much he can get away now, they have after all limited time together.

A few months later he gets called to replace Elias, jail wasn't what he expected the other to go, when he said that he may have to leave the institute temporarily. Peter did offer him to arrange for house arrest but his lovely siren refused him saying that he would need to be here otherwise one of his employees would most likely hunt him for sport. 

  
  
  


Visiting hours let him rest near his husband, who ignores him in favour of paperwork. He sighs contently at the other scratching his scalp while he rests his head on his lap. Elias smiles at him amusedly. 

“I take it you are enjoying this”

“Who? Me? Not in a million years little man” He says that but nuzzles the other leg anyways. Elias chuckles and caresses his face a little smiling softly at him.

“Well then maybe i should move then if it bothers you this much” He raises an eyebrow but makes no attempt at such a thing, instead he goes back to read, this time outloud. Bastard knows he likes the sound of his voice.

  
  
  


A few days later he sees a keychain in the shape of an owl and buys it on a whim. 

  
  


Covering the institute to disappear those of the Church wasn't easy, regardless of what he tells Martin Forsaken isn't exactly meant to be used as a fighting ground, his protection is based on what he can or cannot send away. Thankfully they stragglers were so disheartened by their ritual failure and the prospect of being cut off from the rest that sending them away was blessedly easy. 

When he steps away of forsaken he gets hit by a feeling of being watched so strong it almost makes him hit the wall. His little sea shell seems to be in a mood. He hasn't gone to see him in a while. 

Peter goes to the prison, inside there, he can tell something is wrong. Elias usually exudes some form of loneliness but this is far more than normal, he can see fog that is not his, trying to get inside his husband's cell. 

The thought that he could just… let it happen crosses his mind. Briefly. He sighs and goes in instead.

  
  


The chilling fury at realizing the other is being mistreated and not eating enough makes him clench his jaw in silent indignation. Elias isn't skinny, he is strong enough to carry and use a metal pipe to bash someone's skull, but now? The prison clothes seem to hang a little looser than a few months ago and he can feel his bones more. Peter starts thinking ways to get rid of the guards and make the other stay there better. 

He can feel Forsaken retreating because of that line of thought, he will have to stay away after this, but is a small price to pay. Besides it might be the other last months alive better make sure they aren't that horrible.

He forgets about the keychain and puts it away. He doesn't see it again.

The archivist waking up was expected, Martin keeping himself away regardless of getting random junk again is perfect for him.

He would say he likes the other man, but his presence is unobtrusive and he is very adept for the lonely, he feels… not bad about what is to happen to him, but rather like it would be a shame to lose such a good potential follower.

Also, tricking him into thinking he doesn't know how to use the computer too, is maybe even more fun than with Elias. 

Simon owes him a favor and despite his enjoyment of annoying Martin he doesn't really want to talk and explain himself, there is a high chance he could mess up, Peter is self aware enough to know that he is not great at social cues.

It's only a few days later after Martin has the talk with Simon, that he realizes something has gone wrong, the office is empty with no Martin in sight. The 4 pages of paper with official resignations on top of the desk tell him he really miscalculated something. 

Checking his phone, it was on silent, he saw at least 20 missed calls and an infinity of texts from an unknown number. 

He reads the first page left on the desk and realizes, belatedly, that maybe pushing Martin to cut off his connection with his, kinda unstable and sort of lonely soulmate, might have been a touch too much, too soon.

How was he to know the other would just go up and quit????

“Fuck”

Yes he is truly fucked up now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have been waiting 10 chapters to do this and oh my god it got far longer than expected, enough so that i ended up having to cut it up here and keep going in the next chapter. 
> 
> So! We finally get Peter’s thoughts on everything, the myth, the legend, the man who would deny having feelings while still holding hands.
> 
> Peter entire thought process is something like “that sounds wrong but i don't know enough about feelings and relationships to dispute it” or alternative “That sounds fake but ok”
> 
> It was so fun to write this. I hope I managed the exact feeling of bastard for him that I gave Elias, while also keeping him disgustingly fluffy.


	12. Chapter 12

Peter sits on Elias chair and tries to think, the archivist and all of his assistants are gone,  _ Martin is gone _ and his husband is probably waiting to murder him.

Now, he could just bail on everything, there is no reason for Peter to remain now, letting Elias blow off steam for enough time should let him survive their next encounter. With that in mind he starts to get up before his cellphone gets another text.

“YoU YOu imbecile!!! A plan on the making, 200 YEARS of my life AND you couldn't keep Jon from quitting, he was ALMOST THERE PETER!! I don't even have the luxury of using Basira now, hell even Martin!! They quitted, not even that but after my “bad info” regarding those of the church the woman would not hear me out.  _ Martin would not come back _ he is too busy feeling sorry next to a comatose Jon with Daisy”

Peter feels cold sweat going through his brow, after another minute another message comes. This one is short, but it does make the blood of his veins go cold instantly. 

“Goodbye Peter” He was prepared to live without Elias for whatever time he had on earth, with the other gone his life would go into a monotone grey, but to have him still alive and yet not being able to see him again? As much as it pains him, that is not an option he is willing to let it happen. It's because of that line of thought that Peter sighs and leaves through the fog to their apartment.

Time in forsaken doesn't work the same way so it gives him time to think, Peter is definitely going to need to calm his furious siren, there is a very likely chance that the other will try to pry open his head so he needs to tread carefully. There aren't any platitudes or gifts he can offer now, which eliminates practically all of his ideas. 

Guess he is going to need to bluff his way out of this, he thinks about calling Martin but if the text is correct there is no way the other will pick up. 

Shame, he did “like” the other, in an abstract way of course, but he did.

He actually keeps walking around their apartment building, he knows Elias is there, he can feel the concentration of pure misery and loneliness that comes from the building, but he really doesn't want to go in.

The nagging part of his mind, that he always ignores for it is what little human remains in him, likes to remind him that Elias tends to get violent when things become too much for him, and in the absence of a target he might hurt himself. He shouldn't care, he doesn't.

He does.

In the end he goes in.

Peter Lukas is certain of few things in his life.

1- Forsaken was meant for him.

2- Gertrude Robinson was terrifying and he is very glad she is dead. 

And the third one that he always refuses to think too much about, but is the one that has led him into trouble the most.

Opening the door he sees Elias, while the entire place looks like a battlefield.

3- That he is irrevocably and madly in love with Elias Bouchard and despite their difference he always ends up coming for him. 

Forsaken retreats from him leaving him exposed and with a light feeling of betrayal, which is ironic, because right now he doesn't want to deal with this alone.

He enters quietly, takes his coat off and manages to hang it, without the other reacting,

Elias is sitting against the wall with his head in between his legs, still wearing the awful prison garb. 

Peter stalls.

He wants to run his fingers nervously through his scarf to get the edge off but it's not an option. So he does what he knows best and barrels through it without a second thought.

“...” Or maybe he can't, Peter remembers the fight after his own ritual failure and feels like this time is worse, way worse.

“Leave” He takes a step back in surprise. His husband clenches his hands. He has a terrible sense of self-preservation it seems, for what he decides to respond with.

“Technically _this is still_ _my apartment_ dear” The funeral silence that follows is his fault. He starts to sweat a little, maybe he should lea-

“Well, I'm sorry then, considering my own apartment got rented out after my incarceration, but don’t worry I’ll leave you to it” He started in a flat tone and got progressively more angry, by the end he raised his head and looked at him in the eyes pinning him in place.

Peter is usually quiet by nature and when he does talk with others is just enough to say what he wants (or not). Elias however makes him an idiot and he can't seem to stop, even without any kind of compelling.

“No need! you should change perhaps, that doesn't seem like a comfortable choice, i'll even fix up the place a little so it’s less…. destroyed” He tries to sound aloof like usual but his voice cracks a little.

Elias looks at him and gets up slowly. Now, he has compared the man before to a cat with the way he moves and how he would throw things away when annoyed, but right now he feels like he might be seeing a tiger about to break his neck. Instinctually he gives a step back, his husband might be shorter but he is rather strong.

“Peter, I don't think you are understanding me, either leave alone or I’ll go myself”

“Considering the police might be looking for you, along with the archives cronies I'll say that's probably a bad idea. Also, and no offense but you don’t look like you should be…”

“...” Elias looks more and more enraged, he can see him clenching his jaw.

“....on your own” He finishes that lamely.

“Oh, is that so Peter? Really??! Well mister I can’t keep control of a situation why don't you go and shove -”

“That's not fair!! How was i supposed to know your archivist would just give up, you made it sound like the man was incapable of letting things go!! Besides, why did you even let the tape about quitting there, instead of, i don't know, destroying it, i am not to blame for your own shortcomings little man”

“You know I can't destroy information just like that! Then you are to blame for being so useless at keeping Martin in the lonely, or not noticing or better yet not choosing to see that making Martin cut off Jon RIGHT now was a terrible idea?? Clearly you know nothing! I should have never trusted you to do this, you, YOU-” Elias cuts himself, lets a yell and proceeds to punch the wall in fury. 

“Shit!” He really stares open mouthed at the other who just punches it again and again until it leaves a bloody imprint.

“My plan would have worked! I finally got it, I cashed in so many favors and the chances of things going this well, he… he survived the coffin and so much mm...more and I had faith and now i.. I just “ Elias can’t keep talking because, for the first time that he has ever met him the other man breaks into a sob in front of him. 

He wants to leave, he has to stay, he should feel some form of victory over the other, he doesn't. The contradictions don't end and keep turning around his head. His gut is churning and he feels like something is pushing at his heart.

Slowly so as to not spook the other into hitting him he sneaks behind him and grabs him from the middle holding his arms, the moment he does Elias starts to thrash at him.

“Let.. let me goo Peter, Now! dam.. dammit” Elias starts to try and hit his arms to make him drop him, but he can't reach, still he does kick him in the shins.. He pushes him against his chest and holds him tight, eventually leaning against the wall and sliding to sit on the floor.

Peter takes a breath and just lets the shorter man tire himself out. He still cries and curses at him, the archivist, Martin and the others.

Peter tunes him out and just holds him, they stay like that for a while, Elias eventually stops talking and just cries himself out of sheer fury and helplessness. He hums a sea shanty and closes his eyes while tentatively putting his head in the other man's neck. When he notices that it's not likely the other would get away he grabs the hand that he used to punch the wall and cradles it between his to check it. It's swollen but at least is not bleeding anymore, he brushes his fingers softly and feels Elias flinch. It might be broken, probably, or really hurt, Peter kisses Elias neck, the other makes a noise at that, so he moves him to lay more comfortably against him.

“I was looking forward to winning our bet you know?” It takes a while for the other to answer.

“You, really wanted me dead that badly huh…” Peter smiles fondly at Elias and kisses him again, this time on his jaw.

“Not like you didn't expect the same fate for me huh? Besides… i just” He considers it, the truth, that he wanted to kill his soulmate to be alone because he made him care for him, that he could never do it himself, that he loves him just as much as forsaken (maybe he thinks, just a little bit more) Saying it with words makes it real, so instead, Peter does what he knows would make the other happy, a little sacrifice, an apology that he will not say. 

Ah what a horrible thing, the ordeal of being known.

“Elias, just this once… you can see”

The other stays quiet but he feels a tug at his brain, the other is rattled for sure, since usually the invasion it's practically non-existent in its feeling.

He thinks about finding stuff trough his life, about Elias and about a marriage certificate that shouldn't had been there, of realizations and panic, of loneliness in the face of the one he love-

He blinks and feels something wet on his eyes, he was about to say something but Elias beat him to it.

“You knew”

“Yes i just wasn't sure that-'' His husband interlocks his fingers with the hand that is not hurt and sights.

“Can i show you something?” He waits for his response. Peter mulls it over but nods, Elias clearly feels his movement and squeezes.

Peter gets the memories of Elias finding his rings and realizing too, of doubt and the realization that he loves him and that he wanted him for as long as he could, that for his god he would sacrifice him and be unbearably lonely, of days missing him while being gone and hating it because it meant feeding the thing that kept him away on the first place.

The misery and loneliness of the memories sooth him after letting Elias see him, he figures it was his own way to apologize.

They stay like this for a while, eventually he has to get up when he brushes his hand against Elias hurt one and he hisses.

“Lets get that bandaged up ok? But no more punching the wall dear” 

“No promises”

Since the living room was a mess he takes him to their room, there are a lot of his clothes on the floor but he ignores it, Elias sits in the bed while he gets the first aid kit. It's usually pointless considering the speed at which they heal, but he knows that a broken bone would take longer and besides it still hurts. So he grabs the bandages and disinfectant and goes back to the other. 

Elias looks… like a wreck honestly which makes sense. He pauses consideringly.

“Hey, would you rather take a shower now and change so i can bandage you up afterwards or should i do it now?” Elias who was glaring at his hand, startles and looks at him.

“I don't think i could wash my hair with my hand like this”

“Well that shows you not to let your anger issues take a hold of you”

“It was that or your smug face Peter” Elias sneers at him while he looks by all accounts as unaffected as usual. 

They are both good at pretending they didn't just share a moment not five minutes ago. It's one of the reasons he loves him so much, shaking his head to clear the sappy thoughts away, he gives a suggestion.

“Take a bath, I'll help with the hair and fix you up afterwards”

“Really, you?” Elias snorts and looks to the side frowning. Peter feels… a lot about how things are going, he doesn't like it one bit, but just this once, just this once he will endure.

“Yes, my crabby lover, so please take that awful thing off and go to the bathroom, i'll pick something for you” Elias groans but does get up.

“God I hate those awful pet names”

“No you don’t”

“Yes I do”

“Sure thing my lovely dove”

Peter has a lovely view of Elias, whose cheeks go a nice shade of red while he hurries to the bathroom. Fondly he thinks of kissing his face, until the other squirms for him to kiss in the mouth. Maybe later.

Quickly he goes and gets a change of clothes, but before hurrying into the bathroom, he goes to Elias side of the bed and picks up his sweater from underneath the pillow. A feeling he can't identify passas him but he shakes it off.

Inside the other is waiting for the water to have the right heat before going in. Peter picks his jail clothes and tosses them outside the room. When Elias deems the temperature adequate he gets in slowly.

Like this he can truly confirm the other is more thin, he made sure the food was better, but there is just so much he can do in a place like that without having to ask for help.

He sights and goes for the shampoo the other likes.

They stay quiet, Elias is tense but doesn't try to push him away. He remembers the song from their honeymoon and hums it, seeing the other frown turn into a barely there smile.

After he is done he helps the shorter man up and goes outside to wait. When Elias emerges he looks... better. Not perfect, but better, his eyes are still red and he has bags under them from lack of sleep.

He pats the bed next to him and the other sits, offering the injured hand. With the disinfectant he gives a full body flinch and a curse, when he is done, Peter laughs a little at the pout Elias has and proceeds to bandage his hand. He makes sure to not hurt him more than necessary and wraps it gently but firmly as to keep it in place. When finished he still holds it, he has to let go truly but, its kinda difficult. Elias he deems, is going to be the death of him.

Sensing his trepidation the other takes it upon himself to stop the contact between them. The shorter man looks up and then promptly falls back into the bed. 

“I'm going to have to leave, you realize that right? The police is definitely looking for me now, and no blackmail or money is going to stop that”

Peter stares at him and falls back next to Elias on the bed keeping only 5cm away from each other.

“Did you really had no backup plan? In case anything went wrong?”

“I did, but not for this, i didn't imagined Jon would quit, maybe Melanie but i don't care that much about her, she did her role of marking him” 

Peter brushes their hands and turns to look at Elias who has his eyes closed.

“So now what?” The other laughs bitterly. Somehow he still looks beautiful in his despair. God he is right, Peter is getting sappy.

“I dont know”

They stay like that for a long, long while.

A few hours later Peter stirs and decides to order some food. Elias seems to have fallen asleep although… He does look upset, a nightmare he supposes. He kisses his forehead and caresses his face a little, that seems to calm him down.

Calling, he orders their usual from the Thai place near their building and waits until the food arrives. He considers briefly sending the delivery guy into the lonely, but realizes that would probably get him blacklisted from that place so he doesn't.

He considers cleaning the mess in the room, but he didn't make it in a temper tantrum so Elias would have to deal with it himself. Instead he grabs the cutlery and takes the food into the room in a better mood. 

He starts eating, but doesn’t wake the other, he thinks instead about their situation and after twenty minutes he comes with a solution. There is already a feeling of loss with it, but if he can't kill Elias, nor get Martin to do it, he supposes this would be the next best option.

When he finishes eating he leaves the leftovers on the bedside table and shakes the other to wake him up.

“Fuck off Peter” Elias turns and scrunches up his nose, Peter mouth twitches upwards.

“I got food and perhaps a solution to our problems handsome” He is never forward with compliments like that, so it instantly makes Elias look scandalized and blush madly at him.

“What the fuck” Peter definetly is laughing now.

“Like i said or should i repeat myself?” Elias glares at him but the effect doesn't work considering his stomach makes a complaint.

“... Where is the food?” Peter passes it to him.

After he eats, Elias stares at him. Peter sees the green eyes belonging to Jonah Magnus and thinks that he will miss him.

“I don't want to be the head of the institute, and  _ you  _ can't go back since the police and the ex archive crew would want your blood right?”

“Yes…”

“Well, i'll just pick up some idiot and give him a…  _ promotion _ ” He wiggles his eyebrows at Elias. “I didn't manage to take Martin into the Panopticon so none of them know of who you  _ really are _ , the archivist no longer has the chance to figure it out and why would any of the others even entertain the thought that you might be a body hopping victorian mastermind?”

“Technically I was born during Regency times and you have a point”

“You must have some ideas for replacements right?” Elias frowns a little.

“I had the perfect one, but he blew himself up in an act of petty vengeance. However there are backups 3 options i believe, young, had been working there for a few years, and most importantly no family or close friends who would miss them, plus right eye color”

“I see, well, that's good to know, tell me which one you want and we can arrange the switch, as for” At that he gestures to Elias body “ What do you intend to do ?” 

“Leave the body in my office, you can report it, Basira would definitely want to check its me afterwards and then the funeral i suppose”

“You sure know how to deal with this” He sounds detached even to himself, the image of Elias body slumped in his office makes the loneliness start to seep in. His husband is not paying attention to notice or he doesn't care to.

“Yes, well at this i have experience to spare”

“You do have to wait until they die” Elias gives him a look “The archival team i mean, before you start your ritual again and also to play nice for a while so as to not raise suspicion” Elias huffs at that

“I should get rid of them now”

“What are you going to do? Murder them yourself? Like you said before, you already used favors and burned a lot of bridges. Whoever you turn into has to start from scratch at forming connections” 

“Then what? I just let them go, play nice for a couple of lifetimes until I can try again? Is that it?” Peter mulls it over and cups Elias face with both hands. The other frowns but nuzzles a little at him.

“The way i see it, yes, you have to, otherwise switching bodies would have been for nothing.”

“What if they decide to inform the new archive group i hire, it will just keep going over and over”

“Then you make sure there is no way for them to. Besides why would any of them want to go back?” Elias snorts and looks at him fondly. Better than the fury from hours earlier.

“You really don't know how people work do you?” 

“We both know that i don't, that's why i have you”

“Yeah…” Elias tugs at his shirt to bring him closer and Peter feeling like a magnet being pulled, does it. He takes a breath and kisses Elias, leaning forward he wraps the other into his chest and falls onto the mattress putting his shorter husband on top of him, being careful with the injured hand. He sighs and kisses his forehead making a crown. 

He knows the other loves it.

“Elias”

“Yes, Peter? We still need to figure out the finer points if we want to do this” Peter closes his eyes and clutches the other a little bit tighter before replying.

“Ill help you until you get the promotion then i'm going back to the Tundra”

“Really then? i suppose i kept you away for too long huh, i hoped you might stay a little get to kno-”

“That's the thing, actually”

“Excuse me?”

“Elias Bouchard will be dead, so i'm going to be a widower, I gotta mourn”

“... Peter that's ridiculous, i'll still be there, i'm not dead, why would you…” The feeling of beholding is still unpleasant but he is tired of fighting it.

“... You are for real” He sounds incredulous and dare he say it, hurt.

“I'm afraid so. I cant kill you, i … care too much to do it myself, the bet is off so Martin is not an option, this is, even if symbolically speaking, a close second to it” Elias tries to get off him but Peter wont let him.

“Let me go YOU, Peter release me this instant how dare you-”

“Elias, I have given too much and too clearly for you, in this couple of months. Forsaken is not… thrilled.”

“SO you give me up for dead when I change? is, is that it? You don't want  _ me,  _ to leave  _ you,  _ but if it's the other way round you are aloud ??” He manages to raise himself up enough to look at him in the face.

“Yes, I didn't like James all that much, but as Elias i…” Peter blushes but decides to keep going there won't be a next time for a long foreseeable future.” I fell in the closest thing to love we could have. You told me yourself a long time ago, that your personality was partially affected by your host, who's to say when you change i don't…”

“You dont like me anymore” Elias said  _ like  _ but they both knew it's not the word he meant.

“Perhaps, you were willing to let me die for your goals, just like I was to get you killed. Maybe this is the favorable outcome” The other man grabs his side with enough strength to leave a bruise. 

“ Peter, regardless of either of our plans you. Are. Mine. My soulmate and my husband. Fuck that, ill still be me, dont fucking do this, please” He wants to cave, he does but…

“No, im sorry Elias”

“Sorry?? Ill fucking show you so-” 

Peter rolls them over and kisses him in the mouth.

“FUCK YOU, you dont get -” He bites his neck and starts to caress him. “Peter pleeeeaase” 

“... How about this, I'll come back only if you find a way to make me want to. No phone calls and i won't visit”

“Then -huff-, how will i nghh” He kisses him softly on the lips to cut of a moan.

“Figure it out Elias”

Afterwards they are both tangled into each other. Peter wants to stay, he also wants to leave. Elias has that effect on him and he doesn't know what to do with it. He kisses his cheeks and eyelids, then the tip of his nose and his grumpy husband sighs tiredly at him but touches his face slowly tracing his freckles. He doesn't get his obsession with them but he would not comment on it, the feeling is… nice after all. God, fuck it, he will pay forsaken back later.

“I love you” He reaches for the injured hand and kisses it. Elias is taken aback but gives him the most shy of smiles he has ever seen him do.

“Love you too, even if you are a bastard” Peter snorts a little.

“What for?”

“Leaving, lying, making me believe you didn't know how to use a computer for 15 years”

“Oh. You saw that mm in my defense i just though it was hilarious, also you looked practically deranged when i did something stupid with my cellphone”

“No i did not”

“Yes you did”

“I did not look deranged Peter don't be daft”

“Mmm sure thing my guiding light” Elias groans but buries his face into the crook of his neck and kisses his collarbone. “So do you accept?”

“Mm?” 

“To win me over and make me come back?” Elias tenses but stays where he is.

“If it's the only way you to come back sure.”

“Then it's a deal” He draws circles on the other bare skin, making him shudder. He asks in his most jovial tone “So! who is the lucky man who gets a promotion?” Elias takes a few minutes to reply.

“I have 3 options, i would like you to…”

“Yes?”

“I would like you to choose which one.” He blinks

“You.. want me to pick your next body for you?”

“Not pick it, just choose out of 3 options previously approved by me” He wonders if this is also a way to ensure he comes back, by choosing someone he likes. Peter thinks about it and decides to go with it, after all, he can't refuse him.

“Sure” Elias kisses his throat and Peter wants to have another round, he loves him and wants to make sure to enjoy his time with Elias while he still can.

And because the other is a wicked man who knows him very well, he turns Peter onto his stomach and straddles him.

“I'll give you their names and files and you can pick in the next few days how does that sound lovely” He lowers his voice at the end and Peter just melts.

“Wha… of course”

“Then let's keep going love” Elias leans forward and kisses the back of his neck.

“Please”

  
  


“William Radcliffe, Alexander Hawthorne and Elliot Bradbury” He reads their names and looks at their pictures. 

Peter goes into forsaken and follows them for the day. It takes him almost two more before he makes any choice. Elias has been preparing the necessary paperwork for everything.

“I have chosen”

“Oh?” Elias looks up from the computer. “And the suspense is killing me” 

“Sarcasm duly noted dear, anyways William it is” Elias raises an eyebrow at him.

“Really? I would have thought maybe Alexander”

“Why?”

“He looks fairly similar to Elias”

“Yes well that defeats the point of body hoping into a new host doesn't it?”

“Not really, I have preferences, so  _ why Will _ ?” He curses and answers, even if he doesn't want to.

“He looks similar to Jonah Magnus, has a really pleasant voice, plus he is still short”

Silence stretches for a long while.

“You chose someone who reminded you of me..?”

“I.. figured you might appreciate it?” Elias looks at him for a minute but turns to the computer eventually.

“I see, well he is a rather good choice”

“...Ok?” He blinks confused but decides to just shrug it off.

Hours later Peter is cooking and feels a pair of arms wrap around his middle startling him slightly.

“You are a sap and i hate you so much” Chucking he keeps cutting the meat for dinner.

“Really? i couldn't tell, what with the surprise hug and all”

“Fuck off Peter”

“Sure thing Jonah dear” Elias stiffens.

“Turn around” Peter drops the knife and reluctantly does.

When he looks at Elias, the other looks up at him and stands on the tip of his toes to reach his face and kiss him on the mouth, over and over, soft little pecks that start to make him dizzy with a specially nice feeling. Why has he chosen to be this particular brand of soft he doesn't know, or care Peter is just going along for the ride. 

That basically summarizes their entire relationship.

He grabs him by the waist and spins him, while chuckling, making Elias yell at him to stop. When he does he dips him and kisses him properly. 

“Enjoying yourself mister Bouchard?”

“Unfortunately no, you see i have a very annoying husband keeping me in the air, i swear if you drop me.” 

“Do i look like Simon to you?” He does put him back on his feet properly though. Dinner won't cook itself.

After dinner, Peter, feeling particularly fond considering they have less than a day or two together like this, in what is probably a long while, decides to annoy the other a little.

“Elias?” The man in question has gone back to work, now he looks like himself which is funny, the man has probably been a workaholic since ancient times.

“That is not true and you know it”

“That you are a workaholic or ancient? Because i have bad news for you my little shellfish”

“Please stop” Peter grinning from ear to ear. Goes and whispers next to Elias.

“Never” And proceeds to lift him princess style.

“PETER!” He manages to take him to their room and drop him in bed before the other attempts to strangle him.

“Your majesty looked like he needed a rest! I was so very gracious to do it”

“God, I hate you!”

“I hate you very much too love” Elias seems to malfunction at that and he wonders idly if perhaps he had just given him a heart attack.

“Ugh”

Peter smiles at him, decides to take a page from Simon’s book and let gravity consume him, by falling on top of a very pissed off looking victorian, sorry regency, man. 

Two days later they have a man knocked unconscious on the panopticon and Elias is picking tools to do some eye surgery.

“Now before i start, are you going to stay or leave while i do this?” Peter considers it, he has some morbid curiosity about the whole thing but, on the other hand, he doesn't know if that would be worth the mental scarring.

In the end he doesn't really think it's worth it, so he steps outside.

It takes the better part of an hour and he can hear Elias making pained sounds until he doesnt.

That's when he steps inside. Elias body is cooling on the floor, while William tries but fails to rise up. With a knot in his throat he manages to ask.

“Elias?”

“It's William now dear” The man looks like a mess, sweaty dark auburn curls sticking to his forehead, pale skin due to blood loss, he really looks like a mess. 

He can already feel the tendrils of forsaken tugging at him so he has to hurry up. Do i take him up now or..?”

“Yes, if, if you could i'm just going to stay here” Peter pauses and looks at the stranger, (not a stranger) that looks miserable and has an air of loneliness already clinging to him. He hesitates.

“I'll leave after dropping him off you know” William, curls himself up a little into a ball.

“Yes i know...Goodbye Peter”

Peter clenches his jaw, he goes to pick up Elias body but… he stops and sighs. He turns quickly, gets down and kisses Williams forehead before rising up again. Picking up his husbands, ex-husbands body he leaves the Panopticon.

He doesn't intend to go back for a long while.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter and then the epilogue. Honestly i did not think i would write this much for this story but im happy with it. Im glad people liked it, i didnt have that much faith since its my first long written one, but all the comments made me want to finish it.


	13. Epilogue

William hasn't seen Peter in two years. There was a scandal after Rosie, bless her, found his previous body slumped dead in his office. Like he expected, Basira went to check it and make sure it was really him. 

Afterwards she came to his office to talk with him. He decided to just tell the truth. Mister Lukas came and offered him the position out of nowhere, the man seemed keen on just leaving the institute and not speak with him anymore than necessary. 

He had been working at the Magnus Institute since he was 24 so seven years now. The whole thing came out of nowhere but how could he refuse such a good offer? Yes, he is aware of the supernatural, he had an incident when he was younger that led him to work here.

She looked at him suspiciously at first but the more he spoke and acted baffled about it, the easier it was to convince her of his innocence.

She let things go, and explained the situation regarding the archives. He nodded and agreed to make things better from then on forward.

Since he will have to wait, someone interested in stopping rituals like Gertrude will have to do.

Elias didn't have a funeral but rather was simply cremated. The ashes he suppose will go to his ex-husband. Melanie, Basira and a blind Jon went to check it out. Some form of closure he supposes. It infuriates him and he is tempted to get them killed out of spite, but he supposes they have won their freedom. 

Martin and Jon had gone to live in a little house in Scotland, both keeping each other company.

The bitterness shouldn't be a surprise and yet.

He doesn't get any lost objects. William doesn't have any way to communicate or see Peter. 

Going back to their apartment is not possible, Peter changed the locks which already tells him enough. So instead he gets a much nicer place than what William had originally been able to afford.

The new archive team is… boring, the archivist is a very level headed and pragmatic woman of the likes of Gertrude Robinson. Time will tell if she can step up to her level, as for her assistants they all actually have degrees and are completely capable. After the disarray the previous two archivists left the place in, he would like the place to have some form of organization.

After two years of no news or lost objects, he resigns himself to live like he did before meeting Peter. The thing is, he can't, all the things from before that he found and kept in the institute are now in his place. They are useless but he cherishes them non the less.

He has a few hookups but he is not really into it, more of a thing to pass the time. 

Checking on Jon turns out to be a bad idea because of the jealousy he gets from seeing him and Martin together, it makes him mad so he doesn't do it often, for his own peace of mind. 

It isn't until two years pass, when he is celebrating what would be their anniversary on his own, drinking wine and cake on his couch that he gets something. 

William almost misses it but when he turns to grab the remote he sees a rock, simple and innocuous but in a very nice emerald color.

He stops breathing, slowly almost as if it would disappear he cradles it between his hands, as if it was the most wondrous thing ever. And right now it is.

Finally he has a plan.

He writes, every week, he writes a letter, puts it in an envelope signed to Peter and chucks it somewhere. Hoping to forget where. When he goes looking for them they are gone.

Not a single one asks him to come back. They are a way to vent on what happens to him. About work, some annoying thing Simon did, on his new hires and the ones that look like won't last a week. He mentions some statement givers who escape the lonely. 

He never gets a reply. But, slowly he gets more stuff, none of them paint a picture of what Peter is doing. William has tried to see but the fog is stronger than ever and not even a glimpse of his soulmate he can have. The other god mocking his inability to watch and that stings.

Without anything else to do, he just writes. Sometimes he gets tired and angry so he curses the other out, over and over. After that letter disappears, he finds a mug with an owl in a pirate hat.

Eventually, he stops. There isn't a point, when he knows there won't be an answer. For the next months he stops writing, as William he seems more attuned to solitud. He entertains the thought that Peter also chose him for this particular reason.

After 3 months of not sending anything, he gets a piece of paper. There are only two words written on it.

“Keep writing”

Oddly enough that gets him to smile.

Three years without direct contact and just the note are perhaps not looking good, but… to him is enough. If Peter wants to go slow he can, he has enough patience to spare.

It's during dinner that he starts to wonder, he and Rayner have to steal bodies, Simon just remains the way he is, the desolation followers are wax and don't age. How can he keep Peter then? He will have to wait until his next attempt for a ritual, which means… that he wants the other man to be there. Waiting like this is dreadfully boring.

He hums a sea shanty that he remembers Peter singing in the shower, while he washes the plates. Body hoping could be, there is loneliness there, but it's his own preference to keep Peter as himself. 

First he needs to make him come back and figure out the limitations into forsaken. Maybe asking Simon later then.

Half a year passes with him still writing, when he gets home and there is a box for him he hurries to open it. A painting of an ocean landscape, it seems old and doesn't go with his preferences, he frowns wondering what the catch is until he sees a card attached to it. 

It read:

“So you can keep an eye on things”

He blinks and after a second tries to watch through it. The thing has several eye motifs hidden in it. It's perfect to hang it in the archives to spy on his new archivist, who does seem to be as quick witted as Gertrude.

He puts the card next to their marriage certificate, the first one, and the piece of paper from before.

A couple of survivors from the Tundra come and give statements, mentioning the mysterious captain and the odd ritual. William sighs and keeps the recordings with all the others he has from his hus- from Peter.

Four month later, he is in his office working, he couldn't find the thing so it's a matter of time. After more clothes of the other started to appear and some more gifts William decided. If this doesn't work nothing else would.

He leaves for lunch and when he comes back to his office, sitting there innocently next to his broken owl cup is a green velvet box.

William caresses it a little and opens it. Inside there is a ring, when he tries it on, it fits him perfectly. Putting the little detail into one of his many letters paid off it seems. There is also a note.

“William, dinner at 8 ill pick you up”

It says the name of the restaurant they went on their first date and the actual date that its a week from today. Underneath that it's the part that makes him give the terrifying shark smile that Peter hates.

“I would love to”

For the first time in almost 30 years he asked first. 

Jonah Magnus has figured out how to keep Peter with him for as long as he lives, William will pop that question when they see each other next week. But considering the other has already agreed to marry him he doesnt think it would be too hard.

…

…

…

He says yes.

Jonah smiles and for the first time in almost four years kisses Peter Lukas.

The other grabs him like he will disappear in smoke and kisses him feverishly, over and over. He doesn't say sorry, William doest expect him to. It's in their natures. He gets Peter to carry a wedding ring with an eye on it to let him see him from now on.

Peter stops biting his lip and whispers against it.

“Love you” Jonah feeling fond and wanting, kisses him back and leads them to his bed.

Hours later, after finishing discovering his new body, lying on bed with Peter clinging to him half asleep, he kisses the top of his head and closes his eyes feeling content. His soon to be husband traces the freckles on his shoulders and nuzzles his neck.

“Love you too” God he really does love him.

Seeing and hiding, he would never ask for anything else from the other. And knows it's the same for Peter. 

They, after all, simply complement each other perfectly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And we are done! Thanks for reading please leave a comment and tell me what you though!


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